I'm not sure?

[Andy82]

Hi all,

Just did the typical 'Dr Google' and typed into the text box, "I don't have anything that interests me" - top hit - this website.

I'm not entirely sure if I have depression, however here is my story.

A few years ago I suffered a shoulder injury which required surgery and a lot of rehabilitation and has not returned to normal function. A year or two later my wife and I welcomed our beautiful daughter, and I subsequently took a new job elevating to Management in a large company and we purchased our first home. Sounds like a good progression right?

Now two years later, I don't have anything that interests me, or motivates me. My job is very demanding and I feel a void moving away from the engineering role I was previously in. I work long hours, and look after my daughter on the weekends (which I love, however can be exhausting after a long week). My wife and I also have another girl on the way which is exciting, however I don't feel the same excitement I did with my first daughter, I'm not sure whether this is because I'm so busy or not!

Prior to all of this I was happy, motivated and generally enjoyed things. I feel it's the job I'm in which is possibly bringing me down, however it's making me feel terrible at times. I find myself lazy, taking shortcuts not doing day to day things like organising a car service - it just seems too hard.

Sorry for the long post. Not sure who to chat to before I see someone.

Thanks.

[blondguy]

Hello Andy A Warm Welcome to the BB Forums

I am sorry that you have lost your 'zest' or passion in your life right now. I have had depression for many years and it is a very common but dreadful illness to have. I see that you have a senior role that are demanding in nature, you have also mention you are working long hours.

Not organizing the car service due to being overwhelmed/exhausted is interesting too. I am not a doc but I do remember the feelings you have when I was in a senior role last year. You definitely have some indicators of being mentally exhausted. You have a great deal on your plate and your system may be letting you know to slow down. There is a depression check list if you scroll down its under facts. Maybe even a GP visit to start with could also be a bonus for you.

I do hope you feel better soon Andy

Kind Thoughts

Paul

[Andy82]

Thanks for the reply.

I do feel mentally exhausted, and have done for about 2 years, however it sticks around even when I've had time away.

The car service is just an example. It's been almost 6 months and I still can't get to it. Sad I know 😞

Thanks for the advice.

[pipsy]

Hi Andy. It sounds as though you are exhausted. You work long hours, plus taking care of an energetic two year old would certainly be taxing. It's sounds like you've just worn yourself out. I would also suggest a visit to your Dr. Do you have other family members you could visit at the weekend, where your daughter could perhaps play with other children her age.

Lynda.

[Andy82]

Thanks for the reply.

Unfortunately we don't have family close. They're 3 or more hours away.

I do have friends with kids to play, however they're a little older. It's also difficult to find the right time.

I'll visit the doc this week I think.

[blondguy]

Hi Andy....If I may ask you....how is your sleep going?

Paul

[Andy82]

Hi Paul,

I find that I'm often tired and sometimes after dinner and putting my daughter to bed that I'd prefer to go straight to bed. Once I'm asleep I'm fine, no insomnia:)

[blondguy]

Thanks for posting back Andy.....

That is good news with your sleep. Many people with depression have difficulty sleeping. It sounds like you are suffering from exhaustion. (just humble opinion of course)

No Insomnia...:-)

Good to talk to you Andy

Paul

[pipsy]

Hi Andy. Reading your posts, it seems you feel you're on an emotional roller coaster. You go to work through the week, weekends you take care of your daughter, go to bed, sleep, arise and start the whole treadmill again on Monday. Is there a way you could somehow change your pattern of life. Perhaps a trip to the park with your daughter, a picnic with your wife and daughter. If you could somehow get out of your routine, perhaps this would help. You mentioned that when you do have 'time out' it doesn't alter your feelings of exhaustion. This could be because even though you're away from your normal routine, you're still mentally listing everything that needs doing. In that frame, you're not able to relax, possibly because you feel a bit guilty when you try to distance yourself from home, because you feel you have to get back because of the things at home that you need to do. As I said earlier, it's an emotional roller coaster/merry-go-round. Perhaps when you take your daughter out next time, instead of worrying about what's not getting done, think about the time with your daughter. She won't be a toddler forever, so concentrate on enjoying this time with her. I realise that's easy to say, but, guilt over worrying about what you haven't done, is counter-productive when you're depressed. Perhaps when you see your Dr, you could have a talk about your worries re: the job, looking after home and daughter. We all have to have 'time out' to recharge, use the time with your daughter as well. The sky won't fall in if dishes aren't done or the vacuuming is left. Your health is what you need to concentrate on.

Lynda.

[Andy82]

I know this thread is a couple of years old now, but I just wanted to provide an update.

These feelings didn't move away in three years; I finally went to the doctor a fews months ago. After some therapy, many conversations and still nothing, I've been diagnosed with depression. I'm now on medication and after 1 week, I feel better than I have in a LONG time. Hopefully the trend continues in an upward fashion and I can get my life back on track!