Just saying hello/needing support

[Karl23]

Hi I'm Karl. I'm in my late 20s and have suffered from bouts of depression since I was 13. Just in the last few days I have decided that I need to reach out and get some support because it's terrible that I have spent nearly 20 years being sad. It's been a vicious cycle. I've lost 2 friends to cancer in the last year and a family member passed away in January. I'm having a hard time coping and I'm not looking after myself properly. 

 i am so lucky to have a girlfriend that loves and cares for me so much and she is always there for me. But I need to give her some relief and need support from others. I want to own my life. 

 If anybody from Perth knows of any support groups that may be of help I would very much appreciate it. I just want to be happy. Like we all do and deserve to be!

[Fairywings]

Hi there karl im venessa and welcome. U have come to the right place for support. Im sorry to hear u r going through this hard time atm but im very happy that ur gf is supporting u as well. That's about as long it was for me i was very young myself now im 37 yrs old so yes long time to be dealing with it. I would start out at ur local gp first they will guide u and even be able to referr u onto some extra support if that's what is needed. I hope this has helped in some way please keep in touch xx 

[White_Rose]

Dear Karl

Hello and welcome to Beyond Blue. That's a lot of sadness for you to manage in one go. It's great that your GF is helping and I understand how you do not want her to carry all the burden. Hopefully we can make some suggestions to you that will be helpful.

First of all I suggest you visit your GP and have a chat about how you feel. A GP can refer you to someone who can help you through this tough time.

Beyond Blue is also a good place to talk, either on the forums or one to one on the phone 1300 22 4636 available 24/7, or online. Scroll to the bottom of the page and click on the Chat online section.

Headspace is another good place to go. www.headspace.org.au This is the National Youth Mental Health Foundation and was set up to help young people. There are centres throughout Australia , or if there is no centre near you they will help with telephone chats. Check out their web page.

Grief does come in waves, then gradually fades for while. It does come back, although with less force, and goes again. Unfortunately these waves will continue for a while but will decrease in force and frequency over time. It will be good for you to find someone who can help you talk about these things. It really does lessen the grief.

Writing in to us on the BB forum is also a good idea. This is a safe place to be and no one knows who you are. So please continue to write and tell how you feel and what is happening in your life.

I look forward to your next post.

Mary

[Karl23]

Thanks for your responses, it's very kind of you.

I do need to arrange a time to see a GP. I'm going through a daily struggle to motivate myself. I will get there. Tomorrow is another day. I just need to keep chipping away and eventually I will be where I need to be. 

[150lashes]

Hi Karl

Welcome! I'm new here myself.

It sounds like you've had a lot to deal with of late. In my situation a series events lead to my depression and anxiety.

Sometimes it's just one thing after another..and we struggle. We need help but don't know how to go about it.

For me I lived in denial for about 6 months.. 

As my son was also unwell I spent a lot of time with medical professionals. It was actually my GP who picked up on it and voiced her concerns in a round about way.

Which initially I ignored her advice, until one night I had a major panic attack and was rushed to hospital with a suspected heart Issue. As I have a heart condition also, it had to be ruled out. So there I was in the ED getting a cannula put in, blood tests, ECG, chest xray.. It wasn't fun.

I went on to have several other panic and anxiety attacks after that before I mustered the courage to actually sit down with my GP and be open and Honest.

​I am 33 - life ahead of me. Don't suffer in silence, do something today. I know it seems hard to get out of bed some days, but we have a whole lot of living to do and this will eventually pass.

​good luck 

[geoff]

dear Karl, I'm pleased that you have joined the site because suffering in silence for 7 years is far too long, which may mean that you were in denial, but because of your friends passing away as well a family member has brought light that you do need help, so good on you.
I'm sorry I live in Victoria and can't help you, so yes I would ring the BB phone number who would be able to help you, plus I would click under 'Get Support' at the top of this page and there will be information there that will help you.
It's terrific you have a g/friend you love who wants to help you, but can I suggest that you don't cut her off entirely because if you do then it could cause some problems, and that's not what you want to happen.
To be happy is what we all want to be, but sometimes we hit a snag which we are unable to face or to try and cope with, and that's when we need our support group to back us up, and this could be our friends that have stuck with us, family if they do want to help us, doctors, psychologists but also this site who has a large variety of all ages and different personalities that are keen to help anyone having problems. Geoff.

[Karl23]

I am getting worse and worse. I see the illness getting deeper and deeper everyday. It's like I am dealt a hand of cards every day and whatever I am dealt is what I have to deal with until I sleep again. But it doesn't end there. The constant self sabotage and self loathing - fueled by liquor and inner loneliness, I could be in a room full of people and feel like nobody knows who I really am.

I bring this on myself. I'm a warrior and I solider on and I try to get through it - but as each year passes by I descend into my own self darkness more and more, and it scares me.

[Kazzl]

Hey Karl - I'm glad you reached out here again mate, and sorry things are getting worse for you. Self-sabotage and self-loathing, loneliness, yes I know those particular enemies well. And, especially when they get stuck into the booze, they can turn into giants who surround the real us and stop us being who we are, and stop other people finding their way to us.

Time for some help to break through them mate. Have you talked to your GP yet? I really think you should. They can put you on a mental health care plan that will enable you to see a psychologist under Medicare and give you a chance to work out strategies.

If you're spiralling down, it's unlikely to just stop by itself eh? You are young, full of promise and a vital part of this world. Don't let this illness rob you (and everyone else) of you. And arm yourself with information mate - it's our best weapon. Read as much as you can about our condition (plenty of good info on the BB site) and maybe make some notes about what resonates with you so you can remember everything when you go to a doctor (sometimes we can get very tongue-tied trying to talk about these things).

A self-sabotaging warrior isn't going to get far without a good army to help him eh? Call in the reinforcements mate. The BB helpline 1300 22 4636 might be a good start for you too - have a chat with a professional, get some direction. And try very hard to lay off the booze, it's a depressant and a destructive influence that leaves us unable to even face the battle, let alone fight. If you want some help cutting back or giving it up, I can help you with that, as can many others here who've been through that particular war with ourselves.

Very best wishes to you Karl

Kaz

[Karl23]

Thank you. Took me a while to come back here. I am going to get this sorted next week. Thanks heaps for your help and time

[Kazzl]

My pleasure Karl, I'm really glad you're going to take some action mate. Let us know how it goes, and know we're always here to talk.

Cheers

Kaz