Hi guys, this is my first time posting here. I suffer from severe long term depression and anxiety. I have been with my husband for 12 years, married for 5. We are the only partners we have each had. I am 31.
I have been unhappy for many years. I feel like he is a man-child that I am left to mother. Deep down he is a great kindhearted person but I am not satisfied in our marriage - I feel like we have totally grown apart, I cant talk to him about anything (he tends to have a bit of a tantrum if I say things he doesnt feel like dealing with), our sex life has been incredibly lacking for years and now I have totally lost interest, and in general I just dont feel excited or happy to be around him. I feel stressed, frustrated, on edge, anxious when I am at home.
We have tried couples counselling but he wasn't interested, I have tried for years to tell him how unhappy I am and what I need from him but it falls on deaf ears or changes back to how it was after a week or so. I have tried to end the marriage several times but every time I have, he cries, sobs, tells me he can't live without me and guilts me into changing my mind again.
I am scared that my life is just going to pass me by and I am just going to spend it being miserable because I know I am not getting what I need from the relationship. I want to get out but the guilt leaves me feeling trapped, alone and depressed. I am seeing a counsellor but she says I have a long way to go. I guess I am just wondering if anyone may have some advice?
Thank you
