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Just Sara A Bouquet for Pearls - share your appreciation for other members
  • replies: 715

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful word... View more

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful words. I hope this thread stays active through members giving out praise regularly to people they feel deserving, and therefore keep generosity of spirit alive within the pages of BeyondBlue Forum. My bunch of Red Roses (my choice) goes to Wishful for the following sentence; 'Personally, I see no reason to be praised in me, but I'm learning that seeing through the eyes of others can be more accurate!!' I so hear you Wishful. Just beautiful... Try to keep your leading comments short to focus on 'their' words. Choose specific flowers (or a gift if you like) to present to them. Sign off respectfully and sincerely. I hope this takes off... Spreading the love...Sara

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dalecoach Dealing with Day to day life
  • replies: 1

Hi all, I am new to the website and wanted to share my story because it is easy to talk about it when I am typing on a screen while face to face conversations about this are still very difficult.I have been a sufferer of depression and anxiety for a ... View more

Hi all, I am new to the website and wanted to share my story because it is easy to talk about it when I am typing on a screen while face to face conversations about this are still very difficult.I have been a sufferer of depression and anxiety for a number of years now and last year I had 15 ECT procedures. The disappointing thing to come from that is I have lost some significant memories like my wedding which upsets me greatly. As a male who grew up in a family that believed all males must be strong and never be seen to fail. As a husband I feel like I have failed because of this illness. It is frustrating because unlike a broken bone you don't know when this will end. I have been lucky that the friends I have are very supportive and one in particular gave me an opportunity to work in his company by making me a role. I am now general Manager which I am proud of. The days still come by where the dark clouds hover above me and I still struggle to deal with them and certain situations. I am someone who is prepared to listen and help anyone out that I can to ensure they don't suffer like I did. No one deserves to go through what I have been through and if I can help one person then I have achieved. Dealing with day to day life is a constant battle and I would love to hear other peoples success stories on staying strong and fighting this thing head on. Thanks for listening. Dale

Liam007 I finally started enjoying one of my old hobbies again!
  • replies: 3

So I used to love sculpting figures out of clay, I made stuff like the shark from Jaws and the Winter Soldier from Captain America. I had someone vandalized one of them which left me sad and embarrassed and for a long time I refused to do it. But aft... View more

So I used to love sculpting figures out of clay, I made stuff like the shark from Jaws and the Winter Soldier from Captain America. I had someone vandalized one of them which left me sad and embarrassed and for a long time I refused to do it. But after the heartbreak with my community play turning out awful I finally decided to give it a shot...and I actually built and completed a model! I'm seriously happy! Whilst I'm not feeling entirely better and still have a long way to go I'm so glad that I finally managed to do it! That's one thing down but quite a lot to go. But still a victory! Thanks for reading!

WarriorGirl90 Today Was a Good Day
  • replies: 6

When I was 15, my best friend ended her own life. I did everything I could to keep her here, I arrived too late and that sits with me every day. Although part of me knows that it is not my fault, I still shoulder the blame every day that I should hav... View more

When I was 15, my best friend ended her own life. I did everything I could to keep her here, I arrived too late and that sits with me every day. Although part of me knows that it is not my fault, I still shoulder the blame every day that I should have done more. I relive the moment in my head each night when I fall asleep. Some nights I even save her but then I wake up and she is gone again. Sometimes I forget her face, so I see my own face. It haunts me like it were yesterday, but as of November 3, it will be 9 years.I am not a suicide risk, but I do suffer from depression. I find that crazy because I have done a lot in my life which I tie to living out what my friend and I always spoke about. I regularly travel the world, I always have a well paying job, I have friends that would do anything for me but I am never happy. I feel like every smile is forced, every conversation is exhausting, when people ask me to do things I get annoyed and agitated. I have this person in my head screaming at me because I don't feel like I deserve to be happy. I am always angry, even when I have nothing to be angry about. I am alive and she gave up, and that sits with me all day, every day.A year ago my three year relationship ended. It hurt don't get me wrong, but I constantly found myself questioning my feelings and if what I felt was even love. Some days I would look at my partner and I felt nothing, I would spend days numb to any positive emotion. My depression comes in tidal waves, it fills me with dread, doubt, paranoia and self loathing. It crashes into my life and often destroys the relationships I have built up around me. I feel like I sabotage myself, and I set myself up to fail. It feels like I am caught in a rip, and no matter what I do, I can't get back to land. I have been particularly bad of late, I feel like I am going a little insane. I have avoided all social events, even those with my closest friends. I rarely leave my room, I just sit there content with not moving. Yesterday I told someone about how I feel and today I feel better for it. I might not have gone into detail, but I said enough. I haven't been hit by a wave today, I think I even smiled. . Sometimes the smallest of conversations can make the biggest difference. Today was a good day

white knight Why I cried today
  • replies: 3

It's been a week or more since the build up began. I could feel it coming. That welling in my eyes as if Niagra Falls was on the brink but it wasnt coming until this morning. Compassion. It's a strong word. It is, in my world at least, essential to m... View more

