I so lonely 😭 and I am tired of this

[Unicorndogge]

I don’t know how to start this but I am sick and tired of having no one to talk to and nothing to do. I sit at home and just do written jobs. No one even cares if I sit on my own all day.I have tried to talk to people that i went to school with but none of them have even showed any interest, I am so desperate. I cry myself to sleep most nights I can’t sleep because what’s the point. I am good at nothing which makes me un- useful. None of this youth groups can help me and my consular doesn’t know how to help either. I am so scared of what I have become, 20 and I have no friends or job even worse no one likes me. I just think what is the point of living when there is nothing to live for, this is cruel world. If anyone is reading this I am not forcing you to answer but if you do Thankyou very much.

[Gadzooks]

Hi Hayley,

I'm sorry the weekend isn't going well. No one here thinks of you as selfish and we talk here because we want to. We want to help you and ourselves through sharing this space. I think Tayla has said things very well. You help us and we care for you. I hope that you will still reach out here if needed as well as to other supports. I don't really feel like how I used to anymore either, but that doesn't mean that what we are is horrible. It just means we need support, that some days will be better and that we have to keep working on it. I don't know about hope Hayley, but we are here, we accept you and we will support each other. That i think, is worth the effort.

Gadzooks

[Guest_4643]

Hey Hayley, sorry for my kind of slow replies. Went out for lunch although I wasn't that interested.

You're more than welcome for my time. You do fit in, and you're always welcome in these forums. Everything is moderated so if someone is rude then they'll get reported and so forth. It wasn't a mistake at all that you came here, if anything I think that it was a good thing. You were so brave by doing that because I know how hard it is, sitting there with so much anxiety and depression. I was the same, I didn't want to join these forums either but I pushed myself and it's helped me a bit. Including talking with you and everyone else I've spoken to.

You haven't caused any trouble, believe me. You're just saying how you feel and by the sounds of it, you have no support, and I'm so sorry. You're doing the right thing and coming here for help. Believe me that is a huge step even if you don't think so. You're not selfish at all, far from it. You seem like one of the most lovely people to me who really is struggling and really wants to help herself but you don't have much support, and that's exactly how I feel about myself.

You're not selfish at all for thinking about yourself and your needs and seeking help. Self care IS necessary and it's not selfish at all. If people say it is well then screw them because they don't understand they're wrong. Whatever you need to do to try and make yourself feel better, do it, whenever you please. If you'd like to lay in bed all day, do it. It's you that you're looking after, and you're important. We understand that because everyone here does that stuff too. Believe me you're not selfish. You're very polite and brave I think. I mean every word I'm saying, truly.

I'm so sorry that people have used you. I totally understand that and why you have trust issues and all of that. I can relate to that. But you're one of the nicest people I've spoken to not just on here but in general. You're none of those hurtful things people say, NONE of it. You're struggling yourself but you're caring about others too, and that is the opposite of selfish. Take care of yourself.

Do you have a Psychologist or Psychiatrist, or even a Doctor, Hayley, if you don't mind me asking? I know how daunting it can be, but it can help. It's different for everyone - therapy, getting along with professionals, meds, everything.

Please remember that we're always here for you, everybody here, and we'll never judge you. We're worried about you.

Huge love & hugs,

Tayla

[Guest_4643]

Hey Gadzooks.

I completely agree with you, and thank you for supporting Hayley although you're struggling yourself, I'm so sorry that you're having a hard time aswell. Thanks for saying I said things very well. I hope I can help not just Hayley but anyone on these forums, and I apologise if I can't. That's just who I am.

Your words to Hayley were also very kind, true and reassuring. Thank you for that.

Please take care and be safe both of you, and everybody else here. I'm thinking of you both and worried. And no one needs to apologise for that, believe me. That's just me, trying to have a kind heart.

I wish I could give everyone a huge hug and wipe their tears and all of that. But huge hugs and much much love to everybody.

Love,

Tayla xo

[Unicorndogge]

Hi gadzooks

i am sorry your not doing well, thanks for being here. I am listening to jazz, music really helps me feel better. Really the only thing I have got and here.

hayley

[Unicorndogge]

Hi Tayla

thanks for being here once a again, it’s very nice of you. I do have Counsellor but I don’t see her till Tuesday and I have no way of telling her how I feel because I fear of my dads girlfriend knowing after what I read what she said to my counsellor last month. I have no contact to her either. I took meds last year and the year before but I didn’t like what they did to me, I felt like they changed me. I couldn’t feel anything either. It means a lot that both you and gadzooks are here.

hayley

[Guest_4643]

hey Hayley, you're more than welcome for the support. it means a lot to me too that you support me also, so thank you. we'll always be here to support you.

wow that's awful about what your dad's girlfriend did, I'm so sorry. by the sounds of it, it's not someone you would like in your life anyway, she sounds toxic to me. meds are different for everyone as you know, like finding therapists, all of that. have you tried getting another therapist in any way - Psychiatrist, Psychologist, doctor, any of that? I know how daunting it is trust me. but maybe it might be worth looking into? of course I'm not forcing you it's completely all your decision.

Tayla x

[Aaronsis]

HI Hayley

I am so sorry I haven't been here for you this weekend but I am so pleased and so very proud of Tayla and Gadzooks who have been here to chat and to support you.

They have said some wonderful supportive things and they are so very right Hayley, you are worth it, we are here for you and we care very much about you. It is not selfish to want love and attention and affection and to be made to feel special, that is what we crave as humans. You have been getting this very thing, especially for you from the wholeness of Tayla and Gadzooks posts to you, for you and with love. I think that is really special and shows how much they care for you, and I hope you know how much I care too.

This weekend was huge and I was at the tennis, trying to bring awareness to mental health and having some great conversations with people, it has been so very good for me, and hopefully for them and for BB...however it meant I was not here for you, but it just shows that to you also you have other people who care and that is so wonderful.

Huge hugs to you Hayley, to you too Talya and to you Gadzooks xx

Sarah xx

[Unicorndogge]

Hi tayla

i haven’t thought of getting another Counsellor. My dads girlfriend thinks she is doing the right thing, sometimes it’s my fault that I don’t accept the help. Other then that I hope your doing well. I haven’t been sleeping my self.

hayley

[Unicorndogge]

Hi Sarah

don’t feel like you have to check in with me always, I am sure there is other people that need more support then I do, also I am very glad that your helping other people. You are right about tayla and gadzooks being there for me, I have just been so stubborn I didn’t want to see it. I need to learn how to be more positive about things, I also need to learn to accept things.

hayley

[Aaronsis]

Hi Hayley

I am so sorry this weekend has been tough for you and I can hear how fed up you are. I think the time alone has really impacted you this weekend and I am so very sorry. I am so proud that you have kept on talking and you have been here reaching out and that you are trying and that is so wonderful.

I was just thinking, do you think that having a pet would help with your days? someone you can love and have love back, a dog to perhaps walk or a cat to sit with you to cuddle and to chat to? I know that pets provide so much love and comfort and I am wondering if this is something that could be possible for you.

I just also want to remind you that I do care about you so very much, that I don't feel that I have to be here helping you, I want to be here, sure there are always people that are worse off than us, but I am here with you, because I care and I want to help you through this time in your life, which I also want to remind you that this is a time, that it is not always going to be like this Hayley, there is always change, that is the one thing in life that is for sure...it is ever changing.

I am off to do some grocery shopping soon, how very exciting..lol

Huge hugs to you Hayley xx

Hi to you Tayla and to you too Gadzooks, sending my love an hugs to you both as well xxx

Sarah xx