My journey has about twenty years long. After my daughter was born I started getting anxious, after my son was born I was diagnosed with depression, but the treatment (medication) turned me into a zombie so I gave it up and there was no follow up. I was just trying to push through. fifteen years later I broke down into a mess one day after are you OK day and listening to a podcast about other people's experiences with depression I realised that I really did need treatment. I couldn't keep on going. So I did the scariest bravest thing ever and went to my dr. I have been having treatment and feeling great for about 5 years. and soon I celebrate with a solo concert, my first in six years, about my journey. Singing, exercise, family, medication, meditation. Monthly dr visits keeping me on track. This work for me. My son has just been diagnosed at 18 and my heart breaks for him. he started treatment on the weekend. I just say, there is light at the end of the tunnel. My concert is called BRAVE! because just admitting I needed help was the bravest thing I have ever done. When I have been really black I don't feel like singing. I do it anyway, because i am a teacher and it is my job, and for me it has helped me come through. So has being honest. Whilst I have met some professional discrimination, which has been enormously discouraging, there is something powerful when someone whispers to you about their anxiety and depression (it is so common) and I an whisper back "me too". When the days of tears arrive (and they still do) or the days of "I am just going to bed this afternoon" (much less often now!) I am kind enough to myself to know that I am looking after me. Self kindness has been a revelation. I may be broken, a little, but that is part of my whole and I accept it. Websites like Beyond Blue helped me get help. Thank you.
