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Ex-partner having a family

Guest_342
Community Member

Hello.

I found out my ex-partner (lovely person btw) is expecting a baby with their new partner.

I am happy for them but is this sense of loss and envy, that I'm feeling, normal? How do I come to terms with it and move on?

3 Replies 3

white knight
Community Champion
Community Champion

Hi,

Time, variety, distraction, new love and blessings.

They are the 5 things that come to mind immediately.

  • Time you have no control over. But it's comforting to know that over time things do get better.
  • Variety, keep busy
  • Distraction, even aa jigsaw in a spare room as soon as you b begin thinking about your ex. Sports even barracking for a footy team, friends.
  • New love. Just saying. We humans often forget how bad things were when together!
  • Blessings. Be happy they have found happiness but also envy is normal.
  • TonyWK

missep123
Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni

Hi @Gelati

Firstly I wanted to say that it is so wonderful that you referred to your ex-partner as a lovely person. That is so positive and I'm so glad that you can see them that way!

I really do think that your feelings are normal! It is a change and it is going to take time to 'digest'. From experiences that my friends have told me, through time it becomes to feel more and more normal.

I hope this helps, we are definitely here for you!

jtjt_4862
Valued Contributor
Valued Contributor

Hi Gelati,

Sorry to hear that you're feeling this way. It is possible that you're still grieving from a loss, and it becomes much harder to come to terms with reality if you still maintain contact, or have exposure to their social media. Try and minimize any contact with them or exposure to their social media, and fill your time with hobbies and activities that keeps you occupied and happy. You could even discover new things that you've never done before. You'll start to feel, as you diminish any exposure to your ex, and keep yourself busy, the thoughts of your ex will slowly become just a memory, and eventually the feelings that comes attached with those memories will fade away.

Also, hanging out with friends, or meeting new people can be good for you too. Through meeting new people, you might find yourself a new relationship that'll be better than what you wish you had with your ex.

Hope that helps Gelati, happy to chat more as well.

Jt