Comfort foods killing me... ( depression)

[Out_the_window]

Lately ive noticed that my depression could be killing me.. With yummy foods.. And that is no joke. Ive stacked on the weight since my family passed away. And i dont seem to care. Reaching for a packet of C'Cs or nervously pigging on a packet of bickies during a footy game is inevitable. I seem to treat it as normal. Am in the mid to high 90 kgs. And dont fit into my favourite clothes. I have a huge double chin. And i constantly laugh at it. A doctor said... IT WILL KILL YOU... i said YEP. And didnt stop my ways. What can i do???? Its linked to my depression. Since my families death. . Cheers.. Wayno.

[Neil_1]

Hi there O.T.W. (Wayno)

Thank you for posting and welcome to Beyond Blue.

Having escapisms or addictions in regard to any kind of mental health issue are so very common. And they range from a whole array of options, drinking, gambling are probably two of the very big ones, but comfort eating, I’ve heard about also. Unfortunately with a lot of these addictions, they are not generally very good for us. Though it was a very interesting and unusual comment that your doctor made to you.

I am assuming that by you coming here, you are wishing to seek ways to get back on track? To try and change things around a bit?

The starting process would be to set yourself small goals. I always think of trying to complete a process in stages, instead of jumping in with both feet and trying to do it all in one go. Now am not sure of your home environment, whether you have family of your own, etc or whether it’s just you.

But if you have a range of different ‘yummy foods’ in your home, pantry, fridge, etc, it might be a start to try eliminating one of them in a weekly shop, if that’s how you set yourself up? So instead of buying those packets of tim tams, or whatever, “leave” them on the shelf, maybe replace them with bananas or apples or your favourite fruit?

Again, also not sure of your background, but whether you enjoy fitness, exercise, sports, etc … whether you’ve ever belonged to any clubs at all, but this can also be an amazing source of relief from our mental stresses. I guess this is something that really occupies me; with all that I’m coping with, I find smashing myself in the gym, or doing some kind of cardio, is a brilliant way to help myself mentally … and the beauty about this, is that it helps the body become fitter as well. A super session completed with endorphins running through the body afterwards is quite an awesome feeling.

But in closing, the commencement of this has to come from you and you have to be ready to want to do this.

I hope I’ve said something that has been helpful and I hope others will come along with suggestions and advice of their own.

Would love to hear back from you.

Neil

[romantic_thi3f]

Hey Out the window/Wayno

Thanks for your post.

Ah comfort food - I think we all can be guilty of it sometimes (and lately it's been me too). I'm glad that you're reaching out about this and sounds like you're trying to make your health a bit of a priority.

I think Neil was right on the mark there when he talked about escapisms; food is rarely about hunger but instead it serves a purpose;- for some people they eat when they're bored, stressed, angry, sad, lonely.. I think the key is finding out what that might be and then trying to replace it with something else. Maybe if it's feeling lonely you might want to consider catching up with friends or meeting some new people, or giving somebody a call. If it's anger, it could be doing some exercise. I think the trick is to try and find something you'd genuinely enjoy doing. There's no point in telling yourself you'll go to the gym if you hate the gym.

I think the other important thing to mention here is self-compassion. Sometimes (but not always) comfort eating can be a bit of a cycle. We feel lonely/sad/bored and so we eat and then maybe there's a bit of shame or disappointment there (like I shouldn't have done that) so the cycle keeps going. We've got to learn to halt it. For me that looks like saying "ah, I screwed up again - I'm going to go and do (something better)" instead of "ah damn I keep doing this, oh well". Even though it doesn't sound like much it plays a big part in how you're feeling.

I'm also wondering too if it might help to see a counsellor; only because struggling with grief can be tough to handle on your own.

Hope this helps,

[monkey_magic]

Hi there,

Comfort food, yum. These days I'll fry a salmon or do a pasta. Yep, still eat chocolate and love those C'C's. Im going to be typical & say its all about moderation or swapping half the packet of biscuits for a lean steak with onions for example.

Im like you, an emotional eater. I used to feel shame and guilt afterwards.

I believe u can swap some junk for some real food,

What u think?

Sorry bout your family passing away. I hope you can find other comforting things, reading a book? Video games? Anything you into?

