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Covid is testing my relationship

Community Member

I live in Melbourne where we are currently in level 4 lockdown and have been in lockdown for the last 5 months.

my partner owns an events business which has been devastated by the restrictions. He has lost alot of money and all his staff. I am also a first time mum with a 7 month old baby.

i am struggling.

my parter has become obsessed with covid. He says there is nothing else to do or talk about. It makes him angry but also seems to give him joy to be so obsessed. He analyses everything in the media and on government websites, makes his own judgements, then rants on social media. It gives him a false sense of control where he has none.

i work in public relations. Ive told him its a bad look for a business owner to rant on social media but he still does it. We end up fighting alot about it. It makes him angry that i dont want him to do it. I told him its like this obsession and his ego are more important to him than me and his son.

he spoke to the gp once about it and it helped but he doesnt want to seek help again.

i love him. I love our family. He is a good man, albeit very passionate and down trodden right now but i dont know how to stop this negativity.

i have an anxiety disorder so i know how to manage my emotions most of the time. Occasionally i crack and let it out which starts a fight. I sometimes bait him but then he cracks and gets angry back. Which causes me to reign it in before the fire rages on to far.

please note he is not abusive towards me or my son. I want to make that clear.

my baby is a terrible sleeper and breast fed so i pretty much havent slept in 7 months.

i dont know if its the situation we are in or if his behaviour should concern me about who he really is in stressful situations. I dont know what I expect to get out of this post. I just needed somewhere to vent...

5 Replies 5

Community Member
I'm no expert and by all means don't have all the answers. But first - good job reaching out. We all need some venting. It's helps putting things down in writing and then bonus if someone can shed some light.

I am also in Melbourne stage 4 and it is unbareable. I have seen a side of my husband that I have been trying to ignore for years. For me it's probably accelerated the fact I need to leave. But that's me.

I won't offe advice that as I don't have any. But I will listen to anymore venting.

Everyone is so pent up in this situation it's very hard not to lash out at the people close to you.

Thank you for your reply. Its tough isnt it? I thought my partner and i were rock solid but i think you put anything in a pressure cooker too long and steam will come out!

i hope you and your husband are able to reach an amicable solution, even if that means separating.

lets hope for the sake of sanity this ends soon and we are able to gain some freedoms back in our lives xxx

Community Member
Aww, im sorry to hear of your situation and I really feel like my partner and our relationship is on the same path. Life is so different now than what it was back in January. I never anticipated this current situation and the impact a lockdown has on people.

I don't have any advice 😞 but will gladly listen and support you.

Thank you so much for your response and im sorry to hear you are experiencing similar problems.

Its too hard to focus on fixing something when youre in the fog of it all. We need these lockdowns to end so we can try get our lives back on track 😞

Valued Contributor
Valued Contributor

Dear Brokenhearted88 and a wave to the others that have joined your thread.

It feels like we need a great big group hug!

Please hang in there if you can in your relationships.
Surviving this will be stories you will tell your grandchildren!

There's no doubt about it this pandemic is changing our world.
The pressure on so many people and couples is unbelievable really.

I am separated from my partner (who's repairing instruments that test for covid in the U.S.) we don't know when we'll see each other again, or sadly if we will, is the honest truth.
We broke up for the first time this year, but couldn't bare to lose each other altogether.
So we became engaged lol.

We are older than all of you I gather.

My eldest daughter's relationship broke up this year and they have children.
It's been really bad for them all.

If you can find ways to cope within yourself, do anything and everything to do that.
I stopped watching the news altogether.
I sought a specialist psychologist and also have a Counsellor.
There are some beautiful free online resources to support you also.

Posting here is a wonderful outlet, keep posting, as you find so many others feeling the same way. We can support each other through this.

I'm a magician when it comes to raising children on virtually nothing.
And they can be so happy just having you around.
They need so few material things but bloom with alot of love and cuddles!
All of my children have grown up to be amazingly wonderful teenagers and young adults.
And they APPRECIATE people and resources.

The Australian Breastfeeding Association was a WONDERFUL network to be involved in.
They have a helpline if you need to talk to someone who knows the challenges of breastfeeding and parenting and relationships.

We will get through this.

Love EM