that is your anxiety talking, it is making you think the worst and think negatively. It is making you think of things that most probably will not happen.
Just thought of something, have you ever looked at anxiety relief on you tube? Hearing someone talk while you're alone may be comforting, to hear a voice talk you through it. I did it a few days ago.
When did he say that that? I thought he invited you to go see him recently?
your dad hurts you every time he calls. If you saw him do you think it would be Different?i know he's your dad but I feel he is playing games with you, playing with your emotions. It is possible he feels guilty and taking it out on you, trying to make you feel bad. This is a good topic to discuss with your counsellor as he may have techniques to help you deal with the things he says/does.
I told him I'm not sure when I will go to see him because work is busy and I won't be able to get the time off and he went crazy at me and said if I wasn't going to bother then neither is he and he won't ever talk to me again
You're still learning to deal with it all. Possibly haven't accepted it all in your mind as yet. It's an emotional part of your life. and you've kept it all in till now. I'm wondering if you have ptsd?
You're dad needs to understand you work, just got promoted and can't just take time off to suit him. I think he is just saying things as an empty threat.
Not your fault he left at all. You were a kid, he was an adult making conscious decisions. Don't let him or your anxiety make you think differently.