It's been a week or more since the build up began. I could feel it coming. That welling in my eyes as if Niagra Falls was on the brink but it wasnt coming until this morning. Compassion. It's a strong word. It is, in my world at least, essential to my character. I'm not boasting, I'm relating. To you, yes you that is reading this. I've been on this forum for 6 months and I, for once feel safe. A place we can share and be compassionate understanding and grateful. This place is so valuable money cannot buy its replacement. There is no room for criticism of this place. If it comes it is due to the very few that have their own issues with coping that cannot read our stories of pain. So they need help from elsewhere. Recently we had a regular dear member that lost his close mum and then there is all the funeral arrangements that would drain and test any of us. There has been some brave new posts one of which comes to my mind "think b4 you act"....how amazing as he faces his umpteenth operation to repair damage to his body. There are long term posters struggling to keep their heads above water even after more than 500 posts but they hang in there asking, learning and then, the most important thing....putting advice into action. And there are the young posters lately that have taken my breath away with their honesty and maturity beyond their years. Some as young as 15yo that are not even adults. Well done. I salute those here that give advice to others, yet if we all knew their own life's history we would be astounded how they have come to a point whereby they can give help to others. Simply amazing. This forum is about more than support . It's about sharing between equals. Equals? Yes, we are all equals. A seemingly small issue for one person can be near the end of their world. So we cannot judge what is major and what is not. For that person with the 'small' issue could very well manifest into a life struggle. Or they could turn into a great adviser here. Each of us is valued. Each of us is a link in a recovery chain. More than support, this site is growth by learning, strength by reaching out and a service by listening. So I figured out why I cried this morning. It wasnt a long cry but a short one. I cried because I'm happy. I have a home here.

Muttley Knocking down the brick wall
  • replies: 2

I am after some advice. I have built a brick wall around myself in regards to my anxiety an depression. I realise I need help and am seeing a psychologist as well as being on medication. I have only just started to see the psychologist and I am scare... View more

I am after some advice. I have built a brick wall around myself in regards to my anxiety an depression. I realise I need help and am seeing a psychologist as well as being on medication. I have only just started to see the psychologist and I am scared that he won't want to help me if I keep the brick wall up. I was abused as a child (sexually and verbally) and built the wall to protect myself. How can I take the wall down so that the real me will shine and I can get my self esteem back? Thanks.

MyahLove1 Music is my saviour
  • replies: 3

Like i said previously, this is my first time here and if i'm posting to much I apologise. I was just wondering if others felt like music was their saviour? It doesn't matter what genre, what artist or what band? But does it feel like music takes you... View more

Like i said previously, this is my first time here and if i'm posting to much I apologise. I was just wondering if others felt like music was their saviour? It doesn't matter what genre, what artist or what band? But does it feel like music takes you away to another place where the depression can't get you?? x

B_rad71 I didn't believe it but things can get better.
  • replies: 2

I know its been a long time since i last posted. I was in a bad place. And i didn't know how to get out of it. So i did what i thought i would never do. I reached out to my GP. With his help i managed to see a phycologist and eventually a psychiatris... View more

I know its been a long time since i last posted. I was in a bad place. And i didn't know how to get out of it. So i did what i thought i would never do. I reached out to my GP. With his help i managed to see a phycologist and eventually a psychiatrist. I started on some medication which has transformed my depression from a crippling disease of my mind to a small blip on my personal radar. Dont get me wrong. Im not cured of this illness. But im so much better. I followed peoples advice. Grace gave me inspiration to visit the NGV which i did. I took my camera back out and started taking photos again. I got away in my campervan to Lorne a couple of times and enjoyed being close to the beach and close to nature. And i tried to rediscover myself. And for the most part i was fairly successful. So yeah i still have doubts. And i still fear that night that i dont get any sleep and then i slip back into that depression. But its been about 3 months or a bit more now and i havent reached that place again. I will admit, i do think that day will come, im still scared of it. Im still not ready to reach out for help dealing with the abuse i suffered. Thats a pain that needs to wait a bit longer. But i know now that things can get better. I have been able to reconnect with a couple of people in my life. And with my work. And most importantly, with myself. So for anyone who is at rock bottom, or getting close to it, keep this in mind. Things can better. Things can change. And people can change. If you dont know what else to do or where to turn, then find at least one person, GP, friend or family. Even this forum. And make that your starting place. If you dont reach out, you will never grasp that hand that is waiting to help you up. I know for many people it seems just out of reach. Always out of reach. But once you grasp it, it can pick you up. Thanks to the forum and its supporters for your king words and support and suggestions. Although i didnt post i still followed along. Take care everyone.

