I've never felt so shattered

[Jen_Verona]

Hi. I've never reached out like this, but for the last while (could be weeks, could be months, I don't know anymore) I've felt just destroyed. Shattered. On the outside I look fine, but almost every time I get a moment of privacy I break down and either cry or have a panic attack. I've seen a psychologist about the panic but not about the other side of it. It's a crushing feeling in my chest and throat that never goes away. It makes me snappy and distant at my friends/family and I'm afraid of losing them if this keeps going, so I work really hard to hide this constant, soul-sapping feeling from those around me. I've never felt this low before, never been diagnosed with depression (only social anxiety and mild panic), and am looking for any advice. Thanks.

[TimOG1990]

Hi,

Whilst I don't know your entire circumstance I can somewhat relate.

For about a year I would break down and sob thinking I was a burden to those around me and I tried to hide it. Turns out, my wife and family knew I was struggling as they know me better than I know myself.

When I could finally admit it to myself and to them I felt a load lifted. I have been seeing a psychologist for a year, working on mindfulness and recently started taking an antidepressant.

You won't lose people who love you for you and therefore need not worry, as best you can. It is an illness, better to own it and not let it define you so you can get the help you deserve.

You're never alone!

All the best 🙂

[Skary Bill]

Hi Jen,

I just wanted to add my voice to Tim's awesome reply and echo the sentiment that you're definitely not alone. I'm no stranger to that weight on the chest feeling myself. You've found a great place here to reach out for some support. Everyone is friendly and helpful. So much value in just speaking amongst others who understand.

Bill.

[walpurti]

Tim mentioned mindfulness which I have been learning more about recently ... not exactly sure how it is different to what we used to call meditation. But exercises that help you relax your body, also relax your mind. When I was experiencing acute anxiety I combined physical exercise with relaxation techniques ... I'd like to say that cured me, but no, it helps you to manage the condition ... which is what most of us are doing most of the time.