Situational Trigger or Is It Just Who I Am?

[Muckabout]

Nearly 2 years ago my wife left me and she has since divorced me. I had a mental breakdown and spent 6 weeks in various forms of rehab. The last 3 weeks of this was spent at SPP and j came out of there feeling on cloud nine. My wife has completely shut down on me and at no time did she show any care for my situation. My psychiatrist thought I may have Dysthymia, but this week after a lot of soul searching, I have come to realise that I really don't have any interests or things that I am truly passionate and expert about. I also cannot remember the last time I really enjoyed something properly, which leads me to think I have become Anhedonic. It's in my nature to want to know the reason why? My first thoughts are that it might be my medication. Has anybody had any experience with their anti-depressant medication, whilst stabilizing one's mood, perhaps diminishing their ability to see enjoyment in things.

Thanks for taking the time to read my post.

[hope4joy]

Hi muckabout,

Welcome to the forums. And sorry to hear about the difficult time you've had with your marriage. I also had a mental breakdown of sorts about ten years ago when a relationship ended. I'm glad that you're seeking help.

In regards to your question, about whether anti depressants can diminish enjoyment in things, for me they haven't had that effect. I feel like there is a small amount of numbing, or not really numbing but more placing my emotions within a smaller range most of the time, like not such extreme lows. For me this is really helpful. But I can still be sad and cry, and I can still be excited, happy, content etc as well. For me the anti depressants don't make me feel happy - they just take away the real lows - and it is up to me to consistently do positive things/ having a balanced routine to build up the joy and contentedness and happiness again. Do you have many enjoyable things in your life right now? Do you know what makes you happy these days? I find it can change over time.

I wonder what other's thoughts are about the effect of medication on experiencing positive emotions?

Kind wishes, Christina

[Music_Freak]

I've often wondered if this is the case for me, I just can't seem to find much joy in anything these days

If I do, it seems to take effort, it doesn't just happen.

But maybe I am going through a rough patch, I'm not sure I can tell the difference anymore

Sorry, I'm wondering if I'm making any sense now

[White_Rose]

Dear Muckabout

Hello and welcome. Glad you found your way to the Beyond Blue forum. It's an interesting question you have posed. And like many things the answer is not cut and dried. I am presuming you are depressed. Dysthymia simply means chronic, low level depression.

Depression will stop or reduce your enjoyment of those activities that you once enjoyed. That's part of being depressed. Everything is too much effort to do and there is no pleasure in carrying out the activity or the end result. Anhedonia is one of the main symptoms of major depressive disorder. If your psychiatrist has not stated you have MDD it may be you are experiencing the normal lack of interest in things you previously enjoyed, which is experienced by most people with depression.

I understand there is a difference in the two states but not being a psychiatrist I cannot explain what this is. I suggest you discuss this aspect with your psych.

Having no interest in previously enjoyable things as I have said is common in depression. All AD are not alike and neither do they work in the same fashion as each other. If one medication was causing the loss of pleasure in your life then it would be reasonable to try another medication. Again you need to talk with your psych about this.

I have tried quite a number of different antidepressants, all without success. Either they had no effect on my depression or had extremely uncomfortable side effects. But then I also have difficulties with other prescription drugs not associated with depression. And it's highly inconvenient and expensive.

Early this year my GP tried a different class of AD and to my delight it not only worked but had no significant side effects. You cannot imagine my joy. It has certainly played a major part in helping to regain my joy in life. I know when I am feeling particularly down as I lose my usual pleasure in activities. I become easily distressed, lose concentration quickly and feel a sense of great loss. This is depression.

The most difficult action is to take myself back to the sense of joy and pleasure I had before going downhill. I have various tools to use and after a couple of days get back to the real me. I have fought very hard against taking AD but the evidence for me is that I live a better life by taking one tablet a day.

So the answer to your question is that I have found an antidepressant which helps to keep my mood stable and my love of various activities alive and kicking.

Mary

[Pelayn]

Hi All.

I too have had this experience with ADs. My current medication takes away the low lows but im not sure about the highs as i haven't found much enjoyment over the past few months.

Mary that is so great you found the right medication for you. The first AD i tried was wonderful and worked well for about 3 years. I hope to find another like it.

I am still working through my relapse but have had a few curve balls over the last few weeks making it particularly hard.

I just want to get back to the old me but I'm not sure that's possible now after what my therapy has exposed.

Take care all.

[White_Rose]

Hello Pelayn

I think once we have passed through the jaws of the black dog we are never the same again. And that goes for other major events in our lives. Death, divorce, major family rows, even weddings and birthdays have the possibility of being life changing. While I do look back on my life and remember the enjoyable things I find I look more to the present and the future. Though even the future is too nebulous to rely on.

What we have today is what sustains us. I am trying to be in the present as much as possible while acknowledging the past and using my experiences to make a better me. Mind you, I'm not sure I will live long enough to change all the bad habits. Maybe it's the thought that counts.

Muckabout How are you going? I would love to hear from you again. I hope that at least some of the replies have helped you in some way. It's a good place to share your experiences as we never know if, or to what extent, someone has found help through someone else's words.

Mary