Alone..Depressed..Sad..

[Ggrand]

Hi..I'm new here..just need to put my feeling down..no one to talk to makes depression and anxiety so hard...the last 4 days I have either been in bed crying or on the lounge crying..I can't seem to get out of this...I am becoming a prisioner in my own home as its getting progressively difficult to go out.. I have to go out Tuesdays so I do everthing on that day but it's like I'm holding my breathe all day until I get back to the safety of my home then I can let go and that starts the cycle again of spending the next 6 days at home either in bed or on the lounge sad and depressed...I really feel like just giving up.. My husband passed away 4 years on This coming Thursday. My children live 6 hours drive away and have small children so I don't see them that much.Bad mum and grandmum I am on there last visit i was pleased to see them but I just wanted them to go home. I feel so aweful and numb atm..

[Paw Prints]

Hello Grandy,

Oh what a thing to come home too... I can understand you wanting to get your house all clean & de-moused, but please lass don't push too hard and over do it... last thing you need is to hurt yourself.... that includes you wanting to get your mowing done... it is ok to just do it bit by bit over days... or even leave it for a bit.

I have never heard of the bucket trap & had to google it... what a great idea... I don't use poisons because of the risk to wildlife & Woofa... & I struggle to use traps, as they really upset me... the bucket is a much more humane way to deal with them...

How are you going following the meal plans?... You mentioned they were simple, are they nice?

Ok I have to ask... did Kya & Ebony need to be de-moused as well?... knowing how much most dogs (especially boy dogs) like to roll about in smelly stuff... I'm wondering if they needed a bath or were they good girls, avoiding getting the mouse mess in their fur.

I hope the weather is nice enough for you to sit with a cuppa on your verandah & just soak up all of natures loveliness...

Huggily hugs

Paws

[Ggrand]

Hello Deebi👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩, Hanna, Quirky, Tess, Paws and all...🤗.

Thank you all for the welcome home...I am pleased to be home..I understand what they want at the mental Health hospital to be able to be discharged earlier....in saying that I am okay, happy to be with my fur babies and happy to be home...especially now I have a mice free home😁..

Quirky we’ve had this mice plague now for over two months..it’s destroying the farmers crops out this way..which is very sad..they just don’t seem to get a break...most of the corn, wheat, hay etc have been destroyed by mice....I hope you are feeling okay Quirky..

Hanna, I hope they don’t get that far..I know they are in O, so please be careful about closing your car windows when you lock it, and of course the things you touch...I hope little Sam enjoys his ride to O...and his groomer does a nice job clipping him....I am not sure about going back to the op shop as yet..this Tuesday is a long follow up appointment with my Dr...that gives me another week of confusion about my volunteer job..,,

Tess... I felt totally defeated when I first walked into my home..wanted to runaway from what I saw..then after a good cry, decided that I needed to clean it up...or find somewhere else to live...I have no money , but plenty of cleaning stuff..so the cleaning won that debate quite quickly.😁..

Paws..Isn’t the bucket trap a good idea..I done the one with the cardboard lid....A dirty/untidy house can trigger me...(reasons😢)...I need to keep my home clean and tidy for my mh... I sat outside today in the sun on my veranda which felt really good...had a cuppa as well...spotted an eagle circling in the paddock across from me..such a beautiful bird..

Not keeping to the meal plan they gave me..this week it’s just been to hard...I have kept the night time routine they suggested of going to bed between 9.30-10.30pm each night and my alarm is set for 8am...The extra meds make it impossible for me to fight not wanting to sleep...they put me to sleep fairly quickly..

Deebi...If it’s okay I’ll bbl to reply to your post..💚..love and care dear bbff..🦄👼..

Love and hugs everyone...💜🤗..

👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩Grandy..

[demonblaster]

Hey dear bbff 👩‍❤️‍👩 and good people 👋

So glad you got the mice sorted. Wow it's a wonder Mrs nsc didnt consider that. Shame.

So cute you being back with your gorgeouses I bet they were over the moon you too lovely.

Awesome you had a good cry and then rose above Grandz.

That bucket trap sounds good and worked woot.

Darlin you had to get back home in a routine. It'll come later maybe the eating regime. Good you're doing the sleep part well done. Those meds sound like they're doing a good job of sleep.

Hope todays good for you hun and that you all get to sit on the veranda and enjoy nature at its best. When I hear birdies I think of you amongst many thoughts daily dear love. PubAok love and need you so much darlin.

Always 👩‍❤️‍👩💜🐘🕊🤝👀🤗🏑🗯

[Ggrand]

Hi Deebi👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩, and everyone....

Sorry I didn’t get back yesterday...A bit sad today, Betty’s sister passed away this morning..she was fighting cancer and lost her battle this morning...I met her a few times, she used to travel around between Queensland and NSW in a converted bus..She was a beautiful person...I have been at hers this morning trying to comfort her...

