Hi Saturnzoon, thanks for sharing your experiences with us. What stands out for me from your post is that you don't talk much about your new case worker. I wonder if it is worth giving them a try - let them get to know you? Perhaps ask for a meeting to work out what the plan is going forward. Maybe ask questions about what help they can offer, how often you might speak with them, and importantly, ask when hospital might be an option. I understand that you feel frustrated but having a new case worker perhaps give you a new opportunity to have these conversations, to discuss your concerns and to to begin to develop your trust in them again. I know it might seem like hard work - but often these conversations can lead to some clarity about what you can expect from them and this leads to you feeling more supported. Something to think about I guess.
I also wondered about what else you do with your time. I know having no motivation can be a struggle but often other forum members talk about the need to make small goals each day. They also emphasise how important it is to have some support - whether in person, by phone or online. You have got online sorted by coming here - what about other supports? Do you have any interests or hobbies that you could pursue - starting off small perhaps?
Perhaps you might also like to call our Support Service to talk through your options for support.
Please keep trying - these forums are full of stories about change and hope - it is not often an easy journey but we can support you along the way.
