Hi Alice11,
I hear you loud and clear. I have been in the same situation for a while too.
A few things have helped to keep me going but the best for me has been to do some extra learning.
I enrolled at TAFE in a course I have wanted to do all my life. I haven't gotten a job out of it yet but along the way I got positive feedback and a sense of achievement and it keeps me out of my own head. I am planning on doing a new subject when I finish this one in a related but more employable field.
Bonus: My resume doesn't have a big hole where I was unemployed either because I can say I was studying.
If you need to go on job search, try accessing a Disability Employment Service. They are generally more flexible and easier to speak to which is pretty important when you are getting distressed, depressed and anxious.
Consider taking any kind of work that you can manage. I got a job doing nightfill. It might be considered the bottom of the pile by some but it is active and got me out of the house earning some income. Since I started I have harassed every department for work and can fill about 5 different positions now. Every time I get called I remind myself that I achieved that by my hard work - It is good for the soul.
You can also help yourself by helping others. I found reading in the forums and answering others was good for me too. I think putting my positives into carefully crafted replies helped me focus on them and reminded me that I had something to give.
I hope something in my experiences will resonate with you enough to be useful. Regardless, read some of the other threads and I'm sure you will come across other things that do.
Hang in there. It does get better.
