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Sophie_M Sleep and Mental Health
  • replies: 0

Many of us have struggled with bouts of troubled sleep, and needless to say, these periods of nocturnal restlessness can be utterly overwhelming and exhausting. Sleeplessness can filter into every aspect of our lives: our ability to be present, remem... View more

Many of us have struggled with bouts of troubled sleep, and needless to say, these periods of nocturnal restlessness can be utterly overwhelming and exhausting. Sleeplessness can filter into every aspect of our lives: our ability to be present, remember things, regulate our emotions, or to feel excited and energised… it can change the way we think and feel in such a significant and impactful way. Whether it’s due to big life changes, global pandemics, financial or work stressors, health concerns (like menopause), how much ‘you’ time you have, or even unprocessed emotions you weren’t aware were there – so many things can impact how you sleep. All of this goes to show that not only do your daily habits, routines, and experiences play a huge role in maintaining healthy sleep cycles, but so does your mental health. And frustratingly enough, your sleep also impacts and informs your mental health and daily habits. Like most things, it’s a very easy cycle to fall into. So, it’s imperative that we are gentle and compassionate with ourselves on our journey to understanding what is making us so hypervigilant and unable to rest in the first place. Studies show that journaling or mindfulness practices throughout the day, healthy food, movement, sunshine, connection with loved ones, and support from health professionals can help us to feel more grounded and able to rest. But we are curious… what has worked for you? When do you notice that your sleep is most affected vs. when you get the best rest? And is there a way you could practice regulating your nervous system more throughout the day to help promote better sleep at night? We would love to hear your thoughts! Let us know if you have any questions and be sure to check out our page on ‘Sleep and Mental Health’ for more guidance and insight into a more supported and restful night’s sleep: Sleep and mental health - Beyond Blue - Beyond Blue Looking forward to hearing from you! Kind regards, Sophie M

Just Sara A Bouquet for Pearls - share your appreciation for other members
  • replies: 715

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful word... View more

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful words. I hope this thread stays active through members giving out praise regularly to people they feel deserving, and therefore keep generosity of spirit alive within the pages of BeyondBlue Forum. My bunch of Red Roses (my choice) goes to Wishful for the following sentence; 'Personally, I see no reason to be praised in me, but I'm learning that seeing through the eyes of others can be more accurate!!' I so hear you Wishful. Just beautiful... Try to keep your leading comments short to focus on 'their' words. Choose specific flowers (or a gift if you like) to present to them. Sign off respectfully and sincerely. I hope this takes off... Spreading the love...Sara

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white knight Humility, the greatest gift
  • replies: 5

I'm a talker. I was told that at a young age. And I'm still a talker but with less words. I'm not religious but on the odd occasion I like to refer to the bible simply because it contains wise words. “God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the hum... View more

I'm a talker. I was told that at a young age. And I'm still a talker but with less words. I'm not religious but on the odd occasion I like to refer to the bible simply because it contains wise words. “God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble.” and "Humility comes before honour". Wow, what strong meanings. One member, community champion of this forum if "Geoff" with over 5700 posts over many years. Yet his humility is ever so present, his advice oh so full of wisdom. Someone to aspire to be like. Here we are in our society with our personal mental struggles trying to survive or in the least, manage our issues to enable us to live day to day in the most consistent way possible. Yet some members post here with their issues yet are likely very good people that volunteer in positions, donate their time to helping others. Why is it that members here struggling daily STILL find the time and energy to help others? And whats more- are humble about it. To be a good person doesn't mean you need to donate such time. Simply being a good person is more than enough. Going to the rescue of a person in distress, helping an elderly neighbour or checking up on them, comforting others when there is a family tragedy.....all are actions of good people. If you are such a person then there is every reason to be proud, every reason to use your good attitude as a confidence booster if you have low self esteem. If you have been verbally trodden on in the past by a partner or family member then you'll need to raise yourself to make the journey back to how your were, to seek a strategy towards recovery. To be confident again. There is nothing wrong with staring into a mirror and telling yourself "I am a good man, I help others, I am worthy of love and can love others, I am valued by society...". I did this after 11 years of verbal abuse or abuse by silence (just as hurtful) and in 1996 when my first marriage ended, in my new abode a 10 ft caravan in a caravan park, I did just that. I told myself I was worthy...and I was. And I did find love and companionship, I succeeded. I believed in "me" again. It's important to repair fractured self esteem. Then once repaired humility is certainly something to aim for. Humility has inner glory, self satisfaction that you are returning to society some goodwill. It's powerful, its satisfying and its an insurance against anyone willing to bring you down with undue criticism. Your thoughts? Tony WK

white knight The benefit of the doubt
  • replies: 2

We go about our business daily. We make judgements from observations and hearing of others. How often do we get our initial judgements wrong? Making an error of judgement can cause conflict, in turn anger, guilt and enemies. We can do with less confl... View more

