Stuck in a rut

[marley01]

Hi everyone,

I am 25yrs old and I am a lesbian. I feel like I am going to combust of stress and anxiety if I do not talk to someone soon. TBH the reason why i have dragged this out so long is because I didn't want to believe that a past situation effected me as much as it actually has.

My very first partner of 3yrs cheated on me with a male. This has now caused alot of problems. I do not trust any males apart from my Father. I don't have many straight guy friends, I can count them on one hand. Due to this now my current partner of 2.5yrs is aware of my "issue" with straight males. I feel like any male from her work wants to be more than friends and doesn't respect our relationship at all. I can outright say, she does not agree with me and feels I do not trust her which is not the case. I do not trust the boy in the situation. I instantly feel sick in the stomach if a conversation is spoken about of her male co-workers like something funny or if something happen. 

Ontop of that, I am anxious all the time. I have tried breathing exercises etc but I think I need some more tips. If the traffic is bad, running late, messy house etc etc my chest tightens and I get annoyed to the point I cannot shake it off and it ruins my day.

I was recently promoted at work which has caused alot of stress and not believing in myself. Waking up for work is the worst because I dread it, even though its the most amazing job in the world and I LOVE working their.. its just my current mood I can't shake.

HELP! 

[Mares73]

Hi Marley; welcome to Beyond Blue where you will find them most compassionate, understannding, caring & supportive people who will provide as much advice & compassion as they can. Just to get a bit more knowlege-have you experienced depression before because it does sound like you experiencing a episode of depression. They anxiety symptoms you describe are well known to me & many others. It's fear & isolation, doubting yourself, not feeling your usual things you enjoy etc that are just a few symptoms of depression. On this website there is a list of GAS that specialize in depression & have done training from Beyond Blue-you could find a Go from this list near you & I urge you to do this-just say you've been referred by Beyond Blue & they will know immediately that you are there for depression & they would have knowledge of different treatments, medications & support available. I know it takes courage but I can tell you have strength to do this. Also if your interested them Dr gave do you a Medicare plan where you get up to 10 appts with a pyschologist. It's important that you also get support to move past their complex feelings re the cheating & try move on from that experience. It's great that you reached out here- I care & hope if you can just make one step today-you find a GP on that list & ph & make an appointment. It's good insight you have to have To Reach Out here-now can you just take them next step on your journey? Good luck & look forward to hearing back from you. Lve Mares x