Sad musings

[Peppermintbach]

Hi everyone,

I'm not sure what to say other than I'm just on edge, cranky and sad at the same time. I'm aware of helplines, doctors, mental health plans, mindfulness, CBT, smiling mind app, distractions, doing things we love, etc, etc. I feel as though I've hit a wall...

I know that I want to make some sort of change or changes but I'm unsure of the nature of this change. A general feeling of unease. When you're deeply unhappy but you're not even 100% sure why.

Seriously, this all probably seems kind of vague and I'm not sure what I'm hoping to achieve here, and I know that no one has the answer except for me (whatever that is...throws hands up in frustration).

All I can say is I think life is difficult and often painful. It's the daily, in-between moments that I find the hardest. Sometimes I wonder if brief moments of reprieve is as good as it gets.

Pepper

[quirkywords]

Pepper

It is sad that you have lost faith in a lot of things. Was this all at once?

Or did it happen gradually? I think that sensitive people tend to think more, tend to feel more, and maybe get disillusioned more.

I am very trusting some say naïve so when that trust is lost it does really hurt me and I don't want to trust again.

Thanks for your honesty. Do you find writing about it helps at all?

Thinking of you and hoping you find some answers

Quirky

[Moonstruck]

hello dear Peppermint......I don't think I ever really found out just what is making you so sad. can you tell me? No matter if you can't pinpoint it or explain..no matter at all. I see you have lost faith...in "things"? I hope you don't lose faith in people altogether....even though the human race is so cruel and fathomless...horrible to each other sometimes aren't we? I could never understand what Anne Frank wrote at the end of her diary, after being imprisoned in that cellar hiding from the Nazis...then dying horribly in the Concentration Camp.

Before she was captured, one of the last things she wrote, while looking out at the little piece of sky and clouds that was visible from their attic...was something like "I still believe, that people deep down...are good at heart"

[quirkywords]

Moon

I always found that quote Anne Frank amazing.

This quote is also from the end of her diary.

... and keep trying to find a way to become what I’d like to be and what I could be if… if only there were no other people in the world.

What an interesting concept .

Not sure how you dear pepper would relate to those quotes.

Quirky

[swtpotato]

Hey pep,

I like the idea of being miserable together. Misery shouldn't be something that causes people to withdraw. There is value in misery I think -- somewhere, at least a little bit, or perhaps only in retrospection.

But at the same time I am not sure (about the value of it, not the being together 🙂 ). Perhaps I just like to tell myself that it is useful and that there is reason for it. But sometimes suffering is just suffering. What do you think? (almost a religious kind of question actually - 'everything happens for a reason' ? which really could mean anything).

I'm not sure what I am talking about (very drained atm) I think you can relate.

I am not here too much because I think I get a little overwhelmed as I never know what anyone is talking about, but obviously I'm just overthinking. It is enough to say I care (which I definitely do) and that I am here to give your misery (or whatever you are feeling today) company :).

Since you are into music, I'd like to share a song that resonated with me a lot yesterday. Think full volume throughout the house, motivation to clean everything, while also intensely feeling all the emotions contained within the song: 'This life' by Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros. I like all their music.

Also I love Anne Frank, I was mesmerised by her book when I first read it. Thanks for those quotes.

How has your day been today pep?

m

[startingnew]

Congrats on 1000 posts Peps!

[Cesca1557]

want to second the 1000 post congratulations! just think of all those people you have been there for and helped! makes me feel happy just thinking about it 🙂

here for you

[swtpotato]

Hi pepper,

Thanks for your kind and thoughtful post on my thread.

You are very much appreciated all over the forums.

How have you been going? What are you up to this week?

Congrats on so many posts! Really shows how much effort and consideration you put into helping others and sharing your thoughts.

sending love and good vibes your way...(need my own sign off catchphrase to show i care haha)

m

[startingnew]

Hello my special sis

Iwanted to check in and see how your going?

i hope youve been seeing some butterflies if not will have to get my messengers back out there for you ❤

Im just gently sitting on your shoulder watching out and over you ❤❤

💪💌🕊🕊 (pretend they are butterflies! I spent ages trying to get butterflies on my phone and still no luck!)

[Just Sara]

Hello dear one;

Firstly, congrat's on reaching 1000+ posts. I was sure there were more, you know what I mean. 😄

When I saw your Avatar change I smiled. I remember why it appeared in the first place..

As for this sadness you're experiencing, Opening up old wounds psychologically (with your psych) can be just as painful as if it were a physical scar. Feeling helpless as I do when someone I love becomes distant and hurt, I give what I can. Probably more to appease my helplessness than anything tbh.

I noticed above your beautiful supporters have questioned you about the issue at hand. When the time's right, your words will flow as they have in the past, whether it's venting or pouring your beautiful heart out. I'll always be here to sooth your wounds or shout with enthusiasm.

The personal connection you and I have formed over time is 'enough'. It isn't perfection and that's a pure thing. Please remember this...

Laughter is of course the best medicine. So please bare this in mind while/after I admit my embarrassment.

A little while ago I had a 'mishap' not being able to reach the 'bowl' in time; very shitty situation. lol (Missed it by 'that' much) I was of course mortified and tried to manoeuvre my feet in a way that avoided things worsening.

I began to laugh; the more I laughed, the more unsteady I became. I stepped here and there with my pants at my knee's in all sorts of trouble. I was wearing thongs and jeans! Needless to say there was little I could do to avoid the 'slip and slide'.

I (and the room) was covered in what I can only describe as a chocolate fountain. I continued laughing...hysterically! I looked around to see what I could do. Ha! Pointless! Absolutely, stupendously pointless. HA HA HA

The shower beckoned..

I took one small step (for mankind) then my thong slipped seamlessly over the tiles in a spectacular gliding motion towards the shower. I held my breath as it came to a sudden halt. I didn't topple. Yay!! Giggling, I opened the glass door and carefully moved inch by torturous inch into my little 90cm square of utter relief.

I stood under the shower naked from the waist up. I sang at the top of my lungs while the water ran over my hair and face, an old song from the 70's; "If they could see me now.."

It took an hr to 'put things right'. My home smelled like a garden by the time I flopped on my couch shaking my head in disbelief. Whew...or should I say; Poo!

I love you; I hope you laughed..

Sez xoxox

[startingnew]

As an aged care worker im use to not laughing at that but sorry i really needed that today! Honestly with your character i can just imagine your faces ad tou go through the motions 😉

You just made my day!

Xxoxoxoxo