Money stress? You are not alone!

[Sophie_M]

So, I’ve been chatting with my friends over here at Beyond Blue and it seems we all have something in common right now: money worries.

Whether it’s stressors about finding enough cash for the basics or wishing we had enough money for a holiday, we all seem to be experiencing a greater amount of stress surrounding money than we have in the past. And it’s impacting our ability to show up fully for the things we love.

It’s not uncommon for us to experience shame and fear around expressing our financial challenges; it can be hard and somewhat taboo to openly discuss money matters. However, we believe this conversation is incredibly important and beneficial to have. Like all challenges, ‘a problem shared is a problem halved’, so let’s help each other out.

Of course, discussions about the economy and how to manage our money during inflation are a much larger (and frustrating!) conversation… but what we would really love to know is what your personal experience around money is.

• Are you feeling the pinch too?
• How is added financial pressure impacting your wellbeing?
• When was the last time things felt even slightly easier?

And if you have struggled with money in the past but come out the other side, what suggestions do you have for others who might still be finding their feet?

This is an opportunity to share openly and honestly about your experience in a judgement-free space. There are no wrong answers, and we encourage you to share all the things that you might be finding hard to express in your every day life. 

Looking forward to your answers!

Abundant hugs from yours truly,

Sophie M. 

💙

[blondguy]

Hey everyone

I heard you on 3AW and thankyou for your effective and well articulated comments on this important topic. Financial hardship can exacerbate even mild mental health issues. 

I have experienced this during years of ongoing anxiety and it doesn't help when our employer is a multi-national and they still believe that even a successful senior executive with low level anxiety are 'crazy' I nearly lost my home many times due to the macho corporate mentality that is still alive and well. Beyond Blue and the forums do a great job of providing awareness.

Corporate Australia isn't listening. Thankyou for the excellent thread topic and on 3AW too! 

my kindest

Paul

[Eagle Ray]

Hello Sophie, Paul and Everyone,

Sophie, thank you for raising this important topic. Paul, I’m sorry you’ve had that experience of nearly losing your home which is very stressful. Mental health and financial issues can definitely be closely intertwined.

Financial stress is especially high for many at the moment with the cost of living and housing. I know I am more fortunate than some yet I still feel vulnerable on a fixed income.

At the moment I have a rule for myself that I have to try to keep my bank balance above a certain level. I refrained from a recent almost impulse purchase (ADHD tendencies) recently to ensure I don’t spend beyond my means. I bought new sandals today because my old ones are cracking, but basically making the decision to buy just what I need going forward and protect against future risk.

The “squeeze” that gets talked about with financial pressure is a very real feeling. I try to trust that I will find ways forward that will help myself out, such as doing a small business idea on a very small scale at the moment that I can manage to supplement a disability pension. It is only incremental income at present but it’s something I enjoy doing so it’s good for my mental health too. But I would love to get more ahead. In a dream reality I would get myself off the pension and be self-sufficient but learning to be realistic about health limitations and just go one step at a time.

I am naturally optimistic at heart but I know I need to be grounded too. I’m scared about maintenance costs on my home but I’m lucky to have a home, so I try to get out of that anxiety and appreciate what I have. It’s often solving things one step at a time. I worry a bit about my 25 year old car but it’s running well at present. But I know realistically I have to budget for its possible demise in the not too distant future and have something in reserve for that. I live in a small town with no public transport so I dread the thought of being trapped there. I’m having feelings of wanting to move back to the city where I’m house sitting at present but have to realistically evaluate that too cost-wise. There is a lot of asbestos all through my home which made it affordable but I realise now it probably wasn’t a great idea as I fear it will be hard to sell, especially at a good price, because of that. I was not in a good place when I bought it and didn’t have the skills to identify all the maintenance issues that have piled up since moving in. My home has started to feel like a burden and possible financial risk going forward if I struggle to maintain it but I don’t know the best way of solving that yet. Being on my own I feel very isolated with no one to discuss things and problem solve with.

