Social Anxiety

[Max26]

Hey, this is my first post here... not sure really how this thing goes, but I'll give it a try.

I suffer from social anxiety among other things, but I have to say this one is the most disabling one on my life. Im 25 and feeling the pressures of society on my shoulders, I can also feel my anxiety holding me back.

I feel as if I'm living my life on the sidelines. I want to break this habit, I don't want to be to scared to pursue a career or anything else because I'm afraid. Just not don't where to start...

[MissBenthos]

Hey Max, welcome 🙂

Ok, I just sat there for a while after writing the first line trying to think of the right thing to say and you know what? That kind of is the anxiety for me, the whole trying to be perfect thing but none of us are perfect. No matter how long I spend thinking about all the possibilities and consequences of the things I say there's still a chance it could upset someone. So I try to just be myself, flaws and all instead of trying to be a perfect human because there's no such thing. And logically I'm sure you know this too but it's still hard to break the habit of being scared to fail.

I'm not sure what you've tried before posting here but the things that helped me most was seeing a doctor + psychologist, medication and getting myself out of a bad work environment. Opening up for the first time was super hard, I could barely spit out that I needed help to my doctor in the beginning and I was so embarrassed that I was crying uncontrollably. Talking about things slowly got easier the more sessions I attended.

Have you talked about this with anyone apart from us on this forum?

[humbleb]

start small mate.. if you see the steps to get to where you want, pick the easiest small one first and go at your pace. When you feel like moving on a bit, you can do it 👍👍👍

[lovelife17]

Start small maybe try some small talk with a stranger like a checkout operator. Try doing something out of your comfort zone. It is hard to begin with but will get better over time. Good Luck 🙂

[Max26]

Exactly what I try tell myself no one is perfect, I guess the main problem I have is that I worry to much about what other people think of me. I also have body dysmorphia, which I know plays a big part in my social anxiety.

I used to go to headspace, was defiantly awkward at first, but I can say I learnt some ways to cope with some of my let's say issues, but now I've passed the age bracket. I can't really afford to pay for a therapist and I was always to scared to rely on medication, so I've never taken anything for this.

the environment I was working in was tense and aggressive. I realised my anxiety was at its peak and something need to be done, so I decided the break my habit and quit my job. Wasn't easy, I took a massive risk but I know I did the right thing for me. I just can't help but feel lost now. I have no direction. I wanted to try study something new, but the thought of a classroom makes me feel sick. I just don't think I can do it.

[Max26]

I know this will sound weird, but I'm afraid of lines. I used to avoid them or look down at the ground. Scared of any attention. People looking at me, talking about me.

I do see this as a small step. I try not to avoid them anymore. And as hard as it is I try to look up and not be afraid.

nothing major but I guess it's a start

thanks everyone for your time I appreciate it

[blondguy]

Hey Max

Happy Easter (I hope) and good on you for being a part of the forums!

You are an amazing strong person. There is nothing weird about anything you say whether its about lines or lack of self esteem. Sometimes when our mind is tired we get these fears and avoidance patterns happening. I felt the same as you did a few years ago. It does go away....with some regular help from your doc!

I read what MissBenthos posted above and she is spot on....

MIssBenthos Said: "the things that helped me most was seeing a doctor + psychologist,
medication and getting myself out of a bad work environment. Opening up
for the first time was super hard, I could barely spit out that I needed
help to my doctor in the beginning and I was so embarrassed that I was
crying uncontrollably. Talking about things slowly got easier the more
sessions I attended.

Humbleb also mentioned starting small.....the best way to start to heal

you are not alone here

Paul