This bipolar life
Are your moods are like an elevator with no control buttons? Mine are.
Ground floor ... I feel normal, content, just quietly getting on with ordinary, everyday life, loving my family and friends. This is as it should be. And maybe there's nothing wrong with me after all. Live.
Going up, top floor. Oh look! There's a shiny thing! I want to sing! Let's go buy stuff! Let's have a big party and invite the world! What could possibly go wrong! Woooooo hoooooooo! Play.
Going up (a different day) top floor. What do you mean you don't agree with me! I'm right! Why don't you think like me? Keep up! How can you be so illogical? I'll f-ing shred you if you don't do what I want! Rage.
Going down, lower ground floor. Flat, listless, can't be bothered. Can still function but it's a drag. Cope
Going down, basement. I'm never getting out of bed again. I'm useless, worthless. Total idiot, how could I ever imagine I could do anything, nothing ever goes right because I'm wrong. I'm a burden to everyone. Hide.
Welcome to my bipolar world. It's always been my world, but it's only recently I've seen it for what it is. About 15 years ago I was diagnosed with clinical depression during one of my 'basement' times. I had a lot of lower ground floor times too, on and off, and I kept out of the basement (so I thought) with alcohol. Until that took me into the blackest ever basement with only one obvious way out. Having survived doing something very dangerous I realised I had to stop drinking or I really would die.
I never took much notice of the playful times or the anger, that was just me, I was fun sometimes, and sometimes I was a devastating bitch. Ha! Deal with it people!
Well, yes, but in time the elevator started going up and down too quickly and, as I became more aware and more knowledgeable about mental health I realised this wasn't good. Doctor. Diagnosis. Bipolar 2. Lithium.
So, I've started this thread in the hope that other bipolar folks will join me, to share experiences and strategies. In my 'beginners' understanding, we are different from other fellow travellers of the back dog. While we experience depression as many others on this site do, the hypomanic or manic ups and, for some the rapid cycling that can happen, are experiences unto themselves.
I want to learn more, and I want to share with others. I hope my fellow elevators will join me here.
BTW, it's a ground floor day in my head today! Yay!
training the human brain is a buggar of a thing , I think the saying is- like herding cats. spring has made my brain scatter and I find understanding conversations difficult, people I listen to dont explain things well and I think it is because more and more people are wound up. Inflation is driving us mad!
Sorry I've been absent. Nothing bad. My last comment was deleted and I'm finding this new format almost impossible to navigate.
I saw comments about food!! I've been managing my chronic health concerns using a holistic approach, and you know what? I'm winning 😁
I've been enjoying my own company and learning about all kinds of random things.
My workplace is being shaken up something fierce regarding all the BS over the years. This won't happen overnight though.
I'm getting ready for work so I'll pop back in later today!!!
Hold the cottage and then I will have the cheese and cracker. Mud cake is the ultimate fat and sugar sweet treat. Healthy and go to food that is a hard one. After 5 minutes thinking I am still stuck. When ill my better half gets me Sustagen in a fruit box container from the chemist and they are rather yummy. Good to see wellness in others.
Hi Velvet, welcome back. Great news re chronic health issues in that your winning.Almost 5 months post surgery for me. Walking pain free. Going to hop on bike next week. That will be scary. I am bushed doing anything.i guess I really didn’t grasp when they said major surgery.Anyway if I could stop the comfort eating or possibly accept my weight as is.
Thats excellent Airies!!!! Give us an update on the bike side of thing once you give it a go!!
Quirky = well, mindful eating and mindful exercising.
Food wise I'm ensuring I get good sources of iron, essential fatty acids, B group etc. Vitamin D as well from food, but that's hard. That's sunlight.
Exercising is more varied. Cardio/heavy weights/yoga and incidental exercise.
The food stuff is me balancing my oestrogen/progesterone primarily.
That has a knock on effect regarding MH as well.
V, I’m in awe of what you do and I hope you don’t take that the wrong way. It’s a hard slog doing anything. I don’t think it’s long Covid it’s just that I was bedridden for so long and the follow up baby steps were certainly small.I can see me cycling lots in the future but my weight issues are another matter.
Daylight saving coming up. That will take some getting used to.
Have a good weekend everyone
Asdff how are you doing?