We go about our business daily. We make judgements from observations and hearing of others. How often do we get our initial judgements wrong? Making an error of judgement can cause conflict, in turn anger, guilt and enemies. We can do with less conflict. I entered a doctors surgery today. My hearing is impaired but it is damaged in a way that a hearing aid would not help. The lady behind the counter was speaking on the phone and said "yes you'll have to fill some forms in". I thought she was talking to the person on the phone. Anyway this mismatch of communication followed on. Eventually I took the forms, filled them out and returned to the counter. I apologized for misunderstanding her and explained my hearing problem. She accepted it gratiously then admitted that she also has partial deafness hence she couldn't hear me fully either. Ten years ago I likely would have lost my temper. Since a decade ago I've come to the realisation that most people mean well, have issues physically, emotionally or with communication that effects their dealings with others. That alone is justification to give others the benefit if the doubt. I want to mention men. In 1973 I was trained as a recruit by a ex Vietnam veteran. He was tough, ruthless and brave. But fastrack 43 years with working with other men and I know in most cases (not all) there is an emotional and insecure side to men. Some will never show it, others will display snippets but its there. The problem is, these men can also do a great job of hiding it at a time when conflict arrives. They sound fearless, are prepared for physical fighting and certainly won't show emotion. But with the right techniques of quietly speaking, support and effectively tapping into their inner self, one can reverse his lion like behaviour. But its a fine line. What I'm eluding to is there is often a window of opportunity with people, men and women, whereby one can defuse conflict. Other techniques come to mind like separation (with domestic violence a police tactic is to separate both parties to interview and diffuse). Offering a drink to divert attention and so on. The message however is that things are sometimes not as they seem. An angry man can be threatening, physically violent or verbally abusive. While none of that behaviour is acceptable there could be a desperate, frightened or depressed soul inside. Giving the benefit of the doubt that they need help allows an extra chance at a peaceful ending... Tony WK

white knight There is a flip side
  • replies: 2

"There is a positive to every negative in life" Those words yelled at me and ten other insurance salespersons in 1982 changed my life forever. It took a while to fully convince myself of Bills words of motivation. After all, how can you find positive... View more

"There is a positive to every negative in life" Those words yelled at me and ten other insurance salespersons in 1982 changed my life forever. It took a while to fully convince myself of Bills words of motivation. After all, how can you find positives in the death if a loved one? But the death if a loved one is a fact of life, not an event within our daily lives where choices can be made. Practice makes perfect. 34 years later a couple if weeks ago in tropical heat my wife and I had a tough time in our tiny caravan in the tropics waiting for our car to be fixed. Google Topic: great expectations- beyondblue Hands over my face totally distraught at being abandoned by our travelling friends I found it really hard to find positives. So I searched for some. I'm always one to promote a change of environment to spark some hope. I met "Patrick" an indigenous fellow sitting on a naturestrip. He told me about his elders, the original owners of the land I stood. I offered appreciation for his elders, my respect then returned to our van. Had I not been so distraught and in desperation left the van at that time, I would not have met that amazing man. There was the positive. You lose your best friend? Find the positive. Whether it leads to finding another or even if you extend your love to them in the hope they are happier moving on, best wishes can lead to a reunion not so far down the road of time. A well walked track left intact is better left as it is than bulldozed by feelings of rejection. As often sad and depressed people our challenges are far greater than what's common. So we need to dig deeper, we need to keep a lot more faith in ourselves because at the time when in despair there seems to be none around. Despair feels like it will be never ending. Like we won't come out of it. I still have that feeling when deeply upset. A note in the clear plastic part of my wallet states - "it does get better". Better to remember a burst of sun arriving than the rain falling. Once you have become a positive thinker you never revert back. What's more you can pick a negative thinker every time because you no longer think that way. Furthermore you know you have little hope of changing people to become positive, it has to come from within, prompting helps like what Bill did for me but the rest was up to me. Bill planted my seed. That seed became an old tree. That old tree is aging, a negative...but its dropped many other seeds.... Tony WK

