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Suicidal thoughts and self-harm

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Sophie_M Do you have a safety plan?
  • replies: 97

Safety planning involves creating a structured plan – ideally with support from your health professional or someone you trust – that you work through when you’re experiencing suicidal thoughts, feelings, distress or crisis. Your safety plan starts wi... View more

Safety planning involves creating a structured plan – ideally with support from your health professional or someone you trust – that you work through when you’re experiencing suicidal thoughts, feelings, distress or crisis. Your safety plan starts with things you can do by yourself, such as thinking about your reasons to live and distracting yourself with enjoyable activities. It then moves on to coping strategies and people you can contact for support – your friends, family and health professionals. The safety planning model was developed in the US by suicide prevention experts Barbara Stanley and Gregory Brown. It has been used extensively by US veterans’ health organisations, hospital emergency departments and high schools, and there is strong evidence that it works. Many health professionals in Australia also use some form of safety planning to support clients experiencing suicidal thoughts or feelings, or after a suicide attempt. beyondblue has an app you can use to create a safety plan, called BeyondNow. The BeyondNow app takes the principles of safety planning and makes it even easier to use – so rather than carrying around a piece of paper, you’ve got it on your phone at all times. It’s free to download from the Apple Store or Google Play. If you don’t have a smartphone or would prefer to use your desktop or laptop, BeyondNow is also available to use on our website. Do you have a safety plan? Do you have questions around how you might create one, or fill out some of the sections? This thread is for discussing ideas around creating a safety plan, and sharing tips about what has been most useful about this process for you. Below are two videos featuring Peter and Nic, who have both used safety plans successfully. Peter Nic

Sophie_M PLEASE READ THIS FIRST: posting in this section
  • replies: 0

Life gets pretty hard sometimes and many people in this online community have had times where they have thought about hurting themselves or ending their life. This can be a stressful and at times overwhelming experience, and this section is here to h... View more

Life gets pretty hard sometimes and many people in this online community have had times where they have thought about hurting themselves or ending their life. This can be a stressful and at times overwhelming experience, and this section is here to help members who have had these experiences. This is a place to share where you are at, seek ideas for help and know that you are not alone. We are here to create a safe environment for everyone. Please do not provide any details about any plans/ideas that you may have had to hurt yourself, and importantly, help us to understand if you are safe by letting us know in the post. Making comments that let us know that you are having thoughts, but are safe, helps us to know that your conversation can continue without interruption, and that we do not need to put any further follow up for you in place. This section will not be for everyone.It shows posts from people who are distressed, offers public replies to these posts, and encourages people to come back and share how they got past that difficult point in time - what worked, what didn’t and how they now approach these difficult thoughts. It is important to think about what you want from the forums, what information you need and what threads will be helpful to your situation, rather than reading everything that is posted. For some people this section might be difficult to read – if it is not helping how you feel, then please consider moving to another section. This section, like the rest of our forums, is closely monitored and all posts are reviewed by moderators before publication. Moderators will also ensure that anyone needing follow up will be provided with information about how to access further support. ​This section remains a discussion forum focused on helping each other through the dark times, it is not a crisis support service. Any posts that do not abide by the community rules will not be published. Unlike other areas of the forum, threads in this section will be closed after a period of one month of inactivity. If you are in crisis or need immediate help, assistance is not available via these forums. Please call Suicide Call Back 1300 659 467, Lifeline 13 11 14 or contact emergency services on 000.

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Nahmate830 I want to say how I'm feeling but know that I cant.
  • replies: 4

I'm struggling, I'm hurting, and I'm tired. I really want to be able to say how I'm feeling without fear of repercussions, but that isn't the world we live in. I'm not really sure if I want to be dead or I just want all of lifes bullshit to stop and ... View more

