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Relapsed feelings from a past relationship

Community Member

Hi i don't normally do this but feel like need to tell someone

My x girlfriend is part of this group of friends I have, we dated a while ago but one day she got really stressed out and broke up with me and proceeded to block me on everything. I didn't see or hear from her for 4 months after which I saw her and we made up, I understand why she did what she did because she got stressed out and I think I was overwhelming which is fine. However recently this group has been hanging out again even since we made up so I've seen her a bit recently I know I still like her, and i'm not sure if she feels the same but similar signs are there from when we dated the first time in terms of her liking me.

This has been very stressful for me and affecting my mentality as I don't mind the fact I like her, its just after I see her I start to overthink things and go into panic attacks and stuff because I'm afraid if I tell her and she doesn't like me back it might ruin the group dynamic.

do you think its justified I still have these feelings as we shared such as strong relationship before? and also why do I start to overthink about her after I see her, Is there something wrong with me? Is it worth me diving in again for another go at this relationship as it was really profound she just got overwhelmed so I think if i did it again I would take it more slowly and be a bit more chill about things.

1 Reply 1

Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni

Hi Sky,

Welcome tot he community here. It certainly does sound like you have confused thoughts about how to proceed with your x girlfriend.

I believe it is only normal to feel this way, you really liked her, you were in a relationship together, things didn't work out and now you are seeing her in this group again. Being in such close proximity would stir up all kinds of emotions and desires.

The only way you are going to know for sure if you have an opportunity to be together again is to ask her.

You may have to consider what a possible NO would meant o you and to the group. Could you stay just as friends and be able to continue on?

Do you have ways of coping when you have the panic attacks? Have you tried some self talk or distraction methods? It can take a while to get a hang of how effective these can be.

Hope you find ways on helping yourself to cope and you also find the courage to talk to this lady and decide what you will do with her response.

Cheers from Dools