Resigned From Work due to Anxiety

[J10]

Hi,

I made the decision to resign from my job today due to my mental health. Specifically dealing with my anxiety. I know people are struggling at the moment to keep their jobs or have lost their jobs due to covid. You would think I would be grateful to have had a job in this covid pandemic world we live in.

However, it was a constant upheaval battle everyday with dealing with my anxiety as well as working as a customer service representative in a company that required high standards be met to its customers. Having being on a return to work plan after attempting suicide 2 months ago due to a horrible team leader, I thought I could handle going back to my original role of taking inbound calls. However, there is only so much you can do to implement strategies to overcome your anxiety when dealing with challenging and difficult customers and meeting the expectations of the company with each interaction. To strike this balance, in the long run, was going to be exhausting and was tiring before my suicide attempt. I was tired, rundown and exhausted.

A meeting was arranged to discuss whether I could be moved to a different team in which the work involved would have being less stressful and anxious. However, the company wasn't willing to accommodate this request due to business needs and for what I was originally contracted for when employed by the company. I guess that was understandable.

The only thing that really got me during that meeting was the fact that I felt management invalidated my feelings and thoughts surrounding the circumstances of my suicide attempt. My suicide attempt was caused by my previous team leader and his management style. His lack of empathy and compassion towards someone who deals with mental health illness everyday. I felt management were protecting and defending their own by saying that his style or rather the way he approached me in terms of constantly reminding me of my mistakes, making feel guilty and playing on my insecurities was never intentional. It was never to hurt me or be malicious. But it was hurtful. It scarred me and got me to the point that the only option I had left to escape how he made me feel was to end my life.

For a company that preaches empathy and patience with everything, their actions demonstrate they are unable to understand the point of views of others.

So, long story short, I believe I made the right decision to leave this job. I feel relieved. I see this as an opportunity to find something better.

[Sophie_M]

Hi J10,

Welcome to our Beyond Blue forums. We are so glad you've posted here tonight and shared what you're going through. To begin with, we are very proud of you for taking the step for looking after your well being. It sounds like your work environment was bringing you a lot of anxiety and the management style was detrimental for your mental health. These are difficult times but it's more important than ever to be looking after our well being. We are sorry you've been through so much. Do you mind us asking who you have in your life that is a support for you? Have you been able to speak to anyone close to you about your feelings or even someone like a GP? Please know that you never have to go through this alone, and support is always here for you.

If you would like to talk to someone, the Beyond Blue Support Service is available 24/7 by phone on 1300 22 4636 or on Webchat 1pm-12am AEST on our website: www.beyondblue.org.au/getsupport  One of our friendly counsellors will be able to talk through these feelings with you and can offer support, advice and referrals.

We also strongly urge that in overwhelming moments you get in touch with our friends at Lifeline (13 11 14) or the Suicide Call Back Service (1300 659 467).

We hope that you will find some comfort here on the forums. Please feel free to keep reaching out here on your thread whenever you feel up to it.

[geoff]

Hello J10, and thanks for joining the forums.

What you have told us must be disappointing, in that the team leader knew how to manipulate this in a way they could finally get you to make this decision and resign, but it doesn't mean that you can't file a report to the Aus Human Rights Commission or file a report with your doctor and then approach legal aid, but only if this is what you want to do because the consequences for you have been serious, from what you have told us.

Your choice to find something easier will be rewarded, but before this happens, you need to decide whether or not to follow through with HRC and/or with a lawyer, but understand if you don't want to, but can I also suggest that you talk with your doctor who will refer you onto a psychologist and if this does happen then your sessions may be paid for, just ask your doctor who will advise you.

Please take care.

Geoff.

[therising]

Hi J10

I feel for you so deeply as you make your way through some seriously mind altering life changing challenges.

I believe you should feel incredibly proud of yourself for having resigned from your job. This must have been such a tough challenge to meet. I imagine you went through a massive reasoning stage, looking for reasons to stay and reasons to leave. You definitely had a lot of good reasons to leave, in my opinion.

Personally, I can't work with the public. Have worked in the care industry for years, since having established this. While there can be some wonderful people in the world, I can't tolerate angering or depressing people when it's ongoing. You know those kinds of people who tell you how how stupid you are, how ignorant, how bad at you're job you are, how hopeless you are and so on. I think, in working with the public, I'd be the sort of manager who'd regularly be fired based on the advice I'd give to such depressing people, 'Dude, based on your sh*tful depressing self-righteous attitude you've obviously got no filter. Go work on yourself and then come back'. 🙂 Hope I got a smile out of you.

Looking back at my years in depression, which are behind me now, I marvel at how I managed to navigate through the seriously depressing attitudes of people. As a mum now, I also marvel at how my teenage kids manage to navigate through similar challenges. Having come to gradually understand the abilities that come with being sensitive, I say to my kids 'Do not lose your sensitivity', as opposed to telling them to 'Toughen up'. 'Toughen up' actually grinds my gears a little.

I advise my kids to stay sensitive to who's depressing and what's depressing. You'll feel it. Sense who's degrading, who's got no filter, who's got issues, who's inspiring, what's exciting, what feels off and so on. What feels 'off' about someone is something you get a feel for, the more sensitive you become. It's like a gut feeling.

To me, it sounds like you didn't leave a job, you left a paid form of torture. I'm so glad you're out of there. You met the challenge, by leaving. That challenge is now complete. By the way, you're a legend to have made it through. A whole new challenge begins - taking care of your well being and developing your self toward a new job. Whether you need a little time, for a breather in between, is something you may be able to feel.