Advice for Seeking Professional Help (Trigger Warning- Sexual Abuse, Self-Harm, and Suicidal Feelings)

[Chloe_M]

Hey guys,

My life at the moment is really complicated, so I'll keep it brief:

• My parents are extremely strict- they don't let me do anything, when my boyfriend (who was also my best friend) broke up with me, they didn't know
• I was touched inappropriately last year by someone who I had known for years (not a family member, a peer)
• I suffered from depression(?) after the breakup for about 5 or so months (I don't have a diagnosis because my parents didn't know)
• I have stopped now, but I had been self-harming for around 2-3 of those months
• A couple of weeks ago, the depression and anxiety was so bad that I wanted to kill myself
• I am always anxious- I have a constant feeling of dread in my stomach
• I have panic attacks frequently that sometimes are for no reason- these involves sweating, shaking, hyperventilating and crying
• I really hate germs and am kind of obsessed with washing my hair and sanitising my hands
• A lot of my 'friends' judge me and some of them bitch behind my back
• I find that my anxiety is not at the front of my mind when I dance or when I am on this forum helping others
• My ex and I are friends again, but some weeks he ghosts me and flirts with random girls, and some weeks he acts like my boyfriend again
• I have only recently 'come out' to my parents about being anxious all the time
• I am going to see the school counsellor on Monday
• My parents are going to take me to a GP and get a referral to see a psychologist

I would like some advice on how to talk to a counsellor/psychologist and some general info about confidentiality and stuff like that.

Thanks guys xx

Chloe_M

[james1]

hi chloe,

My GP never asked me about self harm until I brought it up. Can you ask your mum to stay outside in the waiting room, and for your GP to keep that confidential?

About the diagnosis, I might be wrong but I don't think we have like a super official diagnosis thing in Australia. Your GP will be able to prescribe and also provide letters attesting to your mental illness if that is what you are looking for. I think in America diagnosis is a much more official thing because of insurance, but here it's more just focussed on (I think) practical concerns like medication, support groups etc.

[Chloe_M]

Hi James,

My mum said she is going to come in with me, so its unavoidable.

Thanks for the info about diagnosis's too I understand now. So the doctor could say like, you have depression or anxiety or something.

Have a good day 🙂

[Chloe_M]

Also, does anyone else pull out their hair when they are really depressed? Is this a form of self-harm or is it something else? Just wondering.

[Chloe_M]

Just to add, I also do it when I'm very anxious, like today I was pulling in science but no one told me to stop because my friends weren't there so I just kept pulling out my hair, strand by strand 😔

[startingnew]

Hi Chloe

just catching up on all your posts..

im not sure about your sh and having to tell your mum however i think ( i cant say for sure) if your not in danger they dont have to tell them but since im over 18 its different. sorry not much help there.

with a diagnosis- like James said most focus on your recovery however most will at least tell you what they think you have ie anxiety/depression etc and you can ask them as well if that is what you would like.

With your mum coming in with you, im not sure she will stay the entire session unless its classed as family session. if your uncomfortable with her being there you can have a quiet word with your psych and let them know youd prefer to talk to them yourself without your mum in the room, they can give the indication that they would like to speak to you alone. see how it goes though, you need to feel comfortable yourself and remember its your time in there, not your mums.

i dont pull my hair out but i tend to scratch. to me i dont see it as a form of sh, to me its more of a nervous thing. its happening subconsciously so it kinda just happens. if you notice yourself doing it, try to make a conscious effort to not do that even though itll be hard to do at first. thats also another thing to speak to your psych about as well ok.

perhaps once you learn some more coping strategies, talk out some things wiht your pysch some of these habits will go- or so i hope but like anything it wont be an overnight fix and youll need to work at it overtime.

hugs xox happy to keep chatting to if you as well

[Chloe_M]

Hi starts,

thank you 🤗 My mum is coming to my GP appt. to get a referral to see a psych, not psych appt. sorry that wasn't clear enough.

With the hair pulling thing, I do it unconsciously and consciously. Sometimes I catch myself doing it, other times I have this urge that cannot be 'satisfied' until I pull out a strand of hair. Then that urge goes away and comes back again a bit later. It's very hard to not do it. But I will try. It helps if I wear my hair tied back, it's not long enough to reach fully around my shoulder in front if my face to pull.

Am a bit anxious about today, friends are back today, am also excited but I'm scared too.

Hope you have a good day xx

chloe ❤️

[startingnew]

Morning Chloe

Ihope todays ok for you. Your friends are back today (i think...?) So i hope that helps too

Hugs 💕

[Ggrand]

Hello Chloe,

Im really sorry your feeling a bit anxious yet pleased that you are excited that your friends will be home today..

Once you see your friends I'm fairly certain that your anxiety will disappear and your excitement at seeing them, then talking to them will take over and you will have a great time catching up with what they were up to on their trip..

Chloe, if you become aware that your pulling your hair out, hun try to divert your thoughts onto something more pleasant, if it happens in the classroom while your listening to your teacher talk, maybe you can hold your pencil/pen just to keep your hands doing something...

Good luck with your gp appointment today, please try to voice to your gp, about all that your feeling or thinking, so a proper diagnosis can be made..

Were holding your hand, your not alone, you are cared for here, and we only want the best for you..

Enjoy your day today, and enjoy the return and company of your beautiful friends..

Warm and caring hugs,

Grandy..

[demonblaster]

Hi Chloe love and everyone

I'm sorry you're struggling lovey it's hard isn't it but the good news is a lot of our issues can be controlled with guidance and it sounds like you're on the right track there

So today I hope is a good one for you having your friends back at school will be a boom

I'm also here lovey listening not always posting and see you around the traps and at mine thank you for that too ☺ nice seeing you

All the best with everything sweet heart it's nice having you as part of bb.

Good day I hope lovey 🌹

[Chloe_M]

Hi All,

Grandy sorry my gp appt. isn't today, its Monday, sorry about the mix up.

DB thank you 🙂

I don't have much time, but my day was okay, although had a panic attack 😞 apart from that it was pretty good.

Thanks for the support 🙂

Chloe xx