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Tierd of fighting

Aimee_S
Community Member
So, I have been self harming for 8 years after my sister took her own life. I was harming myself almost daily and have recently gone 7 months and then 4 months without. I have been working so hard to use alternative strategies, becoming more aware of my triggers etc. I am also actively in a DBT group. In May I needed surgery due to my self-harm. I am in the same situation after my relapse last Monday. I am so tired of fighting the plastics dr's don't want to operate on me because I did it too myself again. They don't see the intense effort I am putting into my recovery and how disappointed I am in myself for relapsing and to the extent I did. Has anyone else had similar experiences? How did you deal with this and keep going when it feels like those who are supposed to help don't?
13 Replies 13

romantic_thi3f
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Hi Aimee.S,

Thank you for sharing your story with us, and I'm sorry to hear about your sister. It sounds like you've been offered so much support and advice here which is wonderful.

I don't think anyone has said this yet but a big kudos to you for going 7 months and 4 months. What an incredible streak! I totally get why you would feel that way with the surgeon. The sense of someone wanting to help you, and you wanting help but the timing not being right. It's so upsetting when you know this is what you want,

romantic_thi3f
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

part two! (sorry about that)

Relapses happen. Sometimes all the coping skills we know go out the window. That's okay. You're not back to square one. You've still learned so much, you've still made it so long without self harming. You still have all of those skills with you despite that relapse.

The grounding exercises are sooo good. Have you ever thought of making a self soothe kit? It's like a box with things to help keep you safe, whether it's a safety plan, creams, photos, perfumes/smells, something to eat/drink.. Especially anything that feels sensory (sight, smell, touch, sound, taste).

I hope this helps a little. Keep going, you've got this.

rt

Just popped back in to see your progress Aimee.S. I see you have a lot of support already. And we are so grateful you are replying.

Your dog sounds like a great pet to love and cherish. We have a mini foxy 9yo and she is our baby. We adore her and she repays our affection 10 fold. I'm happy you have a dog that loves you that much.

TonyWK

Amazing! I am very proud of you. If you keep using those mechanisms regularly, they will start to feel normal to you. I know you can do this.