can’t get over ex

[tbb176]

hi to whoever is reading this...

i haven’t really talked about this to many people but last year in october i dated a boy for like a week and ever since we have been still talking good and meeting up with each other a lot and he started to hit me and make up so many jokes and everytime i go to hit him not in a bad way he would get angry. no matter what i do he doesn’t care. it’s a toxic as relationship but whenever i’m not talking to him or we have had a fight i start to shut down and get depressed and want to give up. i can’t do it and then he would come back to me and i was the happiest but everytime he would leave i hated it. recently he got into a relationship and he doesn’t want anything to do with me. at school we would just walk past each other like strangers and sometimes yell at each other, i miss him so much and i know i need to let go but it’s literally so hard. he’s got me so attached. also when he wants something he always gets it no matter what, he hates it when he doesn’t get his own way all the time. he’s a user. he’s used me so many times and i kept going back to him. i’ve lost so many friends because of him. i’m completely broken because of him and i can’t deal with it anymore

[geoff]

Hello Tbb176, can I welcome you to the forum and many thanks for posting your comment.

If you keep hitting something delicate something you love, such as a little puppy, is it going to come to you when you call it, no, so you've lost, then you can't be hit by this boy and then try and make up jokes, that's certainly a 'no-no'.

He always wants to have the final say and yes there are some happy times but only if he gets his way which can make him be a user, and a person like this would borrow money off you, but never pay it back.

Gain your friends back, get their trust back with you because this boy is only going to use everybody he can in any relationship to get what he wants.

Users can never be a friend because everything only goes one way, their way, and if they pretend to return the favour, it's only for their own benefit.

You will find someone out there who treats you as a lady, forget this other boy, he will drift from r/ship to r/ship, using all of them along the way.

Please look after yourself.

Geoff.

[tbb176]

thank your for your advice.

its honestly been so hard to move on from him when he has me so attached. i always think about him and i cant get him out of my mind. i try to keep myself busy but it never works. he has left me so many times amd everytime he comes running back to me and im dumb enough to take him back because i loved him. and now hes moved on with another girl and its killing me seeing him happy. i dont know how much longer i can take this.

[monkey_magic]

Hi tbb176,

It's really hard to move forward from people that you love but isn't this deception? I feel like this guy is deceiving you. He's hit you and that's not on and you said yourself that it's toxic. I've gotten out of toxic relationships myself and I cried and it was hard and depressing and stressful but if I can do it so can you. It sounds like you don't want to be without him but don't you think it's for the best?

Geoff has given you some really good advice too. Impressive and intelligent.

You should speak to someone about your situation for support. You can ring beyond blue, talk to life line 131114, or even call 1800 respect...you have been given guidance here...if u need more than call the numbers I mentioned.

Good luck and if u need to keep writing to us you are welcome to. I hope you will be OK...

Hun you will be with other, better men that really love you, not hurt you...maybe try going on a date with someone else you like and definitely get to know other guys as friends but don't let this guy know. You should try and become unattached, he sounds like bad news.