WHEN 'YES YES' BECOMES 'NO NO'

[The_Bro]

Hi Everybody

Learning that all of our Olympians from South Australia have to endure two lots of quarantine on return to Australia got me thinking.

Here they are, enduring unimaginable sacrifices and years of training to become champions and represent our country, being tested for Covid every day in Tokyo and again when entering Australia, quarantining for 14 days on arrival, then having to go into a second 14 days in South Australia. I can't see the common sense in that.

I wonder how they feel about that level of recognition?

This made think about the times I have looked forward to something like picking up a new car, getting all excited, then being told delivery was running late.

Or being told I had got the job I applied for after three rounds of interviews. Getting excited with anticipation, then being told there was another interview yet to pass!

Or even going on a first date with a new girl, then she calls with apologies and can't make it. Even though setting another date, my level of anticipation took a blow.

Just wondering how our forum members have experienced things like this happening to them where something they looked forward to was delayed, and how they handled their emotions?

I found it was easy to get annoyed at the situation, or the person causing the delay - of course this didn't help!

With the added job interview, after thinking about it, I used it as an opportunity to learn a bit more about the company, thought about how I could improve on previous interviews, and as a result of this, sailed through it and got the job!

With the late car delivery, I cleaned out the garage to make more room for the car and was amazed by the extra room created!

With the delayed date, I later learnt she had a family emergency and her delay was genuine. Our delayed date was great!

Are these an example of every cloud has a silver lining?

Is it better to live in the moment and not let anticipation control our emotions?

Would love to hear your thoughts - has good things being delayed happened to you and how did you respond?

Many thanks - The Bro

[quirkywords]

The bro

thanks for this thread.

I suppose I have low expectations so I won’t get disappointed.

it could be seen as worst case scenario, but I like to think I am a realist.

I don’t expect delivery’s to arrive on time so am not disappointed when they are late.

I don’t expect people to keep in touch but if they do I am pleasantly surprised.

Not sure I am in the right track .

[The_Bro]

Hi quirkywords - Thanks for your reply which is really interesting. It certainly got my attention and also got me thinking!

Is it best to look on the bright side so to speak, or as you say to have lower expectations, so that a pleasant surprise is more likely? Is there a right and a wrong to this subject?

I have to say that I think it's better if we plan to be the best human that we can be. This by definition means aiming a little higher than we think we can achieve, and expecting a greater return.

The world is full of successful and happy achievers (personal, business, sport) who confess they have big helpings of self belief - they give answers like 'I didn't think I could do that but gave it a good crack'.

Glass half full instead of glass half empty kind of people. Of course this doesn't mean blindly rushing into impossible tasks without homework first.

I wonder in your case where your expectation are not always high, whether doing a list of possible outcomes from not very good to exceeding expectations might help? Pick one near the middle of your list but slightly higher and aim for that?

You are sure to have talent and capabilities, sometimes it takes an unexpected happening for us to realise what they are, or simply being the right person in the right place at the right time.

I guess if we don't go after something our chances of getting it are reduced.

One other point in your post to think about is that when dealing with others, if you let them know very clearly what your expectations are, they are more likely to deliver what you expect and make a slightly better effort to give you what you want! But this opens up a whole new subject around communication and clarity.

So to finish up, your points may well be a good solution to not being disappointed. Difficult to draw a line in the sand on this subject. Having low expectations doesn't mean you are unhappy. I just can't help feeling that you might move forward to where you want to be if your expectations are a little higher.

I hope this has helped a little bit, thanks heaps for your post which I can't stop thinking about!

Happy to chat further anytime if you like.

Bye for now, The Bro