I pay out quite a bit for heath costs and reach my Medicare threshold every year, but that does mean my specialist and psychology appointments are much reduced after a certain point.

So financial things sit there in the back of consciousness but I’m also trying to enjoy life in the present. I’m a household of one so I only have myself to think about. I know it’s a real challenge if you have a family.

Things felt easier for me from around 2007-2015 when I was working quite a bit and could build up more income. I wish I had the capacity for that now as I enjoy working and feeling part of a community but health issues as well as care commitments in recent years have really impaired that capacity. My superannuation has been limited too due to the loss of work in recent years. I’m not sure what the future will bring but I’m doing a lot of healing work on myself which I feel will help me in other ways too.

I’m interested to hear of anyone’s tips for financial management and good mental health in these times.

Best wishes,

Eagle Ray

[BlueFireLady]

I dont sleep and become physically ill.
Where do you go when there is no solution? As a business owner we have a contracting business. We have not received a single payment since december. I have a job and tiny income outside of the business to get by but bills come monthly and they are already calling asking how much i can pay. I told one that I could pay $2 thats how bad it is. 
I know they are only doing their job and I committed to loans to build our business but this is not the first time where we’ve had to wait months to be paid. We just get back on our feet and Xmas comes along and shut down periods and then all of a sudden nobody is paying us.

I’ve called all the financial institutions all the help pages for financial trouble. They can’t help you unless you have a tax debt or unsecured loan. which they only set up a payment plan which I can do myself and you end up paying them to help you pay that other institution. so who do you turn to?

I become physically ill at just the embarrassment of telling your bank “I don’t know when I can pay money” and it’s not because you’re hiding from them. It’s because you physically can’t. And there is no indicator to when you will receive your own payment.

my husband works so hard and is away as he is a FIFO worker. I can only speak to him so much before I feel it becomes too hard for you to be my support network because I know he feels it too.

I was reading a post on here yesterday when I was starting to feel really down late last night and how this person just wanted to disappear . every time I get back to this place where the money stops coming in and I feel physically sick again. I don’t exactly want to take my life. I just want to disappear maybe just not wake up the next day. it’s scary when somebody you work close with comes to you and also discloses that they’re having such a hard time in their life that they’ve actually taken their hands off the wheel the day before on their way home. And I’m want to not burden anybody else with my problems because it’s so embarrassing.

They admitted they were so embarrassed that they got to this point and I automatically put aside any of my troubles because they didn’t need that on top of everything that they were going through.

I have found in the past. I have written journal entries I just wrote everything down, and even I go back and read it and sometimes it doesn’t make sense but at the time it must’ve helped.

as I write all this down I do wonder if at any point my sad rant helps anybody else and I hope it does

[Eagle Ray]

Hi BlueFireLady,

I wish I knew how to help. I just located the Support Services page on the Australian Financial Security Authority website. My guess is you have already done this, but just in case there is free advice via the National Debt Helpline on 1800 007 007. If you click on the more info link on the AFSA page there are more specific helplines listed but I’m guessing these are the ones you’ve called already.

I am hoping the payments come through for you as things pick up again following the Xmas shutdown period. Hopefully you will be able to get back on your feet again as you did before. But given the stress involved, do you feel the contracting business will be right for you in the long term? Is there a way to build up your other work and ease out of the business if the level of stress is so much?

I really feel for you and I hope you can find a strategy soon to manage a way out of the difficulties. Remember there are people to talk to on services like Lifeline if you find your mental health spiralling. I know you didn’t share with the other person going through financial difficulty because of their struggles, but it’s really important you share what’s happening and seek support as you have by reaching out here.

Yes, journaling can be helpful. Sometimes when we just write stuff down, like a stream of consciousness, stuff comes out that we may not have been consciously aware of that gives us some clues about how to move forward.

Take good care and wishing you the very best 🙏