I'm struggling, I'm hurting, and I'm tired. I really want to be able to say how I'm feeling without fear of repercussions, but that isn't the world we live in. I'm not really sure if I want to be dead or I just want all of lifes bullshit to stop and cant see another way to make that happen. I'd like to just simply post a link to radioheads no alarms and no surprises and see if anyone gets it and reaches out and checks if I'm ok. I feel so stuck, so trapped inside myself and I cant seem to move forward. I'm sorry that I'm a broken record, that I need so much from people and that all of the wonderful things I have in my life aren't enough to redirect my feelings. Although I have a reasonably developed plan, I haven't written any notes of goodbye lately and I wont hurt myself no matter how badly I want to, and I want to so badly, I want to talk about the want and the feelings I think it would give me to hurt myself but I cant even do that. In these forums its not appropriate, in my personal life those who I might tell would be traumatised and if I tell a professional then they might be obligated to tell authorities or even try get me sectioned. thanks for reading, sorry for being a downer and a drainer, I hope you all know true peace in your lives. NM

jessimin my best friend's dad suicided and i dont know what to do...
  • replies: 2

hi, 3 days ago i was with my best friend who got a phone call from her mother telling her that her father called crying about something he has done (assumedly something unlawful) & was something quite surprising & alarming to her... the next day, she... View more

hi, 3 days ago i was with my best friend who got a phone call from her mother telling her that her father called crying about something he has done (assumedly something unlawful) & was something quite surprising & alarming to her... the next day, she hasn't heard from him - no one had. & as the next day approached, still nothing. my friend kept me updated on this as i was the only one that knew about this because of the day of the phone call. they called the police & they found him... suicide. my friend jokes around a lot, especially about serious things. so of course when she told me (mind you i was the first to know outside of her family), i refused to believe it... and i told her that. i told her that i dont believe her. but when she sent me a video explaining everything that had happened, i realised that i have NEVER seen her cry up to this moment. it was all very real. ive never experienced anything like it so i dont know how grief works. but she APPEARS to be doing fine but i know she's not. & i dont know if it's a coping mechanism or whatever... my friend has dealt with terrible things in the past but she has never opened up to me about it. she's usually always the one who puts a happy face on all the time & i think thats what she's trying to do... im scared she may do something? im scared that she isn't coping very well & im trying so so so hard to support her but i need advice on how. ive never done this before, so thank you for reading.

Kailani Relapse
  • replies: 20

Hi, I am new to the online forum and just want to stress that I am currently safe. I recently relapsed for the first time in a while. I have had other individual relapse occasions but this is the worst relapse in a while. I won't mention how as that ... View more

Hi, I am new to the online forum and just want to stress that I am currently safe. I recently relapsed for the first time in a while. I have had other individual relapse occasions but this is the worst relapse in a while. I won't mention how as that is not appropriate but what scared me was it felt good (I am in no way promoting self harm as I know deep down it is not healthy and only offers temporary relief). I found I was calm afterwards and it temporarily relieved my inner turmoil. I currently have no support network. I don't see a psychologist and my family are unaware of my behaviour. I guess what I wanted to ask was how do you guys deal with the shame and guilt of relapsing? How did you eventually get some help? I am not yet ready to reach out and ask for help but I hope I am in the near future. Finally I want to end this by saying I hope everyone is safe and well, remember you are not alone in this fight!

Kombie390 *Trigger warning* I made a plan
  • replies: 22

So I've made a plan. Is this a vent. A cry for help. I don't know. This has been thought about for weeks now and I have tried every distraction I can think of and do. None of these have worked I have thrown myself into each of them to the brink of be... View more

So I've made a plan. Is this a vent. A cry for help. I don't know. This has been thought about for weeks now and I have tried every distraction I can think of and do. None of these have worked I have thrown myself into each of them to the brink of becoming physically unwell. Its part punishment knowing I don't deserve anything good not even this life of mine I'm currently living. It's to change these thoughts and part trying to take myself out before I plan to carry out the plan. My counsellors are all unaware they are concerned because the past few sessions with each of them I have sat in the chair in almost silence to not allow my voice to accidentally slip up and say the wrong things making them even more suspicious. I don't want to be locked away for my own protection. I want to make this final choice for myself. Lately it feels like choices have been taken away from me or been made for me. I have tried to re-anchor myself to stay for my kids I can't my brain won't allow it. The dissociation makes it feels like I've been picked up in a cyclone and it hasn't tossed me out yet dumping me somewhere. As it has been life has been swallowing me whole then spitting me back out. I am raw from life's issues. I am tired. I just want a little peace within.