NicoleP Running
  • replies: 47

Just wanted to share one way I have dealt with my anxiety - running. I had a rotten day at work yesterday with my nemesis being her normal self. Anyhow, rather than letting her ruin my evening, I went and did what I often to - I went for a run. Put o... View more

Just wanted to share one way I have dealt with my anxiety - running. I had a rotten day at work yesterday with my nemesis being her normal self. Anyhow, rather than letting her ruin my evening, I went and did what I often to - I went for a run. Put on the headphones and got out onto our local cycling paths along the river and ran. 14km later I felt much better. Running has become a huge part of my life. I decided at 41 to take up running to help manage my anxiety -decided that I would do a marathon (42km). I am now 48 years old and I am signed up to do marathon number 23 in 2 weeks time. Running is one thing that I use to manage myself and it has the added benefit of helping tire me out and helps me to get a good nights sleep. Often I look at what my anxiety has cost me, but it got me running and I have gained a lot from that - physical fitness, friendships, sense of achievement. It has also enabled me to see some pretty beautiful parts of Victoria that I would not have taken the time to see. Just wanted to share this because it is something that has helped me so much and I would like to inspire people to get out there and give it a go.

blondguy When Is The Last Time You Have Done a Good Deed?
  • replies: 34

Hey Everyone and New Posters too! I have had Depression and GAD since 1983. I am fortunate to have a crackerjack GP and Psychologist to help me help myself. I live opposite a nature reserve and noticed the local council guys doing major pruning of no... View more

Hey Everyone and New Posters too! I have had Depression and GAD since 1983. I am fortunate to have a crackerjack GP and Psychologist to help me help myself. I live opposite a nature reserve and noticed the local council guys doing major pruning of non indigenous plants/trees with chainsaws and shovels..Even though they get paid for it I went across with Ice Cold bottled water and Pepsi Max cans in a bucket of ice just to thank them for their hard work and caring for this beautiful reserve. I met two new wonderful people that were actually fully qualified Horticulturalists.. They were over the moon with ice cold drinks :-).My depression vaporised after I thanked them and walked away. I was just thinking if anyone else has done a good deed to a person and felt really good about doing so? Kind Thoughts Paul

ci How do we get past the stigma??
  • replies: 19

I have grown up around mental health issues, have had and still having my own battles as well. After a recent incident sadly one family member negatively discussing about another who sufferers with mental health I am left feeling utterly disappointed... View more

I have grown up around mental health issues, have had and still having my own battles as well. After a recent incident sadly one family member negatively discussing about another who sufferers with mental health I am left feeling utterly disappointed in people's lack of compassion and understanding. Please don't get me wrong there are people out there that do understand I am currently studying community service and passionately want to aim my skills at mental heath. I'm writing this thread to ask the question how do we remove the stigma how do you think we can educate people to understand that like any other health issue mental health is real and not a personality quirk! It's so easy to have compassion for someone physically unwell but we find it hard to understand that our brains can have problems to. Even though it's the most complex part of our body. I want to help change this!

daveaustralia1 how music has changed my life
  • replies: 2

I am 36 years of age, a self confessed loner and diagnosed for 22 years with depression and the anxieties that come with the illness. Previously I had anger management issues, always tense, always angry (and sometimes it catches up to me still) and a... View more

I am 36 years of age, a self confessed loner and diagnosed for 22 years with depression and the anxieties that come with the illness. Previously I had anger management issues, always tense, always angry (and sometimes it catches up to me still) and aggressive. I suffer some of these still but since the power of music came into my life, i see things differently. I listen to commercial radio FM for my relaxation, AM when I want to have an argument with myself or am moody and disagree with the world and use Classical with the joys of cleaning and household chores. Together they are my master of happiness. And its free! I have tried psychologists who have helped me, meds that make me gain weight or nausea, or clubs to try and wrestle gains in friendships all to no avail but music is always there to keep me sane. Everyone has different tastes, and it doesn't generally discriminate (sometimes the words are a bit nasty). The only downside to music is; as much as I think I am an Australian Idol, I am not. My karaoke career won't be taking off anytime soon. What I am putting out there is; yes I am a loner, yes I suck at friendships, yes I hate my life in parts, yes I wish I did things differently, yes I blame others for the way I turned out but sometimes in life, life itself offers you a path that can balance things and for me, its music.

