I'm stuck and i want to die.
My only support is my friend but I've stopped telling her things because it puts to much weight on her and she's already been through so much. My mental health has gotten to a point where I'm seriously considering going to the hospital, but I can't because I'm 13 and I don't trust my parents. They're great people I just don't trust them. I wish I could just die but I couldn't do that to my siblings. They're 8 and 10 and i love them to the end of the world and back. I got yelled at for crying (I'll admit it was for a stupid reason) and it made me feel like trash. No-one takes me seriously because I'm 'not emotionally mature enough'. I have a self harm addiction and no one knows because they don't pay attention to me at all.
Please someone just talk to me like a human and not a 6 year old.
We’re really glad you could come to the forum to share this with our community. We know it isn’t easy to share something like this, but we think it’s a powerful step and we really appreciate your openness and bravery in sharing.
We’ve reached out to you privately to make sure you’re ok (please check your private email inbox). If you want to reach out to our counsellors to talk this through, we’re on 1300 22 4636, and you can reach us online here. There’s also our friends over at the Suicide Call Back service on 1300 659 467, or Lifeline on 13 11 14, or Kids Help Line 1800 55 1800
We also really recommend having a look at the Beyond Blue safety planning app. You can read about how it works and where to download it here. You can even call Lifeline and complete it with one of their counsellors over the phone if you'd like.
PLEASE NOTE: If you ever feel unsafe, please call 000 (triple zero), or attend your nearest hospital emergency department for care.
You sound like such a deeply feeling person, the way you feel what people say to you, the way you feel so much for your siblings, the way you feel concern for your friend and you not wanting to upset them too much, the way you feel the need to reach out here and so much more. You have what a lot of people lose as they become older, the ability to feel so easily and so deeply. You have an incredible ability that can become so challenging and so deeply painful at times.
Feel free to talk here about how you feel life. While a lot of our struggles here on the forums can appear different, our ability to feel stress or anxiety or heartbreak or the emotion of feeling so lost can be similar in some ways. So while most of us have put the sometimes stressful and depressing nature of secondary school behind us, for example, we can still relate to the incredible struggle of navigating a whole new lifestyle or style of life and the feelings and great challenges that can come with that. We can also relate to what having no obvious guidance feels like (how stressful and lonely that can feel at times).
Emotions/feelings are so important because they tell us so much. They can be like a compass in a way. You don't want to lose that compass or be led to forget about it (through being conditioned to ignore it/suppress your feelings). Learning how that compass works (what you're feelings are telling you and how you need to manage them) means you can begin to trust in it and use it in a lot of different ways. Whatever the feeling was that led you here to the forums, you trusted and here you are meeting others who are able to feel as deeply as you. As you face one of the hardest times in life, coming to know who you naturally are, my heart goes out to you. Who we naturally are can sometimes be far from what others have led us to believe, about our self.