Russian_Red_Foxx [Trigger Warning] I am feeling lost. Please help...
  • replies: 9

Please help. I am really struggling to find reasons to live. In the last six months, I have attempted suicide twice along with a number of attempts at self-harm. Just a few months ago, I ended up having to go to hospital in the back of an ambulance b... View more

Please help. I am really struggling to find reasons to live. In the last six months, I have attempted suicide twice along with a number of attempts at self-harm. Just a few months ago, I ended up having to go to hospital in the back of an ambulance because I had a severe anxiety attack. So far, it has been getting progressively worse and I have no idea what to do. I am feeling extremely lost inside and I am unsure about where or how I can get help. This was the only place I could think of as I don't have a phone and it upsets my friends every time I talk to them about something like this. Often, talking to my parents struggles to get me anywhere as I sometimes struggle to get along. I also lack access to teachers and councellors at school as I am on a shortened timetable. I find that one fix is consuming caffiene, which only works temporarily. I hear that it can give you anxiety. Bullying has also been a severe issue for me. Particularly because it was my best friend from last year who kept picking on me. I am really finding it difficult to get help and I am just lost. Please leave your ideas in the comments.

Insignificant_other I don't know why I'm here
  • replies: 6

Hi. I am new here and just need to get something off my chest. I have no idea why I exist. I am 31 and there is no one in my life other than my parents who cares about me. And even they are getting sick of me. They think I'm too old to be looking to ... View more

Hi. I am new here and just need to get something off my chest. I have no idea why I exist. I am 31 and there is no one in my life other than my parents who cares about me. And even they are getting sick of me. They think I'm too old to be looking to them for support but I have no one else. Noone ever answers my messages, I reach out to lots of people but never get responses, or I get really short responses with zero effort. And I even try and keep it fun by sending funny stuff, or memories, gifs etc. Churches constantly let me down, doctors let me down, people in general just let me down and disappoint me. I've come to a point that even if someone does make plans with me I always expect them to not show up or cancel all together and that's exactly what happens. I'm just not important. I have never been in a relationship and I don't know why. I am athletic, I play sports, I also play many instruments. I am smart and I have a sense of humour. I may not be the most attractive person but I am not hideous. I just missed something and got left behind at some point. I started study again and now I go to school with 19/20 year olds who I can't relate to. I've tried meet ups, social groups, therapy, everything really and I just think I don't fit in anywhere. There must be something wrong with me. So why am I even here? I believe in God and because I respect him, I would never kill myself.. but I have asked him to kill me. But he obviously doesn't want me either, because he's keeping me here like this. What is there left to do? I've tried living for myself but it's lonely, I've tried living for others but they take me for granted. What's the point?

Miiia How do I go on ??
  • replies: 2

My sister committed suicide in December 2019. It was devastating and I have been struggling so much & tonight I have been self harming to cope. I miss my sister so much. We were very close and I had 2 sisters. All of our lives we have been mentally a... View more

My sister committed suicide in December 2019. It was devastating and I have been struggling so much & tonight I have been self harming to cope. I miss my sister so much. We were very close and I had 2 sisters. All of our lives we have been mentally abused by our "mother". She is a narcissistic and controlling witch who drove a wedge between each of us with a lifetime of lies. I have only just been back in touch with my younger sister after 15 years due to the lies our "mother" created. But when we fell into each others embrace, this January, we went straight back to that beautiful, close sisterly bond we have always had. It took the death of our beautiful sister to bring us together but I know she would be so happy that us "stupid bitches' are talking again. That's how we roll. My ex husband died 2 months before my sister and that was difficult to accept too as even though we were divorced, we were still very close. Now I am alone except for my two little dogs and I feel like my time is coming to an end. Being back in touch with my younger sister is wonderful and I love her so much but she has her own family to care for, she can't take me on as well, even though I know she is very worried about me. I just feel like life is not worth it anymore. My two fur babies keep me going and give me my ONLY reason to wake up each day. Sorry if I have said to much here. Just sitting here crying and listening to songs that have so much emotion behind them as I remember my sister. I don't know why I am posting this.......loneliness, desperation, sadness, devastation & wishing I could phone my sister just one more time to tell her how much I love her.

