The BB cafe

[Kazzl]

The BB cafe is open for business!
Welcome all to a new chill and chat place for everyone on the forum.

The BB cafe is whatever you want it to be. There are comfy sofas, tables and chairs, coffee machines, a kitchen stocked with everything. There's a pool outside, a bbq area, an annexe with comfy beds for a quiet sleep, tv, dvd, books and whatever else you would like to have here.

Most of all, it's a place to meet friends and fellow travellers for a bit of company. Talk over problems, tell jokes, share your day, escape into a world of your making. Grab a coffee and pull up a chair ... 

So, with a nod to the wonderful Carole King (Hard Rock Cafe) ...

Now if you're feeling just a little bit lonely
Don't sit at home just mopin'
Come on down to where the friendship flows freely
You know the door is always open

At the BB cafe
Come to the BB cafe
They will help keep your blues at bay
At the BB cafe

Important Message from ModSupport: 
The main intention of the BB Cafe is to encourage light conversation. Please look after your fellow community members by nuturing the BB Cafe as a place to escape some of the more pressing issues in life and save those conversations for personal threads. 

[Leisa68]

School meals for me from the tuckshop were Jaffa's partly burnt, with baked beans or spaghetti or mince for lunch. 50 cents each. Oh, the days!!!

[On The Road]

Good morning! 🙂

Hi Mekitty, I think some helpers are professionally trained in communication skills, while some others aren't but they have hearts of being caring and helping 😸 as someone who's not good at socialising, I'm quite anxious over silent intervals within conversations and try to find something to talk about to fill them.

[mmMekitty]

Hi On the Road,

It is very common for people to feel uncomfortable in silence. Most people feel there is a need to fill silences, or not to have conversation rise & fall, as if when it falls, it means something is wrong, but what is the problem with allowing for a silence? Why is is it so uncomfortable?

I think it could be a very good exercise, you know, something to practice, to allow a moment of silence before rushing straight in with your next sentence or question or answer to their question. Give you & anyone you are talking with, time to think & consider what has been said, & how you want to respond, rather than jumping in with whatever comes to mind.

I used to struggle with thinking of something to say to my Psychiatrist, & it felt so frustrating, while my mind seemed to have gone blank.

Now, I struggle to stop myself rushing on & not giving his words a chance to register in my mind, let alone time to think about what he has said.. so, it would be a good idea to stop, take in what he said, & maybe even not go on with what was already half out of my mouth, but to, instead, consider his response/question... wouldn't that be a better conversation, where we are hearing & listening & thinking about what is said, even if it means minutes of silence?

So what does it feel to you, if there is a silence during a conversation?

Anyone? Please, if anyone else has a few thoughts, please, feel free to jump in.

[GTL]

Having nothing to say can be very nice indeed if you are in an equal conversation. When there is no awkwardness and you are sharing stillness of thought it is something that is more profound than any words could ever be.

[GTL]

Hello all,

Glad to in a friendly space here. No real idea on how to make discussions here, but I do like to talk. Forgive me, I'm very new.

I'm a writer, teacher, photographer and cyclist. I do this to be happy - it's very simple.

Here's to keeping on top of things in the funnest way possible, and to talk to those who want to share the sad times to they can fade away.

🙂 Take care all!

[mmMekitty]

Hi GTL,

It's good to meet you. It sounds like you have some satisfying & enjoyable occupations in your life. What is it you teach?

When you find things which fill you (your soul, if you like), & give you a sense of achievement & are doing because you love the doing, then life has more meaning, more substance, & these things can carry you through the tough times. 😺

Have you been reading much of other threads? (I notice you've posted a few times). Have you learned how to make a thread of your own, so you can open a discussion about any particular topic you want/need to talk about?

I hope we talk more, but right now, I'm 🙀tired, & need💤.

mmMekitty

[Leisa68]

Hello all

I get a bit stressed when there are silences in conversations. I feel like I have to cover things and talk about something that is not related to what we were talking about. My mother-in-law often lapses into silence during conversations. I asked my partner what I should do during these silences and he just said let it go, she has always lapsed into silence during conversations. And so I am, I find it hard, but I guess she is processing what is being said. We are all different I guess. I just prattle on non-stop, with my mind spinning on what I should say next.

[On The Road]

Good evening everyone🌝

Hi Mekitty, thank you for sharing.😺 I understand it could actually be an opportunity for me to organise what's the best way to say in communications as English is not my first language (I stutter in my first language sometimes) for now, I'm still a bit awkward during these silences, but I feel more comfortable than before.

Hi GTL, nice to have you here, 🙂I would be lucky if I could have moments of the silence of thought that is more profound than words, hope I can have these kinds of conversations in real life.

Hi Leisa,🙂 I think I can understand how hard it is. and I feel not comfortable within these silences I feel like they were sort of judging me and I have to reply really appropriately to meet their expectations.

[mmMekitty]

It hasn't happened often for me, but I think it is a wonderful feeling to be able to sit with someone, & not feel any need to keep talking. Just to be with someone, & there is a connection that does 't need words to confirm.

Losing my sight, & it seems very difficult to feel whether someone is still in the room with me or if they have wandered off, even while I was speaking, is very disconcerting. *Please take note, & let blind people know when you are leaving the room. 😸

But, when I was little, I swear I could sense my sis in the room, when we had seperate beds, & in the dark, I felt her over there on the other side of the room.

Or, some years later, when the family dog would have come & gone to sleep under my bed, & I knew she was there. I didn't hear her. Maybe I was unconsciously smelling her summer-warm scent? I don't know, except it felt so wonderful thinking I could sense her without knowing how.

☕&🥞? Yes, please, with🍯!

mmMekitty

[quirkywords]

mmMekitty

Silences have their place .
sitting with someone who cares in mutual silence and just being there can be quite special.
How is everyone today.?