Struggling with OCD

[0Sarah0]

I'm a young girl who has recently turned 18.

I'm battling with OCD and it haunts me everyday. Washing my hands until they bleed and shutting doors repetitively have been an unhealthy habit of mine for years. I have never opened up in a format like this, but because many people here are in a similar situation, it must be the most understanding discussion space. My family is supportive of me in every aspect however, they are very tough luck oriented, so i feel i wouldn't get taken very seriously if i was to open up, or it would appear as if I'm looking for attention. My friends aren't very helpful sources to confide in because when i try to talk to them, they don't know what to say (as is to be expected because what is there to say). I have seen a psychologist in the past to discuss anxiety, yet whenever i would try to talk about OCD it was somewhat disregarded. People think the state of my hands is from the skin condition Psoriasis (which is true to a degree) but I'm scared to tell them about my compulsion. Recently having to put on hand sanitizer as i walk into school (due to the current state of the world) is miserable and it feels like acid on my hands.

I just wanted to be comforted by understanding people because often times it feels like I'm alone in my feelings. But to end on a positive note, i couldn't have been more lucky with my friends and family because not many people have something so amazing.

[Sophie_M]

Hey Sarah, welcome to the Beyond Blue forums. We're glad to hear you've been able to relate to some of the stories posted by other members. Our community is certainly a welcoming and non-judgmental space, so please feel free to share your thoughts and we'll do our best to support you.  We're so sorry to hear about your struggle with OCD. It sounds very painful and isolating. Can we ask, are you still receiving mental health support? We understand it can be really tough to cope sometimes, especially if you don't have a lot of support from family or friends. If you would like some help finding mental health support, we would recommend that you get in contact with the Beyond Blue Support Service. They are available 24/7 by phone on 1300 22 4636 or on Webchat 3pm-12am AEST on our website: www.beyondblue.org.au/getsupport . They will give you support and point you in the right direction for help in your area. Many of our members have also been through a lot in their lives and will be able to talk through these feelings with you.  If you would like to post further, please tell us more about what's on your mind and how we can best help support you.

[jess334]

Hi 0Sarah0,

Welcome to the forums and thanks for reaching out!

It sounds like you are having trouble trusting anyone enough to talk to them about your OCD. Have you tried talking to a regular GP about it? Maybe they can refer you to a psychologist who specialises in treating people with OCD.

I think its really important for you to keep trying to find help. Unfortunately these issues don't go away by themselves and it sounds like you really need someone to talk to about it.

Of course the forum is always here too. 😁.

Kind thoughts, Jess

[Gambit87]

Hi 0Sarah0.

Welcome to the forums!

I can certainly relate - I have Harm OCD - basically I constantly worry/get intrusive thoughts about causing harm to myself and others. I felt so much shame I never told anyone for years - even my girlfriend and when you cant tell anyone and talk about it - it is incredibly isolating, Even though I know I would never hurt myself or anyone.

My compulsions are that I have to make sure the gas stove is off, doors are locked and taps are off, its annoying because I know that they're all off, locked and checked but I have to check them.

I opened up to my girlfriend about my ocd/intrusive thoughts and she has been so great. I've found a great psychologist who has been helping me understand whats happening, helping me acknowledge that these are just thoughts and not me. I've learnt that my depression and anxiety feeds my OCD and the more you feed it the worse it gets. I'm learning with the help with my psychologist not to feed my OCD, to let them go. Its hard work but im getting better at it.

If im not anxious - my OCD is barely there.

You are not alone!

My advice,

These forums are a godsend.

Open up and talk about it, its freaking hard but once you start It lifts a huge weight off your shoulders.

See another psychologist - cannot stress that one enough. You might have to see a few to find someone that you gel with but once you do its worth it.

All the best!

If you're ok with it, please let us know how you go!