Hi Artfuldodger
When I think about your younger self, I wish I was there to make a difference to you as your dad treated you so heartlessly. Whether it's the feeler in me or the mum in me, either way I wish I was there for you during those times.
It's definitely challenging when you're a feeler with a number of raw nerves. We'll feel when every single one of them is touched by someone. Whether those raw nerves trigger rage, depression, anxiety, heartache or something else, you can definitely feel it.
To become the pure observer of a raw nerve being touched is definitely a hard thing to do. The practice of emotionally detaching from what you feel in order to analyse it (who's touched that nerve, exactly what kind of feel it has to it, where it stems from, what it tells you about your nature and the nature of the person who touched it, what's needed to heal it etc) can be so deeply challenging.
Being one of those mind/body/spirit kind of gals, what I love about the spirit based definition of 'feeling/s' comes down to it pointing to ability. So, 'I have the ability to feel'. Perhaps it could be said that you have an ability your father didn't have, one he was lacking for one reason or another. Maybe he was 'toughened up' and lost it in the process.
I know a number of men who are what you'd call super sensitive. Such heightened sensitivity serves them well. They rely on it. One is a business man. He can sense a closed mind in a person, based on how they lead him to feel (he can feel a shutdown). He can sense/feel an enraging personality, a degrading depressing arrogant one, an inspiring one, an open minded wonder filled (wonderful) one and so on. His sensitivity gives him advantages in his line of work. He can sense intention and attitude, through words/language, tone, physical mannerisms and more. He can also sense the need to emotionally detach in order to analyse where a person may be coming from. Some of the most sensitive and successful men have developed incredible intuition in business largely based on their ability to get a really good feel for people and situations.
I'm a big believer in the importance of not losing our ability to feel (shutting it down) but mastering it instead. Feelings are very telling. Gaslighters definitely have a feel to them.
