Suicidal thoughts and self-harm

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Welcome to the Suicide and Self-Harm Section

replies: 0

Hi there, Welcome to the Suicide and Self-Harm section of the Beyond Blue Forums. Life gets pretty hard sometimes, and many people here on the Forums have had times where they have thought about harming themselves or ending their life. This can be a deeply distressing experience, and this section is here to support members who have had these experiences. This section is not a crisis support service. If you are in crisis or need immediate help, assistance is not available via these Forums. Please call: Suicide Call Back Service on 1300 659 467 (24/7) Lifeline on 13 11 14 (24/7) If it is an emergency, contact emergency services on 000. This is a place to share where you are at, seek ideas for support and know that you are not alone. We are here to create a safe environment for everyone. Please do not provide any details about any plans/ideas that you may have had to hurt yourself, and importantly, help us to understand if you are safe by letting us know in the post. For some people this section might be difficult to read – if it is not helping how you feel, then please consider moving to another section. This section, like the rest of the Forums, is closely monitored and all posts are reviewed by moderators before publication. Moderators will also ensure that anyone needing follow up will be provided with information about how to access further support. If after a period of time you no longer wish others to engage in the discussion you have started, please use the 'Report Post' button and request the discussion be locked to prevent any further replies. Thank you for being here, we're glad you're here. Treat yourself gently as you read through this section. Beyond Blue

by BeyondBlue •

Community Manager•

Posted in Suicidal thoughts and self-harm

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3 weeks ago

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Do you have a safety plan?

replies: 97

Safety planning involves creating a structured plan – ideally with support from your health professional or someone you trust – that you work through when you’re experiencing suicidal thoughts, feelings, distress or crisis. Your safety plan starts with things you can do by yourself, such as thinking about your reasons to live and distracting yourself with enjoyable activities. It then moves on to coping strategies and people you can contact for support – your friends, family and health professionals. The safety planning model was developed in the US by suicide prevention experts Barbara Stanley and Gregory Brown. It has been used extensively by US veterans’ health organisations, hospital emergency departments and high schools, and there is strong evidence that it works. Many health professionals in Australia also use some form of safety planning to support clients experiencing suicidal thoughts or feelings, or after a suicide attempt. beyondblue has an app you can use to create a safety plan, called BeyondNow. The BeyondNow app takes the principles of safety planning and makes it even easier to use – so rather than carrying around a piece of paper, you’ve got it on your phone at all times. It’s free to download from the Apple Store or Google Play. If you don’t have a smartphone or would prefer to use your desktop or laptop, BeyondNow is also available to use on our website. Do you have a safety plan? Do you have questions around how you might create one, or fill out some of the sections? This thread is for discussing ideas around creating a safety plan, and sharing tips about what has been most useful about this process for you. Below are two videos featuring Peter and Nic, who have both used safety plans successfully. Peter Nic

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Feeling sad

replies: 2

Hi I'm not doing well just feeling sad but I'm safe. My partner has cheated on me many times and I'm just broken. His also an alcoholic and my friend came down to visit and all they have done is go to the club and drink but nothing with me it's like I don't exist. This is his behaviour when he cheats. I also found out about 4 months ago he went to sex workers and lied to me for two years about it and in that time planned and made a baby with me. I'm not well physically either and at this point I just give up.

Running low on resilience.

replies: 6

Hi I posted a week ago when I was at a low point. I’ve tried to be positive, count the small wins etc. It works for a while but feels like I’m tricking myself with distraction because when I think about it, the issues are all still there. Only some are getting worse. The thing is that tackling a relentless flow of big problems, for over 50 years, wears you down and the resilience tank is empty. I can seem totally ok but if the smallest thing happens I mentally implode and become a mess. How is that meant to be worth living with. Every day. Im Having the “do I or don’t I” talk daily now. I’m not worried about dying, I’m worried about it failing and living even worse than now. I'm not sure why I’m posting this but probably because I have nobody else to talk to.

Lost and desperate

replies: 6

This is my first post and one I have written and deleted countless times. In the last few months I have attempted and wanted nothing more to end my life. I suffer from severe depression and anxiety and find most days all there is is darkness. I have in the last few months deleted all social media, lost all friends and family and become beyond afraid of venturing beyond my front door. I live on heavy anti dispersants and fight for anti anxiety medication because of its addictive properties. I have both a supportive gp and psychologist but that never makes the darkness go away. I am mum to speical needs children and a FIFO husband. I have no family support and some days am lucky to sleep 5 hrs a night. I have been recommended respite in a hospital but as I have only tried to end my life I guess you must be unconscious to qualify. The sad truth is depite it all. I want nothing more than to end this curse this pain!! Honestly no one would notice if I were to disappear as I have lost all family and never had any friends! So what on earth is the point. Year after year of darkness, honestly why can I not sleep never to wake. What does it take to be sick enough!

Reaching out

replies: 4

Hello everyone! I’ve never spoken or asked for help, I’ve been feeling suicidal the last few days , mainly from financial stress, can anyone give me any advice on what or who helps them ? Thank you

I’m trapped. How can I escape? There’s no hope.

replies: 48

The pictures and flashes of me killing myself are an endless loop. They go on and on and on and I can’t stop them. I don’t know what to do anymore. I get triggered so easily. I just want this pain to end. I’m trapped in my own head. I’m suffocating in air I thought was safe. I can’t escape... how do I escape this? There has to be another way. I fear there may not be any hope for me anymore. No one can help me so why bother? It’s like I’m dead already, just watching myself. Like I’m not even here anymore. What’s the point of this. It’s getting too much, how do I escape my own mind?