My fur girls gave me a beautiful welcome home...I feel guilty when I leave them..poor babies, missed me so much and are following me everywhere....

The meal plan means I need to prepare things and cook each night, no motivation to do that just yet..maybe later I’ll try to...tomorrow is a long appointment with my Dr..I haven’t been out on my own yet, except to Betty’s. Supporter is driving me in for that appointment..I know I have to start going out on my own..but it’s still very hard...I will one day soon, I know I have to push myself to get out..

Today, I had my morning cuppa tea outside..it was so nice to feel the sun on my back....Plenty of Magpies, a few eagles and kookaburras hanging around hunting for mice..

I’m doing okay..trying my best to keep busy, but theirs only so much that we can find to keep us busy...

I hope your days been a good day Deebi and everyone....Autumn is such a beautiful time of year..

Same bbff..pubaok......love and need you as well..💚🧸🤗🌜🦄👼🌛.🌹🕊🌱.

My love, hugs and care everyone...💜🤗🦋

👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩Grandy..

[demonblaster]

Hiya sweety bbff 👩‍❤️‍👩 and readers 👋

Darl I'm sorry hearing of Bettys sister she sounds like a nice person. Dear Betty must be sad. You're a lovely friend Grandy.

Yip in your own time I reckon with the eating plan. There's adjustment going back home I imagine.

Dear little furs following you. Strong love between you sweetyhearts.

How lovely hearing the Magpies best sound aye and Kookaburras are pretty amazing too. Glad you enjoyed your time outside.

No probs whenever you're up to huns posting I know you do when you can. I find it really hard in hard times. Takes an age. You're good.

Yip we've been day sleeping again which is good. 3rd May hun. A bit but not heaps to go now packing.

Big love beautiful friend sss always in my heart and thoughts 👩‍❤️‍👩💜👀🤝🕊🗯🤜😈🤛🦄

[Paw Prints]

Hello Grandy,

Oh that is sad news about Betty's sister... I'm sure she has really appreciated you being there for her.

How sweet your furs following you about like little shadows... hmmm have they been trying the big sad eyes at mum in the hope of getting treats???

Lucky you seeing eagles... there are some about here, but I rarely see them... they are such big birds & I love spotting them.

Hugs

Paws

[quirkywords]

Grandy sorry to hear about bettys sister.

re keeping busy, One can think one can go do too much but is scared to stop incase one overthinks.

What happens when you are not busy..?

[Ggrand]

Hello Deebi👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩, Paws, Quirky and everyone....🤗..

Thank you all for saying about Betty’s sister..

Betty is okay and at work today...She seems to take things as they come and continue on with her life...her sister passed away in Queensland with the rest of her brothers and sisters....She had 11 siblings now it’s 10...she is the oldest...and not going to the funeral as sh is 80 this year and not able to drive all the way up their...

Eagles are beautiful and have to lucky to spot them...I think I have given my furs a months full of treats in the past few days...When they want one they sit in front of the cupboard door the treats are in..They didn’t eat dinner last night so the treats are back to 2 a day from today..

Long appointment today with my Dr,,,lol already got a reminder call this morning to attend....

Quirkey...if I don’t keep busy thoughts start popping into my head...and I start thinking on them...it’s hard to keep myself and my mind busy always, I can’t watch tv because my mind doesn’t stay on what I’m watching...Same with reading....it’s hard to find something that I can fully concentrate on....

5 th Of May..only a couple of weeks away....Please don’t overdo anything...Day sleeping is a good way to rest your thoughts and body...which is good...Love to you my bbff with bear hugs..gentle ones only..💚🧸🤗..pubaok.,yadimh with 💭..

My love and hugs to everyone..💜🤗

👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩Grandy..🕊🌱

[demonblaster]

Hey bbff 👩‍❤️‍👩 and all 👋

Eagles are beautiful intelligent graceful creatures aren't they. You had a nice collection that day of lovely birdies.

Just popping in to see how you are beautiful we bought the gorgeous furs to visit our other beautifuls and of course they want cuddles from you.

You had the extended Dr appt on Tues hoping that went well lovely one.

Thought we'd stay over and I'll cook a lovely roast Lamb yum with crunchy spuds beans burnt Pumpkin carrot mint jelly gravy and anything else your Golden heart desires my precious.

Thought we might do a nice slow walk then we can all sit on the veranda and appreciate natures show.

Sending bulk deep love dear Grandy always 🗯 with 💜 care and healing. You're a beautiful besty 🤗

👩‍❤️‍👩🐘🕊💜👀🤝🦄⚘

[Hanna3]

Hi Grandy hi Deebi,

I hope you are going OK today Grandy. We went to big town with O today, the autumn colours were lovely and it was cold!!! Sam looks and smells lovely now he's all washed and clipped...

Not much news as I am tired out, but wanted to pop by and say I hope you are doing OK... and thinking of you. hugs.