Hello Tashi
Death and loss are always confronting as DB said. The quote from DB You won't be lonely while you have memories is absolutely true. We do miss the physical presence but we can bring back good memories by talking to each other, looking at photos etc. When you are ready try some of these. It will hurt a little but will help even more.
This is part of a poem and I think it's well known. Here are a couple of lines.
DEATH is nothing at
all. I have only slipped away into the
next room. I am I, and you are you. Whatever we were to each other, that we still are. This is so true. I know they are not hugely helpful at the moment as every moment it seems you are reminded of your dad. It will pass and you will find the truth of that little extract.
I didn't get a chance to say goodbye to my dad as he died in England. It's always been a regret of mine but the quotes above, while I did not know them then, are right and I can bring my dad and my mom to mind. I certainly talk to my mom. I also answer for her because I know what she is going to say. I miss being held by them but I know they would hug me if they were here.
So take heart my dear, you will get through this horrid patch and come out the other side. With a few scars yes, but also with the knowledge that can help another in the same situation. Please be kind to yourself and your mom and accept that grieving and loss are part of life. This loss happened before you expected it.
Hope you will continue posting as long as you need.
Mary
