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No one seems to understand
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Hi, welcome here
This is a common theme. I often here tell people that 80% of people don't understand mental illness, 10% try but cant, 5% do understand and 5% have one. but they are my figures, it puts it all into perspective. So why don't people understand?
Because it isn't something you can imagine. How can those without a mental illness imagine having one? We can all imagine having a broken leg cant we? But something you cannot see isn't so easy. To top it off, some of us complain every time we are asked "how are you"? we are just honest and tell them "I'm having a bad day today"....they get sick of hearing it mainly because they cannot assist us in our recovery. They don't know that spending 15 minutes with us listening will help us.
Also people like to have a fun life, happy, energetic etc. By associating closely with a person with depression it brings them down.
Don't mistake their negative attitude towards you as not loving you. They indeed do. But some don't have the capacity, patience, endurance to reach out into an area they know nothing about.
Look at it like this- your pen pal you have been writing to in Finland arrives in Australia for a one week visit. You are so excited. Then you meet him at the airport and you find out that he has been writing in English all those letters but he cannot speak a word of English. He has to write in English to speak to you. By the end of the week you are relieved because you can now talk to your family and friends and not write everything down.
Something in life you need to carry on your own. Mental illness is one of them. Expect no one to listen nor understand and if you do then you are lucky...its a bonus.
Tony WK
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Hello Xavsyd. Good on you for reaching out. The negative feelings that over take when you are depressed can be very distructive. It can be true that our loved ones may not understand and there isnt much we can do about that but talk to them. One thing that can help is to tackle the actual thoughts you have and own it as your own perception which is going to be squewed because of your illness. This is what helped me thinking like that as that was me for 20 years. I felt like I was odd, weird and totally alone because no one understood me, the truth is I didn't understand myself and how to change my thinking.
a good psychologist can help you to do that kind of therapy with you. I have seen 17 different therapists in my life with only a few of them actually helping me. If you therapist isn't helping then you should be able to tell them and either find someone else or see if they try a different approach.
Just remember that your loved ones are doing the best they can, try to resent them for not doing what you expect them too and if you feel somerhing, ask them just to check. Trust them and just go on what they tell you as double guessing any intent behind what they say can do your head in.
Good luck, i hope you gwt some relief from this feeling soon and can find some good therapy. 🙂
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