Exhaustion

[Quilter57]

I have had major depression and anxiety for years. Currently I am dealing with several major stressors. Also I am obese and drink too much. I am unbelievably exhausted all the time. I have no energy and want to sleep all day. Any ideas of what might give me a kick up the bum and get me going again?

[therising]

Hi Quilter57

I think we can experience a basic level of exhaustion, a serious level of exhaustion and even a depressing level of exhaustion. When it comes to depressing levels, there's absolutely nothing like it. Not only does it feel impossible to get off the couch much of the time, you can be stuck on the couch with some seriously dark inner dialogue going on. My heart goes out to you as you struggle so intensely.

Being a largish 52yo gal, my sleep apnea is impacted somewhat by my weight and age. There are a number of factors that can produce a depressing and exhausting level of sleep apnea, such as weight, aging muscles (including throat muscles and the tongue), alcohol consumption etc. Wondering if you've ever been led to consider a sleep test, to see if everything's okay in the area of sleep. Waking up every morning and spending most of the day wishing we could find the time to sleep is definitely tormenting.

Being a body/mind/soul kinda person, I tend to examine what's going on in all 3 areas when I become depressed and/or anxious...

• Physical aspects: Do I need blood tests to pinpoint depressing deficiencies? What energy sources are powering my physical self? Plenty of hydro power (water), solar power/Vitamin D, nuclear power (fruit and veg from the earth), kinetic energy or energy creating energy (exercise) etc. I'm a shocker in all these areas at the moment, btw. Gotta get my act together. Good quality sleep helps generate energy. Lately I've been falling asleep on the couch at night before putting in my SA oral appliance. When the experts state that we're a chemical powerhouse, helps if we've got all the right chemistry and chemical reactions going so as to feel the power
• Mental aspects: Mental stress torments and exhausts our physical self. It's a serious sleep disruptor too. Dark inner dialogue doesn't help matters when it comes to creating new and healthier habits. It's really hard trying to manage the hellish dialogue that can pop in which may sound like 'What's the point in even trying? You're hopeless. You're never going to get any better. You're just lazy and dysfunctional. Accept it'. Strategies/skills to 'shut the hell up' (that's going on in our mind) can be sorely needed at times
• Soulful aspects: Getting a feel for whether we're around inspiring people or unhelpful depressing people or stress inducing people is a natural ability. When I say inspiring, the inspiration has to match the circumstances we face. While someone could easily inspire 99 people in a room, they're not necessarily going to inspire the 1 person who has a depressing level of sleep apnea. If our energy levels are so low to the point where we can't even feel inspiration, sometimes it pays to see a good GP (energy detective). Personally, I can't feel energy in motion (e-motion) if I have next to no energy to start with. All I can feel is no energy or 'flat battery' mode. We're designed to be 'in charge', in more ways than one 🙂

[geoff]

Hello Quilter, thanks for posting your comment.

Firstly you have recognised the fact that you are obese and drink too much, alcohol is not going to solve anything, except get you intoxicated, that may or may not be fine until when the next day comes along, so you're back to square one and the alcohol will make you feel exhausted, so it's all a merry go round.

In your mind you have to decide that something has to change, counsellors can help, but the final decision is yours, do I want to change your appearance and what you drink and if you have one drink, then need another and then another the only option is to stop, and if you need assistance with this, then please get back to me.

With being obese, stop the junk food as well as the take away food and limit yourself to have a treaty just once a day.

Go for a walk down to end of the street a couple of times a day, but take a bottle of water with you, nothing else and eventually increase your walking, once you have a positive intention in your mind then do it.

You can do this and please get back to us.

Geoff.

Life Member.

[Bob_22]

Hi Quilter57,

This is a great question and something a lot of people with major depressive disorder and anxiety (no matter how mild or severe) ask themselves. 

Outside of professional help there is a range of strategies we can employ to assist with motivation. For me personally I found keeping a routine to be the best way to combat being anergic. This would also incorporate exercise as recommended by my psychiatrist. He told me that aerobic exercise for 30 min, 2 -3x week has a huge impact of major depressive disorder (MDD). I would also recommending avoiding naps and having a strict sleeping routine. Here is some good information on sleep and mental health: https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/staying-well/sleeping-well 

Another invaluable tool is social connection. Catching up with a friend or family member at least once a week has become a staple in my recovery plan. Even if it is only for 15 minutes or so it does a lot of good. Isolation is a huge risk factor for MDD.

I hope some of this helps and please keep us updated.

Bob

[Quilter57]

My cardiologist wants me to have a sleep study which I have been putting off. I shall do that. Also blood tests. I have done meditation for the dark inner dialogue so shall do that too. And I have a relative I love very much going through a difficult time. I am supporting as much as I can but it is draining. Think I need to set some.boundaries.

[Quilter57]

Kick up the bum I needed! I know the alcohol has to go. I've done it before so can do it again. I upped my exercise by increasing my steps every week. Do that again too. And sort diet out. Probably Weight Watchers.

[Quilter57]

I will try the routine suggestion and work up to 30 min exercise. And reconnect with my craft groups

[yours_truly]

Hi Quilter57,

Congratulations on having the courage to recognise that what’s going on isn’t healthy and congratulations on having the courage to reach out!! 

I understand that reality is harsh and that even the basic things like standing in the shower for 30 seconds is exhausting. Maybe even just the thought can be exhausting. It’s okay to feel exhausted all the time because you are fighting battles undoubtedly brutal and painful. Rest is necessary. I’m saying that, do not push yourself to extents unreasonable. Start with small goals everyday. 

Examples could be:

1. Wash a single dish everyday for 3 days

2. Walk across the house just the one time, once a week

3. begin with exercising your fingers. There are short videos on youtube for finger exercises that are a great way to start feeling motivated

I hope this helps, all of these example are things i’ve used!! I’ve moved up as those kick starters have worked. 

I wish you all the best,

yours_truly

[Bob_22]

Hi Quilter57,

Thanks for the update. It's great to hear you're putting some strategies in place. Connecting with your craft group is a great idea! Let us know how you go please. Also be kind/gentle with yourself, you're making some big changes.

Bob

[Candice5]

Hi Quilter57,

I am very overweight and struggle with alcohol abuse as well. I'm going to my second AA meeting tomorrow night so wish me luck.