Egg_Head Help with sleep needed
  • replies: 15

Hi fellow member, I'm in the 60 plus age group and have had chronic depression and anxiety for over ten years now, whilst my symptoms are mostly under control with medication I do still get anxious at times and stressed out. By far my biggest problem... View more

Hi fellow member, I'm in the 60 plus age group and have had chronic depression and anxiety for over ten years now, whilst my symptoms are mostly under control with medication I do still get anxious at times and stressed out. By far my biggest problem is sleep or rather the inability to get enough of it at night. I get so tired I nap for an hour or more in the afternoon several days a week. I have tried several different types of sleeping medications and although they work I can’t use them long term. I have tried going to bed later so I am more tired and when I wake I try meditation to get back to sleep. Nothing seems to work, I still wake several times during the night and I’m wide awake by 4:00 am most days. I go to bed at 10:00 PM each night and do breathing exercises for half an hour until my wife comes to bed. How much sleep are you getting, is it a deep sleep, do you wake refreshed, do you nap during the day???? Any advice on how to sleep better?

Lind779 Health anxiety. My positive story...
  • replies: 1

Im sure many of you can relate to my story. I have been diagnosed with Health anxiety, all triggered by an operation that had complications almost 4 months ago now. I was extremely sick afterwards with heart pulpitations, no appetite, nausea/vomittin... View more

Im sure many of you can relate to my story. I have been diagnosed with Health anxiety, all triggered by an operation that had complications almost 4 months ago now. I was extremely sick afterwards with heart pulpitations, no appetite, nausea/vomitting, tightness in throat, sweaty palms, tingling in arms. I had every test under the sun but all came back clear. I was told I had anxiety. I thought... no way, it must be something else and couldn't accept it. So I continued asking for more tests just to find that they were all good! The biggest thing for me was accepting this illness. Once I did, I seeked help. How I came to this realisation was a funny thing. I was feeling sick as usual with head in the bucket. My partner started to talk to me about anxiety, reassuring me that it will get better and that the feeling of being sick is all the anxiety. Then... it was like an off switch! I started to feel hungry, stopped feeling sick, tightness in throat disappeared and got energised all within seconds. The rest of the arvo I was bouncing around, eating everything in sight and I was back to my old self. That was the day I realised I had anxiety. Of course I felt sick again when I woke the next morning because my brain was trained that the day was going to be bad, but I had hope now and acceptance. So, the next step for me was to seek medication and a good phychologist. Of course, as most of us experience, was bad side effects from the meds. Higher anxiety, waking up at 4am with panic attacks, every symptom I had was alot higher. The side affects lasted about 2 weeks before I found some relief. I no longer have nausea, eating well, heart pulpitations have decreased and the tight throat have subsided. Im still working on the morning heart pulpitations but they are no way near as bad as they were. This is a work in progress and not an easy fix. I have to learn how to control the anxiety attacks when I fall ill with the simple cold or a virus. I immediately go into fight mode, thinking the worst which develops into an anxiety attack. I have good days and bad days but as long as the good days outweigh the bad, then I'm happy with that and hope the bad days will become less and less over time. Just to sum up what my treatment involves: medication, healthy eating, no alcohol, phychologist, CBT, yoga, meditation, keeping busy, breathing techniques, excercise and positive self talk. I would love to hear your success stories or work in progress stories as well.

Mariasharapovafan1 Healthy diet and exercise
  • replies: 5

Hi, I've following a sensible balanced diet and I started to reduce my junk food intake. Also I'm taking up a lot of physical activity by walking rather than catching the bus. This is very helpful. I'm now monitoring my diet and how much exercise I t... View more

Hi, I've following a sensible balanced diet and I started to reduce my junk food intake. Also I'm taking up a lot of physical activity by walking rather than catching the bus. This is very helpful. I'm now monitoring my diet and how much exercise I take up. Exercise I've heard alleviates depression. I'm slowly jumping out of my comfort zone. I would say well done.