Depression or bipolar?

[PrincessPoot]

I have been suffering from depression on and off for probably more than 30 years. I am 47 now. Last December I was at my worst in a long time and sought a medication review. I am now being monitored for Bipolar II or the second time in my life. Does anyone have any advice on what behaviours I should be monitoring or what I should look back on that I may have missed?

[JessF]

Hello Princess Poot, when you say you are being monitored, are you seeing a psychiatrist? The tests for different kinds of mental illnesses all involve checklists of symptoms that your psychiatrist will ask you about. I don't think it's a good idea to start looking for symptoms yourself, otherwise you'll start jumping at shadows and start seeing illness everywhere.

When you say you've been at your worst, could you elaborate further? What has been going on for you?

[PrincessPoot]

Hi JessF, thanks for your reply. I am seeing a psychologist and a psychiatrist - counselling with one and medication review with the other. My psychiatrist has asked me to fill out a daily mood chart and my partner will attend my next appointment to describe my behaviour over the years. I have had one psychiatrist say I am bipolar and other medical professionals disagreeing. It's all very confusing. When I said I was at my worst, I didn't want to go to work, slept a lot, felt anxious, cried, didn't see people etc. I have had episodes of going, going, going until I crash, shopping a lot and talking fast and a lot. Regardless, But I continue I tough it out every day at work and keep up a happy persona even when I don't feel it.

[pipsy]

Dear PrincessPoot. My name is Lynda. You sound as thought you're in an emotional whirlpool. Also with psychiatrist saying one thing and other professionals disagreeing, you must feel a bit like 'pig in the middle'. Have you been checked for thyroid problems? From what you're describing you could have thyroid problems. It sounds as though no-one wants to give you a definite diagnosis, so you're the proverbial guinea pig. It's a good idea to check the mood swings, that does give the Dr's a guide as to where you are emotionally. You could be just plain worn out physically, that would also explain the determination to 'soldier on' as the saying goes.

Here's hoping you get some help. Lynda.

[romantic_thi3f]

Hi PrincessPoot,

Thanks for reaching out. It's great that you're trying to recognise your symptoms and get a diagnosis. I understand that it can be frustrating not knowing, but often Bipolar and certain types of Depression can overlap a lot.

Episodes of Bipolar II vary from person to person, so if you did have Bipolar II and a friend had Bipolar II it may look and appear quite differently. One of the biggest things that people notice first is changes in their routine; such as forgetting to eat because you've been so busy, or sleeping more/less than usual, or eating more/less than usual.

If there's certain things that you remember from last time this can help too - such as keeping track of your budget so that if you shop more that can help you pick up that something might not be right. If you practice mindfulness or CBT (therapy), this can also be a great way to pick up on things that you might not usually.

Another thing that can help is having people let you know. I have a close friend with Bipolar and she's asked me to let her know when she's entering an episode and talking more or not sounding like herself. This might be helpful for you as well, to have someone you trust let you know when you don't seem like yourself.

Hope this helps and you can get some answers soon -

[PrincessPoot]

Hi Lynda, thanks so much for your comments. I think emotional whirlpool is quite appropriate. It is draining, especially as I'm always analysing my moods and behaviour and worrying I'm about to go through another low. My thyroid is all good and I am getting help. Hopefully I'll know soon. Best wishes