white knight Ostracised? whos fault is it?
  • replies: 16

I love clarity. Clarity leads to understanding leading to peace and progress. I've long wanted clarity in my world of being ostracised. Three auto clubs in 25 years and all three end up ostracising me from their cliques that resemble predator vulture... View more

I love clarity. Clarity leads to understanding leading to peace and progress. I've long wanted clarity in my world of being ostracised. Three auto clubs in 25 years and all three end up ostracising me from their cliques that resemble predator vultures on a beach of insanity. Who's fault is this? Based on the obvious that many of us have extreme behaviour in that some of our actions and words are outside the normal range of commoners we are seen as different, weird and many actions/words, as they originate from our own decisions there is someone that is obvious to blame- us. Clubs rely on character. "Joe is a top bloke because he's funny", "Mary is wonderful because she always cooks a slice and is the quiet type". "Tony is a trouble maker, always finding conflict". They often bandy around the word "family" to describe their group only to find at the cemetery gates who their real friends are. And that leads me to a point. We the extreme ones have good points. We are usually extreme where it matters, kindness, compassion, loyalty. Whereas our toxicity is seen as- no fun to be with,weird,trouble maker,confused,quiet type or rowdy not in between,always talking about illness, meds and treatment.Clearly the negatives in many eyes outweigh the positives. Who's fault is it? Well based on the phrase "forgive them for they dont know what they do" the masses can be forgiven IMO. Yes, most dont want to make effort to understand, accept and support us. It's too much work when all they want to do is have fun. A physical injury/disability of a member is in their face, they can easily and wantingly assist. But mental issues are too hard. Forgive them, yes we can, it isnt easy but it is the only way to move along in our word filled with enough troubles for us to balance in our daily lives. What about us? If they are not to blame then we are to blame? We are to blame for inheriting an illness?Also for odd behaviour? And for our illness that engulfs us so much that we cannot stop mentioning it? We are to blame for our childhood? It's all our fault surely? No it isnt. We are not at fault. We are not one of "them" that fit in.And the harder you try to get in that inner core of popularity the worse the problem gets.You can sneek in though,if you are the very quiet type, speak little and smile a lot. I have a good friend that does that and he has deep depression.Members of two clubs. So clarity of this is now clear. No one at fault. And forgive them for "they dont know what they do."

renmon What's right with us all - sharing our greatest stengths and what is valuable about each of us
  • replies: 4

Hi everyone, It's clear from this forum that we are all struggling with our own battle against mental illness and life in general. I find it difficult to read some of the messages on here at times and would love to share what is going right in our li... View more

Hi everyone, It's clear from this forum that we are all struggling with our own battle against mental illness and life in general. I find it difficult to read some of the messages on here at times and would love to share what is going right in our lives despite all the pain we are in. I hope that this would also help us all to remember that life is ever changing and what feels unbearable at one time will not last forever. Please join me in sharing what you really like and love about yourself and the wins you are having in your life. Even if you don't want to share, you might read this and have a very small mental shift away from the dark thoughts and feelings you have. What's right in my life? I have two amazing children who are incredibly bright and emotionally resilient beyond their years, thanks a lot to sharing my experiences with them and them seeing you can live well despite feeling terrible at times. My friends and family take strength from seeing me get through the difficult periods of battling my depression and anxiety. Somehow I can always maintain a sense of humour through anything, including laughing at myself when I'm really unwell. Sometimes I have to give in to the way I feel, but I never give up and that is a huge achievement. Today I cleaned my house and got my children to school on time and I ate breakfast and lunch. So today was a big win for me. Every day I manage to continue breathing is a win for me. I look forward to hearing what is wonderful about each of you and what happened in your day that felt right. Even if it is something as small as you felt a beautiful breeze or a ray of sunshine or you decided to live another day. Wishing you all loving kindness.

Violet_Eyes I will be respectful towards those who are trying to help me
  • replies: 3

Dear Violet Diary, my day started strangely sluggish. It took me along time to wake up, by saying that I was awake but my body felt exhausted for no apparent reason. I dragged myself out of bed at around 8:30ish but I just felt tired, I laid thinking... View more

Dear Violet Diary, my day started strangely sluggish. It took me along time to wake up, by saying that I was awake but my body felt exhausted for no apparent reason. I dragged myself out of bed at around 8:30ish but I just felt tired, I laid thinking..Wtake up! I had a coffee with my two sisters who were nice for a change, no hip hop hooray but it was nice the tension was not in the air, I knew I had a lot to do so I tried to cope without taking any medication.I lasted until about 12ish then bang I was on fire, my family knew it because they see the change from myself not taking pills to taking pills.I went into productive mode & super cleaned the house,super cleaned myself & had my friend pick me up. I'm going to a mental health program tomorrow for the first time & I don't know what or how I should feel, I'm going hungover, drunk anyway. I know that's not the appropriate way to induct myself but I don't care....I obviously will be respectful towards those who are trying to help me.