Unbeliever's Undefined Depression Thread

[Unbeliever]

Ok, so my first thread hit a hiccup.

People were asking me questions, and I was trying to answer them, but by answering them I had to discuss things that were "outside" of the main thread topic and it was causing problems.

I'm not the kind of person that likes to ignore people engaging with me, and continue on as if they were not there. But I was unable to think of a way around it (which for me is a novel experience... albiet a slightly frustrating one).

Hence as you can see by the title I have created a thread that is undefined and therefore not bound or restricted in any way for people to discuss anything and everything their little hearts desire and enables me to respond without having to worry about derailing the topic.

* Note that of course standard BB forum rules still apply... no swearing, insulting other contributers etc etc

I added the word "depression" as the discussion should still basically revolve around the subject of depression/sadness/negative feelings and experiences etc.

However, thoughts, perspectives, alternative POV's, theories, abstract ideas etc on depression are not only welcome... but EXTREMELY encouraged.

And because I put my name on there, I think that should allow people to ask me whatever personal questions and I should be able to respond. So I'll do my best to answer any question directed at me.

It is a bit of an experiment... let's see how it goes.

[Forrest]

Also, unbeliever, I totally relate to your thoughts on people's unhelpful comments. But even if I found my self this moment in a state where the idea of trying to pin down just one example to share was something that didn't put me in danger of getting stuck on a rumination loop, I also appear to have medication kicking in and forcing me to sleep. So I'd better get my booty out of this chair and get horizontal on a mattress. I'll share another time if my life permits me to return!

Take care

-Forrest

[Sophie_M]

Hi everyone,

Just a gentle reminder that we have a limit on the size of posts here on the forums.  

User feedback has told us that long posts are far less likely to be read, and that people can find them intimidating.  This includes posting in multiple parts to try and subvert our character limit.

Our forums are designed for conversation.  Multiple posts on top of each other is more like a speech or a blog.

We have let a number of multiple posts through in this thread, but we'd ask as this conversation develops that you be mindful of our guidelines and stick to making one post at a time to allow others into the conversation and to maximise the chances of your points being read, understood and responded to.

Thanks in advance.

[Forrest]

Thanks for letting me know that Sophie_M. Appologies if I caused any issues. I wasn't aware of this limit as I don't remember anything about it in the rules, and I saw another poster continue their thoughts in a second post elsewhere so I presumed it was ok. I also presumed that since the posts are also moderated that if it wasn't ok it wouldn't be posted. I also hoped that numbering my thoughts would allow them to be easily digestible or skipped through, and that since I named in advance exactly how much I was going to share it either wouldn't be posted or might be easier to skim. If there is a lot to say on a topic is there some other way to get to share all the points? Or is it literally a matter of choosing a small number of thoughts and leaving a topic incomplete? Would it have been ok to share so much simply by waiting for someone else to say something first? I mean no disrespect by my questions. I simply want to know how to handle it correctly in the future if I have a lot of thoughts that there are not space for.

[Unbeliever]

I also apologise, I obviously missed that rule in the guidelines as well and I certainly did not intend to subvert anything.

I am trying to stick within the forum guidelines, and still be "me". I assure you that all have been genuine unintentional accidents in regards to hitting so many breaches the last 3 days. I'm certainly not trying to cause headaches for anyone in any way.

I honestly do apologise and I will endeavour to do better.

[Sophie_M]

Hi Forrest and Unbeliever,

Our suggestion would be that if you are unable to say everything you want to say in a single post, then you are probably trying to say too much all at once.  Consider editing your post down.  2,500 characters is approximately equivalent to a whole typed A4 page, so there should be enough space for you to work with.

Treat threads the same way you would conversations in real life, and try to stick to one point at a time.  There is plenty of time for all points to be made as the conversation develops.

[Unbeliever]

Ouch... In my case I think it is best to perhaps not to treat the forums like I do conversations in real life.

In real world conversations speaking 2500 words on a single point is barely a warm up for me. Way too many variables to consider.

As Woodrow Wilson once said...

“If I am to speak ten minutes, I need a week for preparation. If fifteen minutes, three days. If half an hour, two days... if an hour, I am ready now.”

I do get your point though. I'll just have to concentrate on not doing what comes to me naturally.

[Forrest]

I hear what you're saying. I do feel that the partiular question I was trying to answer was a really big question, and it seemed negligent to try to address it with a less than comprehensive answer. I also feel that the analysis that leads to the idea that I am trying to "say too much all at once" could be based on a rather limted perception on how conversations work. My head is full of a lot, and this IS how conversations work for me. Not to mention the way my ability to express myself can be fleeting so I tend to try to get my thoughts out while I can. However, if this is a limitation that comes with this forum I will respect it. I do understand that a system has to encompass the needs of the many. In fact I was just writing about that in point (2) (b) above. And on the flip side I do know what it's like to be the one trying to consider a bunch of people at once and know how to care for all of them. Thanks for your patience.

[Forrest]

I can totally relate to that Unbeliever. I was just saying the exact same thing. Probably at exactly the same time.

[Unbeliever]

^ Hehe. I'm actually a little sad. I genuinely thought I was doing pretty good considering my normal interacting.

I watered down my posts way beyond what I usually feel comfortable doing and I didn't include my own response perspectives to the questions I was putting forth (which I was aching to do) until other people had a chance to think about them themselves.

I actually was feeling a little proud of myself. Oh well.

In the end perspective is everything I suppose. Like always.

[Forrest]

I relate to that too! I also cut my posts way down already (above.)

It doesn't mean you're not doing a good job. It just means that you're very extra extraudinary and it is a painful thing to be.

Unfortunately sometimes system-related results can be black and white and result-based. Like if you stay up all night studying for a test, and you don't answer enough questions correctly. Pass or fail is the system. It doesn't give you credit for your effort. You have to do that part yourself. And find value what you learned by studying and that you also gained practice at studying, even if the result wasn't what's considered acceptable by the system this time around.

Also, I have a lot of thoughts on your other post about poorer areas vs richer ones, but I'm feeling a little deflated about knowing how to appraoch the whole thing now. Plus I have a thing tonight I have to keep getting ready for. But yeah. Just wanted you to know your thoughts weren't ignored.