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Briars
Community Member

Hi all, 

I’m an alcoholic drinking 1.5 bottles of wine a day. Have done two stints at 7 day rehab last year but nothing sticks beyond 60 days. Desperate…

2 Replies 2

Sophie_M
Moderator
Moderator
Hi Briars, 
 
Welcome to our friendly online community. We are so grateful that you decided to reach out here as we know it can be really tough to do this for the first time. It’s a great step to have taken, and we’ll be here for you on this journey.  
 
It can be really distressing to be dealing with this, have you reached out to anyone about this? We know you mentioned previous stays in rehab but this could be a conversation with your GP or with any existing mental health support, or a chat with a loved one who you feel will be supportive in helping you to change this behaviour. It sounds like it would be really good to discuss this with are our friends at Counselling Online, who have some really good resources on Making a Change, here.

There’s also the Beyond Blue helpline on 1300 22 4636, or on webchat if you’d prefer to speak to counsellor there. Our kind and understanding counsellors can talk this through with you and help you to figure out how you can get some support on the path to sobriety.  Other community members have previously mentioned Daybreak, the app, to be a useful resource. You can find out more about this here. 

This is a judgment-free space, so please feel free to share, knowing that you'll be met with understanding. Hopefully a few of our welcoming community members will pop by soon to welcome you and offer some words of support and advice. 

Kind regards, 

Sophie M 

therising
Valued Contributor
Valued Contributor

Hi Briars

 

I'm wondering whether you know why you drink. Can involve so much more than alcohol simply being an addictive substance. While some people can start drinking for one reason, they can continue drinking for a whole variety of other reasons. We can't always necessarily see the transition taking place over time. I feel for you so much as you struggle with something you're desperately trying to have victory over.

 

As a gal who began drinking when I was 16 and largely stopped in my mid thirties (I'm 53 now), my relationship with alcohol was definitely a love/hate one. While I simply loved the way it led me to feel when I began drinking at 16, I ended up hating what it was doing to me. While I loved the way it led me to feel so free spirited, I hated the regrets that came the next day and how much deeper my depression felt. I loved the way it eased my social anxiety, stopped my tormenting inner dialogue, gave me the freedom to experience 'happiness' and what I felt as other high end emotions (as opposed to the low end ones). I loved the way it led me to 'achieve' so much more. In hindsight and as eventually a non regular binge drinker, I hated the way it had taken away my ability to feel the need to develop social skills, feel the need to face the tormenting dialogue head on, feel the need to better understand and develop myself emotionally etc. Coming out the other side of drinking, suddenly I was sober to all these feelings and needs yet with no skills with which to cope. Might sound a bit strange but while drinking just a couple of times a year now, the only reason I drink is specifically to alter my mind. With alcohol being a mind altering substance, you could say I drink to get the odd 'high' or 'trip' a couple of times a year, kinda like how some people would perhaps smoke a joint a couple of times a year. I've gone from drinking so as to not feel low to drinking to get an occasional high. Hope that makes sense.

 

I've found alcohol to be an incredibly complex thing, far from a simple addiction. I think this helps explain why it can be so hard to stop. The reason I largely stopped is because I came out of long term depression. The compulsion to drink was no longer there. If anything, drinking interfered with how I wanted to naturally feel life. While I occasionally struggle with periods in depression, as opposed to being in a long term depression, there is also a need to feel what is naturally depressing me. I figure, how can I know what's depressing me, while addressing it, if I'm numb to feeling it (through drinking)? 

 

While everyone has their own story as to why they drink, I thought I'd share my own story in the hope that it helps shed some light on why the compulsion to drink can be there. From my own experience, I'd have to say that sometimes the underlying reasons for drinking need to be addressed above anything else because sometimes we're drinking for exactly those reasons.