Be good to have support around you at this time xox I'm sending mine x

[suba]

Hi there,

Yes the comfort eating can be a real problem, different people do it for a whole lot of different reasons. I went through it some years ago and my weight blew out 86kg to 100kg I was under quite a lot of stress at home and work and it wasn't until one of my Mates said you need to stop eating you look shocking, it got me thinking so I found things to do when I felt like eating, go for a walk, jump online, just something to take my mind off it. This worked to a certain degree but the real positive was when I decided to down load an APP called Map My Walk, this will not only show you how far you have walked but also how long it took and the good thing is it will talk to you along the way on how your progress is and it was not long before I was competing against my previous times and the weight started to fall 3kgs in the first month 5kgs in the next month, I found that not only was I losing weight but my fitness had improved greatly and it was not long before I down loaded May My Run, I don't run fast but my weight is now back to 85kgs and I can run 5km in under 28mins. This might not be for you but there would be something you like doing find what it is and do it, but always get some exercise it works wonders for stress.

Good Luck I am right behind you.

GREG

[Aoifa]

Oh sweetheart that is so sad to hear of your familys'death. The death of a loved one can be traumatic as well as tragic. We deal with the pain of grief in different ways. For me it was chocolate and lots of it!

Yes over eating is a cause for concern. But it is hard to do anything about it because - to put it simply - you are grieving.

Grief takes a number of forms and yours is over eating.

Would it help if you got some grief councelling? I found it to be very helpful in trying to understand this very real pain. There are a number of places that offer this service. Perhaps ask your doctor what they think about you accessing councelling?

My heart goes out to you at this time,

Aeiofa

[Sunnydays8]

Hi Wayno/out the window,

I have a similar issue in that I have depression and I love food and because I feel depressed I don't seem to care what it's doing to me. I'm severely overweight and my health is appalling.

I know my mindset can change though. Earlier in the year I had lost 12 kilos because I decided I didn't want to feel so unhealthy,fatigued and lethargic. For me, the hardest part is the first step. Stopping the unhealthy choices and choosing healthy options. I've found once I've gotten into a routine and developed habits it's been a lot easier than I thought. I remember looking back and being shocked at how much junk I could eat at once because my mindset had completely changed.

I think if my mindset changed once then it can again. So I think it could for you too. Like I said the first step for me is the hardest, maybe you'll find for you once you start healthy eating it won't be as hard as you think? It's hard being depressed and finding the effort to care but I found once I started getting into it I did actually start to care about how I felt and how I looked.

I found that what worked for me was being accountable. I told people I was changing to a healthy lifestyle and I saw a dietitian. I ordered my groceries online because I knew I'd be too tempted to buy junk in the supermarket. If I did have to go to a supermarket there were certain aisles I wouldn't walk down because it wasn't worth the temptation. At the same time I allowed myself a treat once a week so I didn't "go off the wagon".

I also found it helped (with depression and motivation) having a more active lifestyle which for me just meant getting out of the house! Going for walks and being in the sunshine.

I recommend seeing a psychologist. Therapy has helped me with grief as well as my depression and anxiety disorder. I'm not "cured" by any means but it has helped me to learn ways to better cope.

Thanks for your post. You've helped me. I've been so depressed that I haven't cared about myself at all. You have made me remember that it is possible for me to change my ways and that I'll start caring more once I actually get into it .

I hope something someone has said on here helps you. You're not alone.

[anna1616]

Hi Wayno,

I've had MDD my whole life and for me - when fatigue strikes hard I reach for SUGAR!

Tips that helped me: learning more about nutrition and treating it as fuel - a health focus instead of a weight focus is a positive frame of mind. I read books and doccos about all kinds of diets and the impact of negative diets and that fuelled me to take better care of my health.

Secondy - is a personal trainer or group classess for exercise an option? Or just a fitbit? Maybe aim to get your 10,000 steps per day in as a starting point. I find my simple Fitbit alta super motivating!

Thirdly - treating the cause of the depression - get yourself into treatment - whatever form it may be. I take medes and had a psych for about a year and now I'm doing really well - if you're emotionally eating you have to treat the root of the problem.

Finally - be kind to yourself, but also push yourself. You deserve to feel well both physically and emotionally, and eating and training is a big part of that 🙂 Start with small managable goals - like to move every day. Consistency is key (i've just realised I sound like those really annoying bodybuilders at the gym - ew!) But I went from sedentary (being treated for MDD) to working out 6 times a week because of group classes and the committment I made to train at least four times a week. And I kept it up for four months 🙂 So it's possible to go from an awful place to a positive one - baby steps!

GOOD LUCK

[Out_the_window]

Thanks Niel. And thanks for your advice.. Ive tried going to gym. I used to compete in running and surfing. But im way out of condition now. I wont give up. I will try surfing again soon. Cheers.. Wayno.

[Out_the_window]

Thanks Anna. I will try to get me 10,000 steps in after i get my fitbit.. Sounds a good idea. Cheers. Wayno.