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Is it bad that the only person I want to need is myself?

Community Member
I quite often find myself in moments when I'm upset, not reaching out to someone as I don't want them to help me. I worry if I seek comfort from them I will start to need it? I want to be able to comfort and cope by myself! I think I ultimately believe that eventually everyone will either die or just leave me, and I don't want to rely on anyone! I'm not sure where this has stemmed from as no one close to me has ever died or really left me! Still I wonder if this kind of behaviour is healthy and whether it will help me in the future. I worry that all this does is stop me from opening up and trusting others. But again even if trusting others is healthy, why am I so scared to do it? Should I? Or is it better to try to be self reliant?
1 Reply 1

Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni
hi Vicky, an early morning welcome to you.
If you are suffering from any type of mental illness you will go through stages where you may want someone to talk to or times when all you want to do is be by yourself and whether you want to call this healthy only someone who has had depression can understand.
When you are by yourself then you may not trust anyone, but then you will break down feeling as though you need someone, a friend, a family member or your psych that you want to be with, no conversation may happen, just the presence of having someone there is comforting enough.
Being self reliant will only work for a short time because there is so much going around in your mind that you can't comprehend or worse still many problems that you aren't able to understand and what about those hidden problems which you keep pushing away, these are what you need to talk about.
It can be scary trusting people, but these people will finally show you that they want to help you.
Please don't feel lonely, we have all been through our own traumatic period/s from hell and back, so I hope that you can feel comfortable here on this site. Geoff.