So down so worthless

[Wrenny]

I feel so negative and I feel as though I'm such a waste of a life just spreading negativity aroudn to everyone around me.

I just need somewhere to vent, so sorry if im bringing anyone down too... I'm feeling so worthless..hopeless... does anyone feel that way? It seems like everyone around me has their life together and I've been left behind.

My parents always confirm their regrets for having me. It hurts ofcourse, but I agree with them. Sometimes I wish i weren't born so i didn't have to make them so miserable. I wish I could just vanish into thin air.

The only person I seemed to connect with for a while was my sister, but all of a sudden she's turned her back on me. It feels cold. I feel do lonely. Im connected to do many people on facebook but why do I feel this way. I would consider myself 'normal' in frontof my friends but it just feels so tiring.

I'm rambling. My thoughts are a mess. I'm sure this made no sense. Sorry if you've read through it all. I've just wasted so much of your precious time. Sorry. I just needed someone or something to talk to.

[kanga_brumby]

Hi Wrenny welcome to BB forums. If you need to talk to someone for support call 1300 22 4636. Or you could talk with your GP, and there is always Life Line on 131114. I have found them very helpful. I didn't find it boring reading your story.

Kanga

[BballJ]

Hi Wrenny,

Firstly, welcome to the forums.

You are not troubling us at all by posting here and we are glad you found the forums and wanted to reach out and vent, that is specifically what they are for.. we are people from all walks of life dealing or have dealt with a mental health issue at some point and just here to help and talk things through. My first question is have you thought about or even gone to your local GP to talk about how you are feeling and trying to address it? Perhaps speaking to a psychologist may be needed to start working through some stuff.

I am sorry to hear what your parents have said to you, no child should ever hear that. If you feel you want to explain more of your story please post back as we are more than happy to hear you vent and talk.

Please also remember as kanga_brumby said above you can call the Beyond Blue helpline on 1300 22 4636 24/7 to talk about anything you are feeling.

My best for you,

Jay

[RandR]

Hi Wrenny,

Your post was in no shape a waste of time nor negative.

In fact It helps to read and confirms that we are not alone and the only one's that are suffering from this. I am sorry to hear about what your parents said, having only 1 parent myself after my father abandoned me and my family when I was young teaches you few things in life. Friends to me are very much like family, and it fact had to be in my scenario of former depression.

Regarding feeling worthless and bringing people down, I can say that I have felt that way many times before. It's a hard feeling, one that eats away at you bit by bit. But then I remind myself that i wasn't always that way. That there were many memories of laughter and good times. What are some of your hobbies and passions if you don't mind me asking?

I'd love to chat with you and learn more about you if your open to it?

Here if you need to chat 🙂

Raman.

[geoff]

hello Wrenny, welcome to the site and thank you for posting your comment, because you must feel so alone with the rejection from your parents and now your sister, it must feel awful having no family support, and you're right it is.
Being loved by a family member is slightly different to be in touch with your friends, whether it's on facebook or whether it's face to face, because there are some things you will tell your friends but not your family and vice-versa, so having both are very important for your support.
The reason you are feeling tired and 'consider myself 'normal' in front of my friends' maybe because you are putting on a brave face and pretending to be happy, and if this is the situation then eventually you won't be able to maintain doing this, because it's too exhausting, but before you reach this stage then you should see your doctor.
At the moment you are not strong enough to even tackle your sister and/or parents, but if you do then it's only going to make you feel worse, so just hold off for the time being, and once you get the help you need then you will be strong enough to explain the whole situation to them, and if they still don't accept what you have to say, then there is not much you can do, except to keep in contact when you have to.
Make an appointment with your doctor and don't be afraid about disclosing all of this information, because they have such a large amount of people who are doing exactly the same, so don't be afraid.
You are by no means wasting our time, that's why this site has been set up and I've been doing this for over 12 years or something like that, so your time is also our time. Geoff.