Setting goals

[Rukirra]

I've been told that setting goals can help in overcoming depression and anxiety. What are some examples of goals that helped you?

I'm looking for short-term and medium-term goal options.

I currently have one goal, and that is to lose weight. But i am needing more day to day things to help distract me.

[Mia001]

Hi Rukirra,

I love setting reminders on my phone if the things that I need to do each day. I find a lot of satisfaction in completing all my tasks for the day. (It’s also good so I don’t forget 😂)

It might be really simple things like booking a haircut, buying a few groceries we need, vacuuming my room... whatever.

I haven’t been there in a while but I love the thread 3 things to be thankful for today in the BB Social Zone. Maybe you could set a goal to post there every day, or even just a few times a week.

Or you could plan to have some time for yourself every week. Have a bath, read a book, have a coffee with a friend, go to the gym... whatever you love doing.

Hope this is helpful. 😊

Mia

[Mia001]

Sorry, 3 things to be thankful for today is actually in the Staying Well section.

[romantic_thi3f]

Hi Rukirra,

Thanks for your post! Yes setting goals is very helpful with depression and anxiety! Are you looking for short-term/medium-term goals to help you with your major goal of losing weight?

Either way - I'm probably finding this one a little hard to answer because it depends ultimately on where you are at now and how much of an impact your depression and anxiety is having on you. To say 'go for a walk 3 times per week' might be too overwhelming right now, and that's okay. Break it down so that it's where you are at right now.

One thing that is really helpful when making goals is to make them SMART. This stands for specific, measurable, achievable, realistic and timely. This helps because they're more likely to be successful; by being specific, you know exactly what your goal is and whether it's realistic. If you wanted to lose say 20kg in one week - that's a specific and measurable goal but not a realistic or achievable goal. Does that make sense?

Perhaps it might help to think a little more in depth about your goals; how would you feel once you lose weight? What would your life look like - what sorts of things are filling up your day?

There are a couple of things that might be helpful to look at too; about goal setting and SMART goals -

https://www.blackdoginstitute.org.au/docs/default-source/psychological-toolkit/13-goalsetting-(with-gp-notes).pdf?sfvrsn=2

http://wellness.ucr.edu/Smart%20Goals.pdf

Hope this helps! 🙂

[Peppermintbach]

Hi Rukirra and all,

I think this is a fantastic thread. I know it has been a while but I liked the personal goal that you set for yourself 🙂

I have been thinking about self improvement/(trying) to be a better person this weekend.

So I wanted to share some of my long-term life goals, so I can come back here as a reminder when I feel as though I’m steering off course.

• Try to take the high road: the low road may be very tempting but I almost always regret it! Avoid being petty.

• Save my efforts for when it really counts, rather than fixating on things that don’t really matter in the long-run.

• Actively practice self awareness. Examples:

- My ego is usually not a very healthy or helpful voice to listen to. Work on identifying and challenging that voice.

- Continue practice stepping back from my own emotions to walk a mile in another’s shoes.

- Continue working on improving my communication skills.

- Avoid immediately responding or making major decisions when I’m feeling highly emotional. Give myself at least 24 hours. At least....

- Etc.

• Practice resilience: my mentality is everyone hurts & experiences adversity. So struggles are a universal human experience (to varying degrees). Things such as grief, loss, heartbreak, disappointment, etc is something most of us have/will face. My goal isn’t to avoid pain, but it’s to learn how to manage difficult circumstances in a healthier way.
• Surround myself with people that I want to learn from; people who make me want to be a better person, purely because they lead by example.

• Don’t get too emotionally involved in other people’s personal problems, and if I feel excessively emotionally invested (when it really has nothing to do with me), it suggests that I need to look inward to figure out what is unresolved/need to work on within me.

• Continue to show up for people that I care about. When I say that I will do something, the follow-through is (even more) important. To me, caring is a verb, not just something to “say.”
• When I apologise, I can explain but avoid making excuses for myself.

• Make time & put in effort into meaningful relationships. The operative word is “meaningful”, so not just “any” person because I’m desperate for attention, validation, feeling lonely, etc. Choose wisely.
• Recognise when I’m speaking or making decisions from a place of hurt/insecurity/fear, as that tends to cloud my judgment.

That’s all for now...

Apologies for the length! If you made it this far, thank you so much for reading 🙂