Coping during the Coronavirus outbreak

[Sophie_M]

We recognise that many of us here in the community are feeling scared, worried and overwhelmed about Coronavirus (COVID19). 

As a result, we created this thread to allow people to come together here during those difficult times and encouraged those wanting to share or seek support to do so here in this space. 
 
It was important with this thread that we maintained perspective and supported each other as best as we could, medical, scientific and public health experts around the world have and still are working hard to contain the virus and treat those affected. 
 
The Beyond Blue Support Service is available via phone 24/7 on 1300 22 4636 or via beyondblue.org.au/get-support for online chat. 
 
There are some other helpful discussions taking place here within our forum community that you may find helpful to read or participate in: https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/online-forums/staying-well/hi-there-i-only-just-joined-and... 

This thread is now closed for further posting. Users are still able to read through and find support through already existing posts.  

[mmMekitty]

Hello all,

Telehealth sure is difficult. I managed to get Face Time working last Wednesday, 2nd time I've done that with my PDr, while all other telehealth has been as a usual phone call, while he has not seen patients face to face.

I know he is not asking for me to make face time calls work to spite me. He & his colleague - it's a small practice, have many patients & are doing their utmost to keep us all COVID free. It's not just his practice, either.If I was visiting him, I need trasnport, a driver, (whether taxi, bus, or with my helper). & therefore putting them at risk.

& that's even if I could wear a mask.

It's not easy; I find I do feel I am more closely observed, than I did when I first met him in his room. Gradually I felt more comfortable. Trust is also a big issue for me. I have to trust that he isn't scrutinising me, as if looking to see all my faults, or to identify my vulnerabilities to exploit them - indeed, I am physically safer using telehealth.

& he said he could only (most of the time) see my right ear - because, with my poor vision, I can't tell what he's seeing. I had to ask! & I can't see him anyway.

We will work through it. 😸We uncovered something I haven't directly addressed much over the years: my discomfort with people looking at me, thinking they may be assessing & negatively judging me, looking for faults & weakness, stuff like that.

There's pros & cons to using telehealth. & I can't imagine it is a picnic for any health workers.

I am very much in favour of trying to make this work, before even thinking of trying to find someone else, someone who would see people face to face. That is a most uncomfortable idea for me!

I wonder, how far away from my phone can I sit & still be clearly heard while using Face Time? If it was further away, he'd be seeing more & I'd have less screen brightness in my view. (But he may also see more of my room, things, in the background...ooo I dunno!)

mmMekitty

[Guest_1643]

Hi mm mekitty, whatever works for u. It's ok for ppl to vent about telehealth, if u like it that's fine but people's feelings are valid.

It is hard to find f2f people but for me it's worth it.

How odd I had a specialist appointment 2 weeks ago on telehealth, f2f not offered

2 weeks later for follow up, f2f encouraged.

It's sad that I don't much grt a say , and just do what they do.

I encourage ppl to speak up and ask for their needs, maybe f2f could be offered if we state our needs, some definitely do it

I've seen gp, psychiatrists, and psychologists f2f over 2 years and avoided zooms...it is my mh and I need it so much,

[Guest_1643]

Hello I note that when ever ppl vent someone will come and defend healthcare workers

This is a safe space for ppl who are mad, vulnerable, struggling, alone

I hate telehealth

It's more the timing that ppl feel the need to defend the healthcare system

How it impacts rhe most vulnerable, is always my concern

I don't feel Safe on these forums.

[Guest_1643]

Starting over is so hard, after u found someone, I'm so sorry for the loss of that safety and trust, something we all deserve

I happened to start seeing a psychiatrist who is very much for f2f.

I think we may need it, even just on occasion...I am so sorry the person u saw didn't care.

Sometimes it feels they do what suits them, and male excuses.

In this case, for me, it is a signal to run.

I like going and seeing my psych an look forward

It's his outfits, his mannerisms

His vibe, my vibe, the office, the air-conditioning, the comments about the weather, human NESS.

I know it's hard to start over and an awful distressing point to face, and I'm so sorry x

[BunnyRabbit]

Hi mmMeKitty

Don't go quiet, this forum is a safe space to talk about how you're feeling. There hasn't been as much conversation as I hoped since I recently joined but for the number of comments I have read, I feel everyone has their valid points and all contributions are valued.

It's been a very tough couple of years. I've pretty much been under voluntary house arrest since COVID. I personally prefer f2f consultations myself but in light of me having several co-morbidies I've had to settle with telehealth to limit the risks of getting COVID. And I have to say, telehealth is very difficult when trying to describe what is wrong to your medical practitioner. My GP likened it to trying to guess what underwear you are wearing by description, when I was trying to describe my pain in my abdomen when I had a stomach virus, btw I have no anatomy concept. Our first video consult, we spent 40 mins trying to get the dang thing working. Either I couldn't hear her or she couldn't hear me. We finally got it working but not gonna lie, it was a pain. The flip side is if they get sick, we wouldn't even be able to speak to them at all, so we try our best and that's all we can do.

As you mentioned, it's not just the f2f contact with the doctor/psychologist but also the contact with other patients waiting in the medical practice, the bus or Uber ride.

