Social Anxiety Affecting Work

[Tony25]

I chose a role in which requires me to have regular meetings and client contact. Unfortunately, due to my social anxiety, I feel routinely overwhelmed and unsuited for the role. I chose the role thinking I could grow and learn, but 2 years now I constantly take days off. I don't feel suitable to the work and I regularly feel guilty for skipping work. I feel stuck because of the current covid situation. I also lack confidence because my social anxiety has hampered my work in the past. It just so happened my current role directly involves speaking that makes me overwhelmed.

I think the best decision would be to suck it up due to the current situation, but I generally feel like I have lost interest, motivation, and confidence. I am regularly speaking with counsellors and I have a therapist. I feel better for a time, but I go back to giving uo and wanting to leave the job.

I guess I am just looking for any advice.

[LS128]

Hi Tony25,

Welcome to the Forum. It is very brave of you to reach out and I am sorry to hear that you are feeling overwhelmed in your role, and that you are experiencing feelings of social anxiety.

First, it is completely normal to sometimes feel overwhelmed in a role at work. However, you should never feel unsuitable for the work you are doing. It is always worth remembering that you applied for the role, and were chosen as the best candidate for the role. This is something we often forget in a day-to-day role. Nerves before a meeting or discussion is something that even the most successful and charismatic individuals face. The fact you are openly acknowledging this already has you on the pathway to success in your career.

It is really great that you have reached out to counsellors and have a therapist. I hope that you are making good progress with them, and it seems you are feeling better for a period of time. A potential suggestion for future sessions is to maybe focus on mechanisms and techniques that you can apply on a daily basis when you do feel overwhelmed. There are also some Beyond Blue resources here for better supporting yourself (link below). Some things I find helpful are going for walks to clear my head when feeling overwhelmed in the work day, and also having a mentor to openly discuss things. Hopefully these are outlets that are available to you.

https://www.beyondblue.org.au/personal-best/pillar/supporting-yourself

Covid is a challenging situation particularly from a career perspective, and I am sorry you are feeling stuck. However, you are doing all the right things by seeking advice on one of the most important things in your life which is your mental health in a challenging time. This will set yourself up well for when things start bouncing back.

I hope that the above was helpful to you. It is courageous to recognise your emotions. Feel free to write back with any questions that you may have, and we will all be here to listen.

Warm Regards,

LS128

[Aphador]

Hi Tony25,

Great to see you here, thank you for reaching out.

I also used to have pretty bad social anxiety. I don't know if I can offer you anything that your therapist hasn't already, but I am here if you ever need to talk/vent :). I know there are not many jobs available right now, but there are still some going. Have you thought about searching for more suitable jobs whilst working this one? Maybe something great will pop up 🙂

Aphador 🙂

[Homemaker_Rae]

Hi Tony, your post really resonated with me.

I have had crippling social anxiety for many years. It has improved significantly over the last 4 years thankfully, but still affects me every day.

I feel for you with your work. I am not working at the moment due to redundancy late last year, but when I was working some days were excruciating. Fortunately I was only part-time. I don't think I could work full-time.

During some particularly difficult times, I used my annual and long service leave to have a break. I have also been seeing a psychologist for a number of years which has been very helpful.

I do hope to return to work over the next few months. I am seriously considering connecting with an agency that supports people with anxiety and other mental health issues to find suitable employment. I don't want to go back to the work I was doing. I am also considering doing a certificate of some sort to help me change career paths.

Thinking of you. Good job on reaching out here. As hard as it can be, I think connecting like this is so helpful. All the best to you, Tony.

[Tony25]

Thanks for sharing your experience. I would like to take a certificate too, but it just isn't the right time with covid financial concerns. I feel bad because I already have a graduate degree and I feel like I will disappoint myself and others for giving up this career path. I am also not too sure if a career change will make much difference with social anxiety. So I have a lot of factors to consider.

[Homemaker_Rae]

Yes, you're right, there are lots of factors to consider. I graduated with my degree 20 years ago, so I am perhaps at a different point in life.

Thanks for sharing your story too. I find it's reassuring to know I am not alone in my experience. I appreciate being able to share my story too. Take care, Tony.