Dear One Step~
The constant noise in your ears, lack of balance and feeling like throwing up is incredibly wearing and frightening. As sleep is absent the whole thing becomes very hard to deal with, and yes I guess in some ways you are alone.
I now how it is, I have one ear with permanent noise and little else, it is not as serious as your situation by any means but even that constantly going on can wear one down.
I would imagine you doctor was trying to help with the anti-anxiety meds, but such things are introduced and monitored as they do not always work out well. Does you doctor know they are causing problems and making things worse?
You have listed a whole load of people, your wife, parents, brothers and sisters. When in distress it is easy to assume everyone is too busy, can't help, or don't want to. Are you sure this is true? You wife may indeed be worried about the future, but that is something you need to face together, you can understand her worries, she can understand your problems and each support the other.
I only found out how caring, strong and determined my wife was when I became really ill. Up until then I did not feel I could put extra burden on her, then I had little choice.
Most parents -of any age -want to help their offspring in hard times, are you sure they don't want to know? The same applies to your brother and sisters.
In all those people is there not even one you can confide in, share your fears and distress? Sharing does help, as you know.
When thngs improve I think your idea of being there for others is great, in fact it why this whole place exists and why it works - mutual support.
I hope your hearing is sorted out quickly and you sleep and balance restored
Croix