I can see you were trying to comfort, Golden in your own way but I think, and this is my personal thoughts only, there may be other issues for Golden, such as the lost trust and rapport Golden may be feeling. I think if I was Golden, I'd be feeling pretty hurt and helpless bc over the years, your psychologist is supposed to help you, and when you're reaching out for help and they don't seem to care, that would certainly make me feel hurt and helpless.

I'm not sure what Golden will do because it's a really tough decision, either stick it out and not be able to completely get the help you need, or bite the bullet and start again.

I can only hope whatever Golden decides will be something that can have a positive outcome despite the tough decision Golden needs to make.

Please don't go quiet, forums are no different to telehealth in that sometimes what you say, isn't received in the way you intended because the audience cannot see your expression or you cannot elaborate if there is a misunderstanding.

Stay well and safe!

[golden82]

Hi bunny rabbit,

Sorry to hear you have been house bound too and would also prefer f2f. It is really hard.. i am sorry. Thank you for your empathy - u pretty much summed up how it is for me. The broken trust; the risk of starting again with a stranger. The energy this takes. It is very tough. I know though for my mh i cannot endlessly do telehealth. Seriously considering quitting altogether and just try do healing myself.. maybe just with gp and self help and helplines. I have had no real help with psychs over the years. This latest situation may be the final straw. I don't know. I hope things improve where you are so that u can resume f2f. Kind wishes to you and everyone.

[Fiatlux]

It’s been almost 2 years of living with this,

I find that I can’t remember how to drive any more.

I am still scared to go out. Even shopping for groceries is hard. I still wear a mask. That helps with my an anxiety.

I likened it to being released from detention, except that I don’t feel free.

[BunnyRabbit]

Hi Golden

Thank you for not going quiet ☺️ it's good to hear from you. I truely hope we can find a way out of 'COVID Safe' measures.

I'm really sick of telehealth (unless all I need is a script refill).

I'm not sure if I can do without my Psychologist. I've got so many things I need to work through. Mainly pandemic fatigue...

I'm sick of being held to ransome in the confines of my own home. I'm sick of being overlooked for any career advancements because I need to work from home. Just because I'm vulnerable to COVID doesn't mean I am less capable to do my job. (I have a desk job that can be fully performed remotely), but managers seem to have it in their heads that if you're not in the office, you're not working.

I miss seeing my family, especially my elderly mother, cooking together, watching movie together, going shopping together (I know she is very lonely and isolated too because all the children and grandchildren and friends stay away in case we pass on COVID to her).

I miss going for walks and returning a smile at people when I see them smile at me as they walk past. I miss spending the whole day browsing through my favourite shops instead of only leaving the house to do a mad dash for essential items.

I miss going to the gym with my niece every night thinking the lousy workout warrants a megasized Slurpee as a reward afterwards. I miss calling up friends to catch up over a coffee or a meal. I miss not having a panic attack everytime someone either sneezes or coughs around me.

I miss travelling, sightseeing, visiting different countries, trying different cuisines, visiting family overseas.

I generally just miss the wonderful pre-COVID lifestyle that I once took for granted. Praying that I can find a way out of this COVID mess, but in the meantime, I'm going to need my psychologist to keep me grounded. Someone with a voice of reason to ensure when my anxiety and panic sets in, a way to cope.

This forum has helped me feel a bit better that there is an outlet to talk about how we are feeling, coping or not coping with COVID situation.

[BunnyRabbit]

Hi Fiatlux

I feel the same way too! In fact I haven't driven a car since COVID started. My hubby does all the grocery runs and anything related to outdoors. I only go out, if I must (i.e. medical appointments or when my delivery guy doesn't bother delivering but immediately cards my parcel for collection at the post office 🙃).

I was just talking to hubby the other day and said, I don't know if I can still drive the car, it's been so long.

I still wear a mask going outside too, I don't think I'll be taking it off even though most people have. At work they're talking about back to office. This causes me great anxiety and stress because we don't need to wear masks, but only last week we had a confirmed case of COVID in the office. It's pretty much everywhere and I struggle with the thought that I will eventually have to find a way to 'live with COVID'.

You're right, the mask does help with anxiety a bit, emphasising 'a bit'. I'm struggling with the thought of 'how long am I going to keep shielding?' I don't want to be doing this forever.

It might get to a point where I need to learn to accept 'some' risks and learn to cope with anxiety. I'm not sure how but I can't see COVID going away in the near future. It very hard because of the uncertainty and we as humans are very good at worrying about worst case scenario.

I feel like there will be a different class of people, the vulnerable cohort that is disconnected from society because of fear and anxiety.

I think it's going to change society too, grandparents are over represented in this group, grandchildren are seeing less of their grandparents because they want to keep the grandparents protected. Children will have that exposure to caring for the elderly. Learning empathy, patience and vulnerability that they would have when spending time with their grandparents.

As always, I hope we find a way out of this mess soon. We've had pandemics before, such as the Spanish flu, and we managed to get rid of it. Let's hope COVID will be a distant thing of the past and we can talk about it to our future generations about how we survived.

Stay well and safe!

[Fiatlux]

I am actually working from my office alone today. First time in many months. My home internet is playing up, so I was forced to go to office.

I was driven in and locked the front door. I don’t need or want to deal with anyone face to face.

I have the radio playing music and I am getting through paperwork.

I am in Melbourne so things are still quiet. The neighbouring businesses are still all closed or they’ve moved out.

later I will be picked up and driven home. I am taking it one day at a time.