managing highs and lows

[blackholebegone]

In May  I was admitted into hospital with Severe Depression. This was my first ever admission and was discharged after a long hard 9 weeks. Since being home I seem to have some really good days, then suddenly start getting ferlings of sadness, insomnia, and feeling worthless. Workcover is now looking at a return to work project and I am so worried at what will happen when one day I am coping and the next plotting my death. Do others experience these highs and lows, and how do manage day to day. 

[The_Real_David_Charles]

Dear black,

The best way to manage the "highs and lows" is to expect them.  Sounds simple but once you've accepted it's gonna be part of your life for a while then the pressure is off and the healing can begin.    I'm bipolar and often get mood swings - sometimes by the hour.   It's really got to be a long term perspective as overall you are going to try and recover your life rather than worry about the meaningless fluctuations.

9 weeks depression is a relatively small amount of time for a depressive episode.   You might want to work out a strategy if there's a relapse.   I think that even being with Work Cover can have it's good and bad implications.  Take it easy.

Adios, David.

PS  "Plotting my death" is better than "being dead".  You have the advantage.

[blackholebegone]

Thanks David.

The 9 weeks was only the time I spent in hospital, I strugfled at home for a few months, but after an unsuccessful suicide attempt I was admitted into hospital for treatment that was in the middle of April and it has onky been in the last few weeks that I feel more like the old me.

It scares me when I can be doinf well then this overwhelminf darkness overtakea. I cancel meet ups etc and hide at home.

[geoff]

dear Blackholebegone, I know dealing with workcover would make anyone feel depressed, some young inexperienced worker who knows nothing about injuries, and the repercussions that follow, now but more so much later on in life, and they never understand how incapacitated we are down the track.

Can I ask whether you had to take time off work because of your depression, and if so then there are many issues that have to be considered. Geoff.

[blackholebegone]

Hi Geoff, initially I ws off work on WC due to a shoilder injudy, which required surgery. This lead to me becominf dspressed as the sirgery didnt seem to work and when I did try to return to work I didnt cope too well, my depression deepened. WC accepfed it as a secondary illness, have been off work fotr twelve months now. My other shoulder has now forn and will require an operation as well. I had to have a 2nd operation on the other shoulder as it wasnt repaires rom first surgery.so I went from fully employable, savings, cycling for chariy events and getting on with life.To nearly losing everything.

[geoff]

dear Blackholebegone, I'm sorry it must be painful, but there are a couple of issues here.

Firstly have you got any legal advice or some lawyer looking after your case, and if not I think you should, because work cover will do what they want and NOT what suits you.

Everything has to be documented by your yourself, just as a precaution in case your lawyer loses your file, and this can happen.

The other major problem is that way down the track arthritis may set in, I'm sorry to say this, but if the operation has been no good then this will happen, it's already happened to me with my hips.

So your lawyer has to look at your situation in 20 years time, and for any compensation to be built in to your claim, plus they also have to cater for your depression, which is understandable, and your need for counselling.

Hope to hear back from you. Geoff.

[blackholebegone]

Thanks again Geoff

At this stage I haven't even thought about a lawyer etc. Workcover have been very agreeable with surgery, physio and equipement. But now as time drags on and my finances are now gone, it is something I will need to consider.

I do have my documents, emails etc... and as they accepted the claim very quickly including both the secondary depression and problems with my Right arm.

The last few days have been black ones, which my Dr. says will slow become less and less.... I feel I am losing my friends as although supportive it is depressing for them to see me when I am down.

I told a friend I wake each day wishing I hadn't and that I was a burden to everyone, because I didn't answer his phone call he went into overdrive and rang my work colleagues (nurses) to find if they could do something. I am petrified this will affect my return to work.

So I sit and wait, and wonder.

Beth

[geoff]

dear Beth, the whole situation for you must be awful, but I know that workcover for me is much better than the TAC, because with them if you don't submit any additional claim and it's not done by the exact minute or cut off period, then it's bad luck, too late and then it's not taken into any account.

What I am worried about for you is that way down the track your movements will become more restricted, and I'm sorry to mention this but it should be told, as it's happening to me from my car accident (hips) and my head injury, but this isn't about me, so I am worried about the right compensation that you should be entitled to.

A lawyer will be able to help you with this, I know it will cost some money, but you have to weigh up between receiving the right care and any compensation to being dictated to by work care, and generally it's always in their favour.

So if you have to leave work because of this injury and your depression a lawyer won't let the company walk all over you, which they will try and do, but remember they have workers compensation to cater for this.

You may also need counselling for this illness and again workers com should pay for this, and a lawyer would ensure this. L Geoff. x

[blackholebegone]

Hi Geoff

So far WC have paid for everything, including 9 weeks in a private psychiatric hospital. They conrinue to pay fo psychiatrist, day group and physiotherapy. I had a pasf histoey of depdession but had never had such a severe episode. After my attempted suicide, and ongoing suicidal thoughts they have done everything they csn to assist me in my recovery. 

I feel bad that I am not better as they have put so much time and effort into gettinf me back to work and I still feel suicidsl at mes.