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Does anyone ever truly care about anyone else?

Community Member
I've yet to meet a person who stays loyal to me despite my depression and BPD in all my 34 years. My only friend ended our friendship yesterday and said such cruel and hurtful things, basically reinforcing all my fears. "At least I have a life you pathetic loser" "just  die"to name a few. Yeah we're 34 year old women... I never reacted or stooped to her level of basically high school bully behavior, but it still hurts so bad. I reached out to an old friend I lost touch with 8 years ago and she left me on 'read'. I truly believe I am am good friend, I'm always mindful of not saying or doing things that will upset the other person. I go out of my way to show them i care, Yet I just don't get the same in return and it's really getting me down. I am watching my Mum die from cancer and soon I will be an "adult orphan" with no living siblings, as I've already suffered the tragic losses of my Dad and my brother by the time I was 25. No one else I know has suffered such grief but it's like the sadder i get the more I am abandoned by so called friends. I just want one person who supports me, honestly I could die tomorrow and the electricity company would probably find me when they come to disconnect me.
7 Replies 7

Community Member
Internet hates me tok

Community Member

The Internet hates me too

9 hours no replies

Supersad girl,

I have only just seen your reply. Sometimes it takes time to get a reply it doesn't not mean you have done anything it is just one of those things.

Welcome to the internet and thanks for sharing your story. This is caring, supportive and friendly place.

I will post this so you know I have replied then I will continue its my reply.



Your post moved me andI am sorry you have had so much grief and loss in your life and have not got the support you deserve.

To answer your question Does anyone ever truly care about anyone else ?

I believe yes they do. I believe you truly care about your friends but they have not been able to show you the care you want.

Sometimes people are wrapped up in their own world and socnat give support to others.

This forum has many threads and is full of caring people.

You sound like you are a good friend and I am sorry people have treated you like they have.

I think because you have experienced so much loss, of course you would feel very isolated and alone.

I am wondering in your life have you ever had a friend who was supportive. I realise recently you have not had support from friends, but when you were younger have you had that support?

I have only just read your post and I care about you and would like to find out more about you.

Do you have a special interest that you like to do,could be anything that brings you joy?

Take care


Community Champion
Community Champion

Dear Supersadgal~

I'd like to join Quirky in welcoming you here. It is a pity you had to wait for people to come along, however it is not a reflection on you or what you are posting about. In a funny sort of way the delay is caused by care. There are no paid staff here, just people who come in pain, and remain to help others. That of course is not as efficient, but leaves you assured the people that talk with you want to do so.

Your father and brother dying is a terrible thing, and leaves its mark, probably for always. And you are right, if you are sad then some people will move away, they are the ones that want easy, fun, no effort. Finding the difference between friends and acquaintances can be a heart-breaking discovery too.

I suspect when you say you are a good friend you are correct. Friends comes in all shapes and sizes and I'd think you are being as good a friend as you can to your mum. Talking with someone towards the end of their life is difficult, and if there is only you it is doubly so. I've had to be with several that have passed away, my wife, family member, friends. All were different, different attitudes, different expectations. Being a friend in those circumstances stretches patience, love, even ingenuity at times. Plus fatigue.

I found, even though I was consumed wiht grief that I would not have changed being there, of trying.

I'm trotting all this out to show I maybe understand a little of your trials and to put over the idea a surprising number do care. Friendship sneaks up unsought, or so I've found. It is rare, two partners and a couple or three others in a long life. Hard to tell from acquaintanceship until the wheels fall off and genuine help and care is needed. If someone is till there they are a friend.

You sound as if you have been unlucky. The words you repeat come from spiteful people. To be avoided.

I'm unsure what would be a good thing for you to do, perhaps something where you may meet more people - what do you think? Trying to follow one's interests is often a good path, as can be assisting others.

Please do not be put off by delays, it is not always possible here to have a back and forth conversation spanning just a few minutes.

In the meantime why not have browse around and see if others are facing similar situations?


Hi Supersadgal

Im sorry about the long time for you to receive a reply......we are usually pretty quick in getting back

As you see above there has been some wonderful support from posters to you 🙂

Im Paul and have depression/anxiety for 34 years and understand where you are coming from as sometimes its hard to find people that really care for us

Please post back when its convenient for you

My kind thoughts for you supersadgal


Community Member

Hi supersadgirl,

Im not able to reply in such a well thought out manner as the amazing above posters but i just wanted to jump in and say that you are living proof that people really do care because you're one of the ones who do.

It's a real terrible shame that so far you have only crossed paths with unkind people.

It's also really sad that you're friend decided to end your friendship in such a cruel way. But the way you handled it speaks volumes about the type of person you are. Which is mature and strong. I always believe it takes great strength not to let emotions control they way you respond to situations.

For me personally when I'm really down i start feeling like nobody cares about me, that everybody hates me. Once i cried because a friend didn't answer the phone. How ridiculous of me. I also tend to push people away because of these issues i have.

I hope that you find deserving people to share life with and please don't give up on people because there's some truly amazing people hidden in this world such as yourself