Deconstructing Why does Australia cease basically all online help at midnight? Poeple stop having problems at that time?
  • replies: 6

Apologies for all the typos, I’m shaking so badly my fingers are bouncing all over the keyboard. I’m sure there are people willing to text chat at 2am, but I’ve been scouring the web for days, and nothing. I can’t do phone due to crippling social anx... View more

Apologies for all the typos, I’m shaking so badly my fingers are bouncing all over the keyboard. I’m sure there are people willing to text chat at 2am, but I’ve been scouring the web for days, and nothing. I can’t do phone due to crippling social anxiety. I’m under immense emotional/psychological stress from housemates. One is my just-ex of a 15 year relationship, and she knows ever tiny weakness I have, and she’s using them to shred me, (i have several mental ilnesses) I’ve had a box cutter shoved in my face (by her older son by previous marriage) cliched shaved head, works out, nazi tatoos and (supposedly) ceased long term ice habit, who told me ‘I’ll cut you*. I managed a trip to the polie station today with the help of an innaporpriate amount of benzos. One officer was nice, one not ( they play good cop bad cop with victims now?) I was unwilling to get an intervention order,because this guy is not sane, I’ve been around enound to see it make things worse as much as better, even the officer said, at the end of the day, it’s only a piece of paper. Anyway after after i left the station, for whatever bizzarre reason, they decided that the son, being the physical threat, might benefit from a call to his mother, explaining i had concerns. I might be guessing, but i would think that’s illegal, or at least malpractice. As you might have guessed, this helped like dropping a nuke on it, except it didn’t end the war, it made it nuculear war. I don’t get angry or violent. Not that i don’t want to , but any confrontation and my axiety basically makes me shake so hard i can’t hold up a cup. I can’t find any live chat help, especially re: emergency housing, or social housing anytime in the next ...years (i’m on a disability pension). The couple i did see on a page cost $350 A WEEK for a small 2 bedroom unit. I’m currently paying $290/fnght for a 3 bedroom house. anyway, almost emergency housing type things want a police report, ive gone to crazy lengths to avoid that, as all my ex wanted for years was to be reunited with her son. I don’t care emotionally much anymore, but they are still people, and I’m not an complete asshole. but i’m losing it fast, i need to talk to someone, i need to get out of here, and i can’t find ..much at all, the housing web pages are horrible loops that go nowhere, and due to cicumstances i can’t really chat before midnight,when everything closes. any online live help, advice, links, etc, much appreciated. Thanks.!

Lolababygirl Newbie
  • replies: 3

Hi I’m new here and I have not had a good year. I recently received bad news that has sent me over the edge.

Hi I’m new here and I have not had a good year. I recently received bad news that has sent me over the edge.

Rickyss Hypochondriac?
  • replies: 2

Hi, just joined the forums trying to get some help as I’ve struggled with this for probably over 10 years, recently gotten a lot worst. I have always been concerned about my health. Convinced myself I’ve had every disease possible. However recently I... View more

Hi, just joined the forums trying to get some help as I’ve struggled with this for probably over 10 years, recently gotten a lot worst. I have always been concerned about my health. Convinced myself I’ve had every disease possible. However recently I had a massage after the massage I convinced myself that if the masseuse had blood on her hands/fingers and the blood got into me I contracted hiv. I have put my life on hold whilst waiting to get tested (6weeks) some people call me delusional and I wonder if I am, is this just a fear or am I actually psychotic? i get to the point some days where I just think ending it would be so much easier then dealing with the constant thought process. I can never find a doctor who can help or find any treatment as for me I believe 100% atm that I have hiv