Hi , i was in a relationship the first after a divorce of a 20 year marriage , i didn't think i would find love again , i meet this lady through some good friends and we started slow seeing each other on weekends , we lived 2 hrs apart .. we found comfort in each other and the time we spent together was the best time i have ever spent with a women , i could watch the grass grow for ever in her company . as time went on the baggage in both our lives came out and instead of dealing with it we just broke up .. she was scared and so was i .. the going our own ways happened so suddenly and i couldn't believe it happened ...approx 10months ago ... we had little contact and got on with our lives ..i whole time feeling very sad i felt a massive loss .. honestly thought we wold spend our lives together .. i speak of the good times now but there were times that her baggage came out and with out an open communication at these times it would be impossible to have a lasting relationship ...no such communication was possible ... and i know us being apart is better ..but i am still so in love with her ...i messaged her a few days ago and showed her pictures of my apartment which i have renovated ..the finished product ..she didn't reply ..i messaged my feelings and she replied with i think you should move on like i have ..i asked her if she was seeing anyone and she said yes ...i had to get myself home and i vomited many times and just put myself to bed ..i am reliving the weekends i said with her and seeing another guy in her life exactly like i was ...i try to reflect to the times that help me understand that it wouldn't have worked between us but my heart is so full of love for her .. its painful and i can't stop crying
Hi Monkey , You put a big smile on my face ..your so nice ...Thanks ..Had a very busy day at work and am just chilling out .. Had a nice walk with the lady friend and a coffee and and a talk we get along well ..i cam away a little excited ...and i had a good day ...busy like i said bit good .. Its funny hey when its good its great and the other side is so shitty ...the balance is what i need ..I just get so excited when things go good ...and people in my life are normal ..its so nice to be out of the disfunction ...( exwife ) and the ex partner when i think how crappy i felt in love ..you know in love and feeling crappy ...its just not right ...So your right I'm going good and the ocean is southing me ...the ice cream is so good ...i just love ice cream but only as a treat ...need to stay fit .. and lean .. Monkey i hope you have a wonderful weekend in every way ...thanks for being a true friend ..
Such a good,solid,positive post. " The balance is what I need". Yep I agree, I think it aligns us to who we are meant to be somehow. It's great when our lives are in balance. " How crappy I felt in love ". Perhaps you have turned a corner and am feeling good and excited about life again, I'm really glad to hear. You sound more confidence and like your life is becoming better. I think there's no point in being in love unless it's good and prosperous.
I like writing to, hearing from, and following your journey!!!
Hi , Tell me whats happening if you like ... Im going ok weekend is starting ok ... i went to the gym this afternoon and to be honest I'm stuffed ..ha ha ...My Daughter graduated today ..she was happy and sad ... They all left the school and hit the beach in their uniforms ..swam for hrs ..They are beautiful kids ... growing up .. Im working tomorrow and have got a date Sunday with my lady friend .. not sure what we will do .. maybe have a lunch together ... Hope you can pull out soon .. seeing a different pospective ..
Thankyou simon, I really need to pull out, and go gym as well to help pull out..I gave up my job and have given up this new one as well...I think I feel dead...was hurting my back too much- repetitive strain & thought couldn't see myself doing it long term like she wanted. I also haven't been payed...great you spending time with your daughter, congrats on her graduation, you must be proud
Hi , i think time is a great healer with grief .. Change in ones self is important , for me i don't want to repeat the unhappiness any more .. seeing your self and where you have come from and the experiences that have been in your life and letting your self off the hook !!! and allowing that love to yourself ...
Hi Monkey , Some thoughts of her came up this weekend but the emotion wasn't so strong , with all that emotion not there i can see what our relationship was like ..or what i felt in it .. I think you said it once... clear skis ...they appear to be a little clearer today .. Just thought i would check in on ya .
