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At Home Dads

Community Member

This thread is dedicated to all At Home Dads that may be struggling with anxiety and depression due to the stresses of family life in our modern world. Struggling with their identity as human beings, finding their place amongst family and friends and dealing with the stigma that surrounds being an At Home Dad in a still genderist society. This thread it is hoped to be a place for such men to talk openly about their experiences and struggles and perhaps give each other support.

My name is At Home Dan, I am 44 years old, I have been an AHD for all of my marriage which will be for 20 years next year. My daughters are two very well adjusted people and are now starting their lives, my wife and I believe we have done a very good job with them, but not without our struggles. It has been very difficult being an At Home Dad in a fairly genderist society, I have been openly mocked by friends and family alike, with most believing that it is the male that needs to work while the wife stays at home with the children. It has left me with absolutely no confidence and at 44 my job prospects are limited, I have been working from home since about 2007 as an ebay seller turning a hobby into at least some money. But none of this is recognised as "actual" work by my family, in-laws have managed to even make my children believe that I have never made a contribution, yet I have done all the things that a "house wife" would have done, cooking, cleaning and looking after the children.

I was diagnosed with GAD with a Chronic Depression about 6 years ago when my marriage was on the rocks and it seemed that the whole thing was going to come undone. This all happened when I started to become popular on the internet with my hobby business, more and more time was spent on this and less on my wife and children...guess I just wanted a little something for myself, some recognition...from somewhere. It was fun while it lasted but I had a choice my family or my hobby business.

During my breakdown and subsequent depression I sought the support of my friends and family and discovered that I had none, I also sought the support of mental health professionals and self-help groups which were great. I sought the help from men's groups and found that they were few and far between and none of them really understood the plight of the At Home Dad. I still suffer from GAD.

I thought I would post this thread and see if there were any other AHDs that may feel the same isolation and loneliness.


1 Reply 1

Community Champion
Community Champion

welcome Dan,

I am not AHD but was AHM for many years. I just want to say well done for doing a wonderful worthwhile thought often thankless job in being AHD.

I am sure dads will relate to your post.

Thanks again for sharing your story with honesty. This is a safe, friendly, caring and supportive place.