Have no motivation

replies: 5

Hey Need some ideas as I have no motivation and feel like a failure.I do get thoughts of self harm but I wouldn’t go through with any of it. I am off work at the moment as I can not deal with it at the moment

Hey, second time here 🙄

replies: 13

Hey i posted here back in 2017. feeling useless, tired and really just want to give up. i posted here in 2017, feeling exactly the same although probably more now than then. im now 46, married with an 18 yo daughter. Still getting absolutely no where in life, I work and pay bills, that’s it. That’s all I do, nothing else. All I now want to do is shut myself away from everyone and everything and just disappear. I’m really done with life, I have lived the last 20 years like this and I can’t do it anymore. I have one or two good days here and there where I can have a laugh, but that’s getting rarer and rarer. sorry for the waffle on, just need to get it off my chest

bf cheated with sex workers

replies: 4

I found out over a year ago that my bf of 20 years had cheated on me with escorts from sex and dating websites and visited brothels locally and also when he had been away on his annual holidays without me. This had gone on for over 4 years from the proof i have but i couldn't go further back to know if he had done it our whole relationship. He denied it all and said he was only looking at pictures but his phone records show a different story, 50 calls to sex workers in one day was one of the records. I am still with him but every day I'm in tears and sometimes i don't even eat because i feel so sick about it all. I don't know if he is still doing it as I'm to mentally drained to keep checking up on him so i don't look at his phone or anything anymore and i have suicidal thoughts on bad days, i sometimes wish i was dead so i didn't have to think about it all anymore. I feel like i wasted so many years on this person and i love him so much and had always done everything for him. Can something like this heal or will i feel like this every day forever, its already been over a year and tears still flow and i look at him and cant believe he lies to me when i know everything hes done, i just hadn't told him how much information i have. 20 years is a long time to throw away

Just WITHOUT Sense/Hope/Direction

replies: 2

For me I am 26 Year's Old and I am still pursuing My Driving Tragically, I've had a lot of Prior and Current Set Issues with that, I can Pay for that at the moment fortunately though, I also don't have Payed Work History, Just 11 Month's Volunteer In a Salvo's Role In something that I didn't want, I don't have any Academic Entry/Level or Interest for a Generic UNIVERSITY Course to prosper me a Bachelor Degree, and the Responsibility Element next to TAFE, Is harder to adjust to for my position, I don't like anything at TAFE, My Only Generic Educational Curriculum towards Traditional Study was Nutrition, but If If I can't handle a Bachelor Degree, than It's Just a Cert IV at TAFE, I don't want Entry Job's, Retail, Hospitality and Factory and I don't want Construction, Apprenticeships or Trades I don't have any Friend's without Standard Driving and Work, you feel In valuable to have any, and you feel Ugly without Women Experience too My Father Oppresses me from Talking about my Problem's, and my Mother Speaks Positively but than She act's like I'm complaining and that Change Is Just not going to Happen, She treats me as a Special Individual, and accepts my Life to be Meaningless For me I am wanting to be Creative with Music, but I feel Under Confident with my Father Living at Home, I also wouldn't want that Direction with a Hopeful Generic Status Life, and I'm not Extroverted for a Stage, My Personality still deeply want's to be Creative and Talented, as a Hobbie, I also wouldn't want Company that I don't Relate or Like There's Really No Alternatives, as Creativity Is the Main Fulfillment and Interest, Hope for me, and It's not Just a Reality of a Pathway that wouldn't suit me, It's something that seems as the only Suited thing, I Just can't make sense of my Life, and with me, No one can understand, They only give me Wishful thinking

A somewhat Positive Achievement

replies: 47

Hi everyone, I just wanted to share a somewhat important milestone for myself. A few days ago I went to a GP to get a mental health plan done. This was huge for me as I have a fear of doctors and feel like I don't deserve help. While I experienced some of the highest anxiety levels in my life leading up and on the day of my GP visit it went relatively ok. The GP I saw was respectful and understanding of mental health which is rare within the medical field. Also just a random question but has anyone done the dass 21 assessment? How did u find it? I think as a mental health assessment it isn't too bad. The plan for myself is to start the process to go to a headspace clinic. This is inevitably going to be a long process as the wait times are always long (I have been to headspace before when I was younger). While this is not their fault as they do their best while fighting a difficult battle, it is hard knowing I will have to continue to fight my battle alone for a while longer. I know this sounds selfish as there are people going through worse things. To complicate things where I live we have gone back into lockdown (I am sure u will all figure out which state I am in so hello to my fellow West Aussies). While it is only 5 days and I both understand and respect the need for this lockdown (we have to do our best to protect the vulnerable and each other), it does mean my wait for headspace will be even longer. I know this sounds selfish as there are bigger things going on but I am really struggling. Anyways enough about me. While I have the energy to write up a post I just want to apologise for not offering more support to everyone in this online community. I find that whenever I go to type a response or offer support it just doesn't sound right. I worry about saying the wrong thing. So while I may not respond, I promise that I see u, I hear u and I support u.

Welcome to the Suicide and Self-Harm Section replies: 0

Do you have a safety plan? replies: 97

Feeling sad replies: 2

Running low on resilience. replies: 6

Lost and desperate replies: 6

Reaching out replies: 4

I’m trapped. How can I escape? There’s no hope. replies: 48

Have no motivation replies: 5

Hey, second time here 🙄 replies: 13

bf cheated with sex workers replies: 4

Just WITHOUT Sense/Hope/Direction replies: 2

A somewhat Positive Achievement replies: 47