(Trigger warning) How do I talk to my parents about self harm urges?

[...Gekota]

Hi, I’m new to all of this forum and I’m not to sure what to expect but I thought if anyone can help it would be people who understand. I’ve been self harming for around a year or so I had been, after my parents found out along with some other complications concerning my mental health, they made me stop. I still have constant self harm urges most days and more then once. I don’t want to stop, I know that’s wrong, well I don’t but that’s what people tell me. I can’t stop thinking about it and I’m not able to talk to my parents about it or my therapist. Self harming helped me in some ways and I don’t know how to explain it but I don’t want to stop. I haven’t told my parents that I continue to feel as though I need to do more because I’m unsure how. I don’t know what to do, please help.

[Sophie_M]

Hi Gekota,

Thank you so much for taking the brave step of sharing what must be very confusing urges and thoughts . We know it isn't easy to take such a step but it is so important that you have.

Members of our valued online forums community give and recieve support to one another based on their own experiences with mental health, some of which will be similar to yours. While the support offered here is often quick in the grand scheme of things, it is not immediate. So if you are looking for more immediate support, we'd recommend reaching out to our friends at KidsHelpline on 1800 55 1800 or via webchat here https://kidshelpline.com.au/get-help/webchat-counselling.

Professional mental health counsellors from our Support Service are attempting to reach out to you via email as we are worried about you.

Once again thank you for reaching out to and joining our online forums community. We hope the support you receive here will help you better understand and manage your mental wellbeing and look forward to you checking in and letting us know how you're getting on whenever you feel up to it.

[romantic_thi3f]

Hi ...Gekota,

Welcome to the forums and I'm really glad that you reached out. You are right in that there are people here who do understand, there are lots of members who struggle with self-harm as well.

I know that your post title is about talking to your parents, but I wonder if talking to your therapist could be a good first step. The reason that I say this is because therapists are generally cool and calm and collected, so there isn't any chance of them overreacting, and they also understand that while self-harm can be a problem, not everyone is ready to stop yet. With parents, it's great if they can be supportive but often self-harm is really misunderstood. Your therapist could even help you have that conversation and prepare for it, if that's something you would like.

Is this something that you would be open to? It can be really hard to open up about it, but it can be a lot easier when you have support around you. Hopefully talking to us can also make it a bit easier to have that conversation.

I hope that this helps -I'm sure others will jump in too and feel free to jump in on other posts as well.

rt

[...Gekota]

Thank you, I really appreciate the help. I’ll try to talk to my therapist the next time I see her. Thank you.

[smallwolf]

I won't go into the ins and outs of self harm, but on talking there are a number of possibilities ... I have spoken with my psychologist about suicidal thoughts. The first time was difficult but got easier after that - at least for me. I have also handed her notes in my journal. And as rt said, they will just talk to you about vs the experience you might get from other people.

One time my psychologist suggested I tell my wife about my thoughts and easier said than done. In relation to my own parents they got a different version so they would not be so concerned about me. There are a number of resources you can get further information...

• https://resources.beyondblue.org.au/prism/file?token=BL/1302
• https://www.beyondblue.org.au/the-facts/suicide-prevention/feeling-suicidal/self-harm-and-self-injury
• https://www.lifeline.org.au/get-help/information-and-support/self-harm/

Hope some of this helps.

Peace to you,

Tim