Trying To Understand How Long Should I Have Off Work??

BornToBeBetter · ‎24-09-2019

Hi, I was diagnosed with clinical depression and anxiety yesterday after going to my HR manager and breaking down in front of her. She promptly got me to contact my GP and make an appointment, he has referred me to see a psychologist, of which the first available appointment isn't until Saturday afternoon. ( The psychologist did say one may come up sooner) My HR manager said take as long as you need of work to help clear your head, my problem is I know how busy it is and feel guilty for taking time off to work through this diagnoses. I know everyone is different in regards to collecting their thoughts and getting back to being functional. Should I feel bad? or just suck it up and go back to work tomorrow and wait to see the psychologist on Saturday or use this time off to try and workout what is going on in my head?

Soberlicious96 · ‎24-09-2019

Dear BornToBeBetter,

Welcome to Beyond Blue and well done for reaching out.

In regards to your question of "Should I feel bad?", I say absolutely NOT! Your mental health is just as important as your physical health and you are a better asset to your company when you are well, then when you are doing poorly.

Have you heard of the term 'ripple effect'? It means that a persons 'mood' or 'temperament' can sometimes be just as 'contagious' (for want of a better description) as a head cold or some other ill-health condition. People can end up walking on egg shells because they don't know how to help. But a Psychologist CAN help, with your thoughts and feelings when they are not going so well, much like a doctor can help with your nose and throat when they are not going so well.

Take the time you need and relax, knowing that your HR manager has got the rest under control.

In the meantime, Beyond Blue is 'open' to you 24/7, so please feel free to post here as much as you like.

Take care. I'll be thinking of you. xo

Alana_H · ‎25-09-2019

Hi Borntobebetter,

This must be a huge thing to go through right now, have you had any experience with depression or anxiety in the past?

I completely agree with Soberlicious, you should treat this as important as a physical illness, if you need rest then take it, your work sounds like they really value you and want you to take the time you need. Also going to see a psychologist is a really proactive first step, so well done for taking steps for your recovery!

Getting the initial diagnosis can be a really tricky time, although you may have been living with the symptoms for a while, once there is a name to it, it can take some time to process. What I would suggest is that you don't put too much pressure on yourself over the next few days, just try and do things that will help relax you, and this is the tricky part... don't feel guilty about it! Doing positive things for yourself when you have a mental illness (or even if you don't) is part of getting better and it doesn't mean you aren't pulling your weight at work, it's part of healing so that you can go on to be a happier, healthier person (/worker) and that is what your work wants too.

I hope you can find someone supportive to chat to over the next few days, try not to isolate yourself. If you cant think of anyone then beyondblue has a 24/7 chat line 1300 22 4636.

I hope you're doing ok and feel free to post back on this forum to let us know how you're doing.

Alana_H

BornToBeBetter · ‎25-09-2019

Thanks Soberlicious96's, really appreciate the perspective. I didn't think about the mental heath being as important as physical but it make a lot of sense. 🙂 I am really looking forward to seeing the psychologist and start working through why I might be feeling this way. I am finding it hard to relax at the moment, but am about to go for a nice drive out of Sydney for a few hours and sit in the sun somewhere and just enjoy nature. It's so nice to know that I am not alone and it means a lot to me!!

BornToBeBetter · ‎25-09-2019

Hi Alana_H, I have had my wife go through depression a number of years ago and come out the other side. But as for me it is all new and scary. I agree that I was probably living with it for quite some time before it finally bubbled to the surface, and now it's real and staring me in the face!!

I am trying not to put to much pressure on myself (Not as easy as I thought LOL) but as mentioned in my other reply a drive to the country should help to start clearing my head.

Both you and Soberlicious96 have given me a great perspective on by working on fixing me has a ripple effect on everyone around me and that is a good thing. 🙂

I did actually go and stay at a good mates place last night (He is older and has been through similar situations.) He is a good sounding board!! and very supportive.

I have always put my work first, but from now on it will be me first, family second and work bringing up the rear!!! Once again I am so glad I joined this forum and have such great soles such as yourself to support me through this journey!!

Wazowski · ‎25-09-2019

Hi BornToBeBetter,

I just read through your posts and everyone else’s responses, and I am so encouraged by your last reply! I agree with everyone else saying that mental health is just as important as physical health, and I’m so glad that you have decided to finally put yourself first. It also sounds like you have people in your life who really care about you, and want to help you through this; your manager who is encouraging you to take time off, your friend who let you stay at their place, and also your wife who has struggled with her own battle with depression. I encourage you to keep leaning on these people for support and spending time in nature (its amazing how some sunshine can make you feel better). We are human, and no one deserves to go through this alone.

I hope the psychologist appointment goes well, and please feel free to keep us updated anytime!

Wazowski